The SmarK RAW Rant – 07.30.12
No longer the Supershow, apparently.
Live from Cincinnati, OH
Your hosts are Michael Cole & Jerry Lawler
CM Punk starts us out, and he still hasn’t debuted the new belt yet. He’s been SILENT on Twitter all week, which is like the 2012 version of a heel turn, I guess. So Punk talks about how he didn’t appreciate Jerry Lawler accusing him of turning his back on the WWE Universe last week. Punk goes to sit on the announce table and talk to Lawler in a nice touch, complaining about how The Rock is not part of WWE, but merely an outsider from Hollywood who was “gifted” a title match and yet continues to treat Punk with disrespect. But now he’s quiet after getting his ass kicked by Punk. Big Show interrupts and Punk thinks Show is stealing his spotlight, too. Show thinks he just might be, because he cost John Cena the title last week and Punk would have tapped without his interference. ANGRY JOHN CENA charges out for some reason and chases Show out of the ring. This all brings out GMAJ to announce Big Show v. John Cena for the Summerslam title shot. All the buildup of Crazy AJ, and now she’s out there in a business suit like Stephanie Jr. and making #1 contender matches like every other GM ever did. She’s just Eve Torres now. At least when they were getting her over, it was a unique character who was doing something different. They really thought this was a good direction for her?
Santino Marella v. Alberto Del Rio
Really? We get to watch ADR squash the US champion in 90 seconds for the millionth time? Santino attacks and gets laid out for his troubles, but fights back until Del Rio hits him with a snap suplex and works on the arm in the corner. Blind charge misses and Santino puts him on the floor, and we TAKE A BREAK. Holy cow, Santino made it to the commercial break! Back with Del Rio hitting a double stomp and going back to the arm again until Santino escapes with a backdrop suplex. ADR cuts off the comeback, but misses another double stomp, allowing Santino to set up for the Cobra…until the armbreaker finishes at 6:40. Just a long squash for Del Rio. *1/2 Why don’t they just take the damn US title off Santino? He’s literally just a jobber at this point and all it’s doing is making the belt look more worthless every week.
Brodus Clay is out for his weekly dance, but Vickie Guerrero interrupts to show off her own Elaine Benes-like skills. Yeah, it’s a three hour show, why do you ask? Damien Sandow interrupts this for some reason, still upset about getting beat up by D-X last week, and lays out Brodus for the intellectually stimulating beatdown. Hey, finally a program for both guys!
Meanwhile, Daniel Bryan gets up the courage to burst into AJ’s office, and she punishes him with a match against Sheamus tonight, to be voted on by the fans! It can be a street fight (no holds barred), a street fight (falls count anywhere), or a street fight (street fight). Seriously?
For those keeping track, that first hour was 6 minutes of wrestling and about 20 minutes of recaps of previous shows or video packages.
Sheamus v. Daniel Bryan
The winning street fight is STREET FIGHT. Wow. I feel so involved now. Bryan beats on him in the corner, but Sheamus puts him down with an elbow and drops knees for two. They fight onto the floor and Sheamus backdrops him on the ramp, but Bryan fires back with kicks to put Sheamus down on the concrete, and follows with a flying knee off the ramp. And we take a break. Back with Bryan dropkicking Sheamus to the floor, but Sheamus suplexes him into the railing and then back to the floor again. Sheamus grabs some weapons and Bryan uses the kendo stick on him, then dropkicks him into a chair in the corner for two. Back to the floor and Sheamus gets sent into the post and then into the railing. Back in, Sheamus quickly comes back and finishes with the brogue kick at 12:45. Bryan Alvarez is right – Sheamus is turning into HHH more and more every week. ***
And we get MORE REPLAYS while Bryan lays around in the ring selling the beating. Truth and Kofi come out to tell Bryan to get lost, and Bryan punts Little Jimmy out of the ring. Bryan’s men in white coats come out to get Truth, but AJ has them escort Bryan out instead. I feel like I missed a week here – what exactly did Bryan do to AJ that was so horrible? Try to have her committed for being crazy? She IS crazy! CM Punk said so! And why did Bryan have them ready to come out and commit R-Truth? This was all really stupid.
Speaking of stupid, we get some particularly retarded Touts to add to the endless replays, Twitter polls, video packages, website plugs, freak Titantron fires, commercials, and talking.
Kofi Kingston v. Titus O’Neil
So yes, this Kofi/Truth thing stretches over two segments and a commercial break. Welcome to the three-hour era. Titus catches Kofi on a crossbody attempt and hits a backbreaker, and a slam gets two. Kofi fires back and hits the dropkick and leaping clothesline to come back, and the Boomdrop brings Darren Young into things. AW tosses his shoe at Kofi so that Kofi can get distracted like a moron, and Titus finishes with a powerbomb at 2:50. Wow, one of these goofs finally won a match after two months of being #1 contenders. Also, AW makes a rape joke and is probably going to get fired for it. Let this be a lesson about putting a live microphone on people without live TV experience.
Meanwhile, Punk has a man-to-man talk with Cena, and advises him to let go of the hate. And of course we have to replay this after the break, because we have to replay EVERYTHING tonight, no matter how trivial.
Heath Slater v. Randy Orton
Having exhausted his supply of legends to job to, Slater challenges any current star, which brings out Orton. Slater attacks and gets nowhere, as Orton quickly finishes him with his usual at 1:14. Good thing they devoted all that TV time to getting Slater over. ½*
Meanwhile, Bryan gets interviewed by a psychiatrist. And we are BARELY even at the two hour mark yet.
Christian & Chris Jericho v. The Miz & Dolph Ziggler
Christian flapjacks Ziggler for two right away, and then beats on the Miz to send him running. Jericho comes in and the heels work him over for a bit, but he evades Ziggler and goes up with a flying axehandle on Ziggler to dump him. Miz gets dumped as well and Christian hits them with a dive as we take a break. Back with Miz getting the chinlock on Jericho, but Christian comes in with a back elbow on Ziggler and a sunset flip out of the corner for two. Dolph hits him with a dropkick for two and Christian is the Canadian-in-peril. Miz boots him down for two and the heels do a beatdown in the corner before Ziggler goes to another chinlock to continue stretching things out. Ziggler whiffs on the fameasser, as Christian looked like he missed his cue, and they do a second try so that Christian can reverse into a powerbomb and make the hot tag. Lionsault gets two on Miz, but Ziggler breaks it up and it’s BONZO GONZO. Miz escapes the Walls, but walks into the codebreaker at 12:30. Perfectly Acceptable Wrestling to fill 15 minutes of airtime. ***1/4
Meanwhile, Daniel Bryan continues using up precious, precious TV time, taking an inkblot test and reinforcing his craziness.
Tyson Kidd v. Tensai
Yes! It’s the rallying cry of WWE apologists, the dream of the FIFTEEN MINUTE TYSON KIDD MATCHES to fill up 3 hours of RAW. So yeah, Tensai in fact squashes the fuck out of him, but Kidd gets his one rollup for the near-fall and a Buff Blockbuster for two. Tensai finishes with the Baldobomb at 2:11. He continues beating the everloving piss out of Kidd afterwards, so the ref reverses the decision. Yes, it’s the stupidest finish in wrestling, the one where a guy wins clean in dominating fashion, but the other guy wins on a reversed decision because he was getting his ass kicked too much. Anybody give a shit about Tensai yet? ½*
Meanwhile, the doctor wraps up his examination of Bryan, and Kane beats him up for the payoff. I guess. I should point out that even my wife, who doesn’t even watch wrestling and is just kind of half-watching while I do, asks “How LONG is this show, five hours?!” at this point.
And now, our THIRD in-depth recap of HHH-Lesnar from last week. End this show now, please.
Generic #1 Contender match: Big Show v. John Cena
Show slowly beats on Cena, but misses the FRYING PAN OF DOOM and Cena puts the sleeper on him. And they stretch that out for TWO MINUTES, until Show goes down and Cena gets two. And we take a break to get a respite from all this excitement. And now it’s the bearhug. Cena comes back with the world’s worst DDT and it’s time for the FIVE MOVES OF DOOM because they’ve managed to use up 15 minutes of precious, precious airtime, but Show chokeslams him for two. Cena bails to escape (and use up more precious, precious airtime) and Cena collides with Punk at the table, which prompts Punk to attack both guys when Cena tries the FU on Show for the no-contest at 16:00. Are you fucking kidding me? Nearly twenty minutes with intros for THAT finish? * Punk declares them both losers, but GMAJ comes out and makes the SHOCKING ANNOUNCEMENT that in fact it will be a triple threat match at Summerslam. Punk calls her a BAD GM! Holy shit! PIPEBOMB! It’s the Summer of Punk all over again!
The Pulse:
Wait, what happened with Brock and HHH again? I forgot already.
This show was a nightmare. Performed in two hours, this could have been different.
ReplyDeleteBut man! So many things to gripe about. All the snafus, recaps, social media blurbs, continuity errors, and all of this topped off by AW committing Career Suicide....
* for the main? Wayyyyyyyyyy too low. That was a very solid Show/Cena match. And another very good Sheamus/Bryan match plus Punk owning on commentary and on the opening promo make this much better show than they have been on for a while.
ReplyDelete3-hour Raw is going to be worth it for the SK recaps alone.
ReplyDeleteI thought the show was better than I expected it to be (mainly due to a couple good, longer matches) but overall, not terribly exciting. I hated the end though for two reasons. #1, so incredibly predictable because they do this all the time to set up triple threat matches, and Punk looks like a moron for saying they both lose when this has been done a million times and it always results in a triple threat.
ReplyDelete#2, I'm really concerned with the direction of Punk as a heel. To me there are three main types of heels...the big monster heel, the cerebral type heel, and the chickenshit heel. WWE seems to have completely forgotten about the second type the last few years, with everyone being a chickenshit heel (Miz, Del Rio, pre face turn Sheamus, Bryan although Punk and Sheamus at Extreme Rules made him look better, Ziggler) and the occasional monster thrown in. I expressed concern that Punk would end up as another chickenshit heel who can't win clean, and was told by a lot of people that there was no way that would happen, they'll definitely book him as the opportunistic cerebral type heel who might take advantage of a less than legal tactic but can win matches clean. Maybe they still will, but the thing that really got me at the end of the show was Lawler, essentially calling Punk straight to his face a boring guy who nobody wants to watch. Punk ripped him back as a shitty commentator, but they would NEVER, NEVER have done that to heel HHH back in the day, and not because of his relationship with Stephanie...because you never call one of your top guys boring. The people they've done that to are the chickenshits who are supposed to be viewed as inferior to the top guys in order to get people mad that they keep barely hanging onto the title. If that's how they're going to book Punk, I'm going to try TNA on a permanent basis. The fact that his first defense after "he was totally going to lose the match til Big Show interfered" is going to be a triple threat, where he'll undoubtedly retain via "Cena and Show do all the work and sneaky Punk steals a pin", well, I'm concerned.
You know they spent two minutes in a sleeper and then another 2 minutes in a bearhug, right? And the match didn't have a finish? Just checking.
ReplyDeleteMaybe he's judging it against the other 30 Cena-Big Show matches?
ReplyDeleteHow stupid does it make CM Punk look to gripe about being in a Triple Threat title match at Summerslam when EVERY TIME THERE'S A DQ IN A #1 CONTENDER'S MATCH, IT ENDS UP RESULTING IN A TRIPLE THREAT??? It's one of WWE's tried and true (and way overdone) "plot twists".
ReplyDeleteAnd LOL at the three Street Fight choices between Bryan and Sheamus.
SO overdone. I couldn't agree more. Aside from being incredibly predictable, it made Punk look like a moron for not understanding what would happen when it happens EVERY TIME.
ReplyDeleteMaybe the fire fiasco affected the show? It sure did seem silly to see them play the same video recaps five times it felt like. I realize they've been doin' moments ago and Earlier Tonight video recaps for over a decade, but it just felt especially excessive this evening. Even I couldn't stay focused and I love rasslin'.
ReplyDeleteIf it's gonna be 3 hours of longer matches and more amusing stuff like Daniel Bryan, then hell yeah. If it's gonna nights like tonight full of endless recaps then methinks 3 hours it's a slight hell no from this fella. I really wanna believe that the fire threw them for a loop.
I do kinda like some of the Touts though. Some of the folks amused me.
Also a No hold Barred match implies that any wrestling hold is legal. Fish-hooks, chokes, ball-claws, etc. It's still no DQ and no count-outs with the finish havin' to occur in the ring. It usually tends to end with some sort of submission. It's kind of archaic terminology.
A street fight is more of a hard-core match with weapons and combatants in street clothes (which wasn't the case tonight 'cause neither competitor knew they would be involved in a match with said stipulation). It too is no DQ nor countout with pinfalls havin' to occur in the ring. With the main focus bein' the use of foreign objects. It has also been known to end via TKO if you incapacitate your opponent outside of the ring.
A Falls Count Anywhere is a combination of the two with pinfalls bein' able to occur outside of the ring.
Sayin' there all the same isn't wholly accurate. You wouldn't say a Money in the Bank match is the same as a ladder match nor would you say a Hell in the Cell contest is the same as a standard cage match. It kinda is, but it isn't really. The ole "all squares are rectangles, but not are rectangles are squares" logic.
I'm only privy to this knowledge because I have a copy of the official WWE rule book.. I promise.
Ehhh, alright. I rewatched it and I think you're closer to right than I originally judged, at least on that match. I didn't realize the sleeper or the bearhug went on that long and I envisioned Show's heat segment being better than it was. I'll admit to being somewhat of a Show mark and an even bigger fan of his since his heel turn that I think is being underappreciated. But I'd only rate it about ** and the difference between one man's * and another man's ** is not worth quibbling over.
ReplyDeleteIn all fairness to Mr. Punk, I imagine he assumed that GM AJ Lee was crazy like old AJ and probably anticipated that she'd never do the sensible, logical, PREDICTABLE thing.
ReplyDeleteAll I can say is YIKES! This show actually made the 3 hour Russo-booked Nitros look good.
ReplyDeleteNote to TNA: Now might be a good time to move back to Mondays.
And to make a really obscure comparison, Santino Marella is looking like the new Denny Brown at this point. For anyone who might be confused, Denny Brown was a Crockett jobber in the '80s who held the NWA Junior Heavyweight Title for almost two full years despite losing on TV every single week during his entire title reign.
Does that sound similar to a certain US titleholder today?
And what exactly was with all the freakin' recaps tonight? Were Alex Riley, Drew McIntyre, Tyler Reks and Curt Hawkins set on fire along with the stage or something? They couldn't have at least given us a Ryback or an Antonio Cesaro squash match to kill time? Hell, give somebody their own talk show segment if you need to fill time. Zack Ryder would be a good choice, David Otunga's another good choice, it would finally give him something to do. But there are about a million better ways to fill three hours than to give us recaps of stuff that we've just seen five minutes earlier! It's baffling that WWE evidently thinks their entire audience has ADHD and has never heard of DVRs and YouTube. And let's face the facts: WWE hasn't had a great on-air figurehead since Eric Bischoff, so that should be a crystal-clear sign that the whole GM concept needs to come to an end, instead of giving it to someone who mysteriously went from being a toned-down Daffney rip-off to a Stephanie McMahon rip-off as if we were asking for THAT character to return.
So to end this rant, anyone want to guess RAW will be back to two hours by the time Monday Night Football returns?
- The constant recaps were very annoying, especially the HHH-Brock. I understand Brock has limited appearances, but they couldn't get one of Stephanie, HHH, or Heyman to do a segment this week?
ReplyDelete- This show was not as bad as I thought it was going to be. The Tout stuff is pretty easily ignored. We got 2 very solid wrestling matches. The Daniel Bryan stuff really went nowhere but if you're gonna use about 45 minutes of your show on somebody I'm glad it's Daniel Bryan. He's just on fire now.
- The ending seemed kinda cheap, with Punk turning into the stereotypical chickenshit heel. I'd really like to see him continue to get decisive wins leading up to the Royal Rumble (I don't mind if he drops the belt to Rocky there) while at the same time doing everything he can to keep his belt- even if that means cheating, because duh that's what heels do. Just don't turn him into Alberto del Rio circa late-2011.
- del Rio needs to bring back his German suplex. That move looked badass. Love to see him use it on Sheamus.
I appreciate the effort but dude... its the same fucking thing.
ReplyDeleteI said I was boycotting the 3hr RAWS out of spite, but if they are this bad, i still have them on DVR.
ReplyDeleteIm still regretting that i stopped watching thunder back in the day.
He said that?!
ReplyDeleteWhats the over/under on him being fired? I give it 2 days.
Thanks Odd-job, He's the only Asian gentleman I know that wears an bowling hat.
ReplyDeleteOdd-job. Mr. Fuji. Same thing.
Hahaha yeah I heard that Kobe reference too. It's unfortunate that Booker T wasn't around, if there was any time for a "Tell me he did NOT just say that?!" that would've been the prime time.
ReplyDeleteI'm totally fine with Punk cheating to win. What I fear is they're going to make him the chickenshit who can't win without cheating, like every other heel they have right now (even monster Big Show and monster Brock haven't shown they can win a match against anyone above midcard level). Punk should be booked like heel HHH or Edge...guys who can and will cheat to retain their title, but who are booked as absolutely capable of beating anyone clean. Instead I'm concerned he's going to be booked like Miz or Del Rio, guys who suck and can't hang with John Cena but might keep their title (well, in Miz's case anyway) due to crazy happenings or massive cheating just to get a DQ or something like that.
ReplyDeleteIf Punk comes out next week and gives THAT as an explanation, I'll take back what I said.
ReplyDeleteMiz looks better with longer hair and some stubble... not so much the cross of a pretty boy and a pig (b/c of his nose) like he used to.
ReplyDeleteAnd I think Jericho's longer hair helps him age-wise. With the shorter hair he looked kinda run down. Tonight not so much.
Apparently I'm picking up on the wrestlers' hair this evening.
These people are planning to launch an entire network. A NETWORK. HOLY SHIT. THINK OF THE RECAPS
ReplyDeleteHow long until Impact?
ReplyDeleteAW's rape comment was the most memorable thing on this show. Thats not a good thing Vince.
ReplyDeleteI would perversely love to see a ridiculous show on WWE Networks, where they have a show dedicated not to matches, but strictly promos!
ReplyDelete"Summerslam Classic Promos!"
--1997: Bret Hart vs. The Undertaker
--1999: Jeff Jarrett vs. D-lo Brown
--2000: Rock vs. Angle vs. HHH
--2009: CM Punk vs. Jeff Hardy
--2010: WWE vs. Nexus
--2011: John Cena vs. CM Punk
SMELL THE EXCITEMENT.
Well, I wouldn't call AJ a Daffney (AJ was a geek, Daffney was a goth--HUGE difference) or a Stephanie rip-off, but all of your other points are right on.
ReplyDeleteI think you're dead-on with your choices for a 10-15 minute talk show segment. Ryder if we want a snarky new-age Piper type of segment, and Otunga if we want someone just to stir sh*t. Two guys who have a ton of charisma and are just a little lacking in wrestling skills--a show for them would probably put one of them over the top.
And I agree with the recaps. I was joking with a friend earlier that Raw is actually putting on less of a show than before. 3 hours has never been easier! These days, they only have to put on an hour and a half show, and just replay "moments ago" or "a week ago" segments for the other half of the show.
Thanks for the praise John and now that I think about it, I was wrong calling AJ a Daffney rip-off when she was really ripping off Victoria's 2002 "psycho bitch" phase. But if she starts dating Sheamus, then she will be a full-fleged Stephanie rip-off.
ReplyDeleteI liked AJ perfectly fine, but I don't know what it was about tonight that's firmly put her on the "channel-changing heat" wagon for me, but she's on it.
ReplyDeleteI think I might actually tolerate her more if she were doing the crazy person schtick as GM, but then I'd remember that she'd be doing those really irritating, robotic interpretations of the "YES!" chant (completely missing why they worked in the first place: Daniel Bryan's genuine, manic enthusiasm) and skipping around the ring all the time.
Moreover, not that this is necessarily an issue for me, we had no non-AJ Divas on the show tonight (well, I guess Vickie Guerrero was there, but really...). Not a single match or independent Diva segment. And yet, I suspect a Divas match is still going to make it to the Summerslam card, in which case, good luck getting any of the people in LA to care. Granted, nobody cares about the division because WWE has trained the fans not to take it seriously or to invest in any of the competing Divas. In this sense, it's no wonder why so many of them are either contemplating quitting or have quit altogether.
I'm still holding out a strained, desperate hope for more midcarders in matches that get more time, but I know it's just a pipe dream. Speaking of pipes, the lack of pipebomb was genuinely disappointing. I expected a must-see promo, and it was just good. And is it just me, or does CM Punk not really come across as an actual heel at all? I think he's more of a tweener than anything else, except for interrupting the main event and calling Cena a "loser."
It just irks me that it took us three hours to get to the world's most obvious conclusion: A triple threat at Summerslam. Man ALIVE ("there are...men alive!"), I can't think of a staler performer in the HISTORY of this business than The Big Show. Maybe Kane. But it's definitely between those two, who just elicit a huge groan anytime they appear on screen. They're good at what they do and all, and they're by all accounts great guys, but I sort of wish they'd just retire and keep torturing us with their presence each week because there's not a single thing either guy could do to get me to give a beaver's dam about anything they do onscreen; indeed, there's nothing either could do to get me not to actively despair of the product whenever they're onscreen.
That said, the action was good (with Santino showing that he might actually be a decent worker if he wasn't constrained by having to perform his gimmick in the ring all the time - that backdrop suplex was swank as shit), and even Tyson Kidd got a chance to show some decent fire (finish notwithstanding), and that's to say nothing of the tag match in the middle of the show. So the decent action, for me, outweighed the bad action of Cena/Show.
But seriously, this Tout business has GOT to go. I stopped listening to the PWTorch Livecast precisely because I have no interest in listen to the annoying, affirmation-seeking opinions of poorly-spoken nobodies. Your goal should be to lesson the channel-changing content, not add new segments that give people a reason to switch back over to the Olympics. Lord knows, the teen boys have more to look at from the Women's gymnastics floor routine than anything that was on Raw tonight.
By the way, someone at another board counted: There were sixteen recap segments tonight, some of them about the same thing, like the HHH/Brock confrontation and the Titantron fire. SIXTEEN!
As fun as last week's show was, it shows that they can't do a damn thing worthwhile without past stars. There's no way this three-hour mess can last.
You and me both. I've suddenly got an urge to track down and watch such Thunder classics as DDP vs. The Machine and Vince Russo vs. The Masked Heel right now, LOL.
ReplyDeleteBooker T wouldn't be one to talk about dropping inappropriate comments on live television, given that his biggest gaffe is glorified at the start of every Botchamania.
ReplyDeleteThey are half-assing it quite frankly; they are having Punk be a half-assed tweener type because they know holy hell will break out if they turn him.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I would not be shocked if they are going the triple threat angle to basically move the belt from Punk onto Cena via having Cena beat Big Show. Which is chickenshit when you think about it unless they run the angle of Randy Orton costing Punk the title in such fashion and run head first into Punk/Orton as THE top storyline and Orton being sacrificed to give Punk a high profile win while Cena stinks up the top of the card, cahsing Big Show for the belt.
I'm thinking Josh Matthews and Scott Sanford's reaction to that would have been pretty interesting as well.
ReplyDeleteSpeaking of which, why hasn't Scott Sanford been promoted to one of the main shows by now? That guy's excellent. He really is the new Scott Hudson: Far better than the main announcers but never gets respect from anybody.
I agree on Miz's new look.
ReplyDeleteI'm all for Michael Biehn as Intercontinental Champion.
And AJ is yet another way to try and pander to the notion that they can't dare turn Punk evil via giving him an evil GM to feud with to keep him semi good.
ReplyDeleteThe worse thing is that the simple solution is the best one: turn Cena evil and you create a new exciting paradigm for the WWE in terms of match-ups. But we'll never fucking do it because while they are afraid to turn Punk heel, they are utterly GUTLESS on the issue of turning Cena heel, even though he needs it more than Punk does.
If they end the longest WWE title reign in half a decade like that, they really are as stupid as everyone is making them out to be. Especially after talking up the length of Punk's reign as much as they have (including on commentary during the main event tonight).
ReplyDeleteTypically, I fancy the booking ideas of Mr. Jesse Baker, but you gotta be realistic here, brother...
ReplyDeleteThe dude moves merch.
Merch talks, heel turns walk.
Ask the biggest star ever, Stone Cold Steve Austin, why he despised his heel turn in late 2001.
Fuck the PC shit, that was legitimately funny. If he gets fired screw Vince.
ReplyDeleteYeah, rape is awesome.
ReplyDeleteWho brought this guy?
I think the point was that the fans weren't really deciding anything of consequence because they could've done the exact same match for any of the three choices.
ReplyDeleteWhy the hell do they always toss Big Show in Triple Threat matches? All he does is stink up what otherwise would have been a decent match.
ReplyDeleteWe said that about Matt Striker years ago... now look at him.
ReplyDeleteIm tellin you, these johnny come latelys... lol...
ReplyDeleteThe avatars of tact.
Not necessarily. The nWo shirts WCW had made was their biggest selling shirt of all time.
ReplyDelete"
ReplyDeleteI liked AJ perfectly fine, but I don't know what it was about tonight that's firmly put her on the "channel-changing heat" wagon for me, but she's on it."
Business Suit.
Opinion: Michael Biehn Fucking rules.
ReplyDelete30 minutes in, I was dead bored, If you think it's bad for the viewer watching on TV imagine what it's like for someone there in-person. I was half considering going to a taping in October but after tonight I might just say fuck it and not go, it's gotta be torture sitting there watching a 4 hour show and it's nothing but recaps.
ReplyDeleteI haven't wanted MNF to hurry and come back so much until now.
Where was the ass cream for Jericho and Christian?
ReplyDeleteHornswoggle probably got into it before the show.
ReplyDeleteOpinion Seconded: Deadfall FTW!!!
ReplyDeleteAlso that terminating robot movie was pretty good.
I'm on vacation right now I so I checked 411 to check out the results really quick and the first thing I see is a headline about a rape joke. Never change AW, never change...
ReplyDeleteAlas, sir AW, I knew him well. I'll miss all the times he was mic'd up on the side to just yell, "YOU GOT THIS!" and other random nonsense. Still, at least he took the advice of Joker's plastic surgeon: If you gotta go, go with a smile. He trolled the shit out of RAW with that comment, which ended up being the best thing of the night.
ReplyDeleteThese rants could be getting 1999-2000 WCW levels of awesome. Scott suffering through a 3-hour show = SMELL THE BLOG HITS (also, bong hits for anyone trying to sit through a 3-hour RAW every week).
I don't know, some of those matchups look just as brutally awful as a 3-hour RAW. ESPN and the NFL have really dropped the ball on the schedule the last few years, while SNF gets all the awesome matchups.
ReplyDeleteAm I the only one who likes Tensai?
ReplyDeleteFinally reading what happened. If anyone can explain the logic behind putting Big Show in Punk/Cena, I'm all ears.
ReplyDeleteI'm so disappointed by Punk complaining to AJ about the triple threat at the end. As others have pointed out, that was the most logical outcome of his actions; what else could he have been expecting? When he first grabbed the mic, I was really hoping he was about to own the situation and declare the triple threat match himself, saying he wanted to beat Cena and Show to prove he's the "Best in the World". That would have been interesting and different though, but instead we got the same angle we've seen every time we're on the road to a triple threat. This doesn't bode well for heel Punk; it's looking like we aren't going to see any complex shades of gray and instead we'll just get the standard bitter cowardly heel that the WWE has been so in love with this last decade. Kind of like how WWE had something interesting going with Daniel Bryan and AJ, so they called off that relationship and replaced those characters with New Coke Stephanie McMahon and Whiny Heel #235. It's awesome that Bryan can work with whatever he's given, but just like Punk he's was headed toward something special and now he's been forced back into the status quo.
ReplyDeleteThe MNF schedule as follows: Cincy/Baltimore+San Diego/Oakland in Week 1, Denver/Atlanta,GB/Seattle, Chicago/Dallas, Houston/NYJ, Denver/SD, Detroit/Chicago, SF/AZ, Philly/NO, KC/PIT, Chicago/SF, Carolina/Philly, NYG/WAS, Houston/NE, NYJ/TEN, Atlanta/Detroit
ReplyDeleteI don't know about you but I see at least 10 solid games and probably some of those stinkers will be shockers and will be good.
Also, I did not memorize the schedule.
Michael Biehn: Truly a man for all seasons.
ReplyDeleteSee, there's some decent matchups in there (DEN/ATL, HOU/NYJ, DEN/SD, HOU/NE, and ATL/DET depending on where they stand at that point), but there's not a single one in that bunch that makes me amped and after week 1, they pretty much have no really good divisional matchups aside from DET/CHI (and I'm not sold on Da Bears yet). Hell, SNF's Thursday opener is NYG/DAL, that's a way better matchup right out of the gate than just about every single one for MNF. SNF then soon gets Pats/Ravens and Giants/Eagles, and HOU/GB should be an awesome shootout. But who the fuck wants to see Seattle on a Monday Night? Jets/Titans is like one of those endless Kofi vs. Dolph matches we used to get that just fill a match spot but no one's gonna be waiting for that with baited breath. MNF is the flagship night for football but it's like they get the leftovers after SNF gets the good matches (esp. once they flex in the later weeks).
ReplyDeleteStill, I'll probably watching those more than RAW as usual. At least there's no Miami this year after having such a hard-on for them the last few years.
Striker is a lot like Tony Schiavone actually: They're both good as long as you give them free reign. When they're constantly being overproduced and micromanaged however, they're just as terrible as Michael Cole.
ReplyDeletebah weep granah weep nini bong.
ReplyDeleteMy opinion has now been upgraded to FUCKING FACT!
ReplyDeleteBecause no one gave a shit about Albert/Tensai; especially since they won't even acknowledge who he is as far as crafting a character for him outside big guy who gives Vince an errection?
ReplyDeleteAlso, fans will riot if Cena beats Punk so Big Show is there to take the pin....
Daniel Bryan continues his valiant attempt to turn shit into gold. Nearly managed it too.
ReplyDelete"Did Charlie Sheen put you up to this?" and "I knew I was sane" - superb delivery.
Why would any champion like competing in a Triple Threat match? You have to fight two men, and you can lose the title without even being involved in the decision. Should he have been happy at this development?
ReplyDeleteThe fact is that that action fits the character he has evolved into over the past month. He outwardly proclaims himself the best in the world, but inside, he has grave doubts about himself as a champion and as a man. When the chips were down, and he had to make a hard choice between what he knew was the right thing to do and his desire to retain the title that is so important to his fragile ego, he took the easy way out of not helping Cena, and of trying to take advantage of Big Show's attack. He's like a more subtle version of 2001 Austin now.
So his reaction shouldn't be a surprise. He hasn't been portraying shades of grey; he's been portraying a slow dissolution from white to black.
I have a million reasons but ill sum it up with one.
ReplyDeleteCuz he is a HOSS.
It should not matter how a wrestler sells merchandise. If he gets boring, or the product stale, it harms EVERYTHING more if you let him stay face, instead of turning him heel and make new face stars which also will sell merchandise, because they can feud against the new heel and which will make everything more interesting.
ReplyDeleteWhy have they suddenly given AJ her last name again?
ReplyDelete"For those keeping track, that first hour was 6 minutes of wrestling and
ReplyDeleteabout 20 minutes of recaps of previous shows or video packages."
sounds like a 1998 nitro review
Sheamus/Bryan and the tag match were pretty good. I only watched part of the show and the constant recaps were annoying. I mean I can see recapping something once but two or three times is a bit much.
ReplyDeleteBecause she's commisioner!
ReplyDeleteIt came with the pantsuit.
ReplyDeleteYeah, MNF got hosed on the deal, as NBC gets the better games and the flex scheduling. But whatever, the Sunday broadcast is light years better than MNF. Jon Gruden is just the worst.
ReplyDeleteI watched it on dvr and thought it was an awesome episode. Two awesome tv matches, I thought the db stuff, especially punting little jimmy, was awesome. Also I'm glad heel punk is back. And sandow laying a beatdown on funkasaurus was awesome. Love sandow getting time on raw.
ReplyDeleteAlthough the best part is that they fucked up ajs character. Lol at giving her generic heel turn #4,765. This character will have no heat in a few weeks. This is good because 1) the aj character that got over is gone 2) now she just reads shitty heel gm scripts instead of her crappy acting. So abig ha ha to all the aj fans. (Also she's much less hot than evil business eve or Stephanie). Can't wait until October when she's completely off tv.
now give him an energon goodie
ReplyDeleteYeah that could have been a train wreck but db saved it. This was a good showing for him. Who would have thought the American dragon would end up being one of the best onscreen guys since the rock.
ReplyDeletei wanted to like tensai, really bad.
ReplyDeleteHe was tearing it up in Japan, but instead of acknowledging that he was Albert at first and went away to get some skills. they dont let him talk and have him just generic heel #4567.
I cant blame Albert, he is doing what he told.
Blame Vince.
Other than the super long recaps/touts/etc this was actually a great show. I'm surprised you shat all over it Scott. The Daniel Bryan/little Jimmy stuff was hilarious!
ReplyDeleteSince I haven't seen it mentioned in this thread....and since I don't read like 10 different wrestling websites like I did back during the boom years of pro wrestling........I'll mention it here:
ReplyDeleteI get that WWE is PG now, and in 2003 not as much, but this was the same company who had
Big Show say "in my world I'm kobe Bryant, and you're the white girl" during a battle rap with Cena (how's that for some perspective....nearly 9 years ago those 2 were feuding, and you saw what the main event was last night).
The major difference, of course, being that Big Show's line was scripted and approved, and AW's wasn't. Still though, AW's line wasn't nearly as "direct".
Can someone explain to me why grown adults are making TOUTs about wrestling? I thought this would be all kids or something? Also why would anyone make a TOUT about anything?
ReplyDeleteI think this goes down as a legendary performance by db. He carried the show and was funny. Short list of guys who could have done that. He might be the best performer they have and now I think they know it.
ReplyDeleteOh, forgot to mention....my favorite part of Raw last night, hands down, was AW saying "yo mama!!!!" to Kofi before throwing his shoe at him.
ReplyDeleteAnd why would Vince put them on tv. This makes everyone look bad.
ReplyDeleteJabber2 I'm here for you if you need to be consoled about the death of ajs character. I've never been so happy to see the return of the generic heel figurehead of doom. Sure Stephanie eve and vickie were better at it but 4th place should keep her on TV until September. Sometimes wwe booking makes me mad but I I'm glad they fucked this one up! :D
ReplyDeleteThat was a performance for the ages by db. I think he's staying in that main event spot.
ReplyDeleteNaaaargggghhh...*raises hand for chokeslam*
ReplyDeleteIf its on dvr you can through them relatively fast. Just fast forward all the bullshit. Cause there is A LOT of bullshit.
ReplyDeleteSo the big summer angle they've been building up is....
ReplyDeletePunk becomes 02 Jericho???
AJ is going to be his Stephanie if this keeps going like it is (and I still really like AJ)
They're going to have a hard time building Punk up as anything but a placeholder for the Rock at RR
I don't think it was a coincidence that they all sounded like they were from the Deep South
ReplyDeleteBut he yells and hisses a lot! INTENSITY!
ReplyDeleteThat's because the nWo booked themselves to be the coolest heels of all time.
ReplyDeleteThat's because that's what the WWE is turning into.
ReplyDeleteThere was still a ton of SCSA merch during the heel run.
ReplyDelete"Hell, give somebody their own talk show segment if you need to fill time."
ReplyDeletenWo Late Night makes a comeback? Do they need to rehire Scott Steiner to garble the English language on live TV to make it interesting? Tunie into Nitro to find out! (c) Scott Keith
If it's not already crystal clear why JR is only announcing on special occasions, the TOUT revolution should make it so. There is absolutely no way he'd shill TOUT for 3 hours, whereas Michael Cole will happily do it.
ReplyDeleteAnd if any of you ever wondered what the guy who dominated your e-fed for 5 years used to look like (actually you could even look at some of the photos that we see on this blog, even, but that's another story), or what that chick REALLY looked like who used the SaBLeB0mB s.n. in your wrestling chatroom........look no further than these latest TOUT vids. It should give you an idea.
I really expected AJ more suited to her character (a la Mick Foley in a position of power) to sell her crazy, but now she looks like Stephanie McMahon's daughter.
ReplyDeleteWith such a padded Raw, any idea where Rey, the non-AJ divas, Ryder, Sin Cara and the rest of the midcarders were off hiding? All this extra time and they still leave over half the roster off the show.
ReplyDeleteThey've already run with the "Orton costs Punk the belt" angle once in highly unsatisfactory fashion (I mean, Punk didn't even get to lose the belt in an actual match!). Only reason Orton and Punk should be involved at all is for Orton to pull job duty to build Punk up as a strong heel champ.
ReplyDeleteI caught the overrun during an Olympics commercial with my girlfriend.
ReplyDeleteWhen AJ made the Triple Threat and Punk came back out, my gf was like, "ooh this should be good."
Then CM Punk did his lame, Show Me Respect bit...and my gf simply said, "Wow, that was lame."
She summed it up better than I could have. That was lame.
Regardless of anyone here's personal sensitivities, or if you thought it was funny or not: It's a TV-PG show, it's marketed to kids, and Linda is running for Senate again. 14 years ago, he would have been fine. Now, can't do it.
ReplyDeleteEventually there will be a full hour of RAW with nothing but TOUTS
ReplyDelete(with no succinct recap at the end for the TL;DR set)
ReplyDeleteIt's cool. I think I'm a little "recapped" out right now.
Come on, you should know me better than that. This is a completely new role for AJ and it's only been 1 week. So I'm gonna have to... wait for it... wait... almost... LET IT PLAY OUT AND SEE WHERE IT GOES! YYYEEEEEEAAAAAHHH!!!
ReplyDeleteI don't have any more.
ReplyDeleteIt says a lot that Del Rio beating a champion repeatedly diminishes the belt and doesn't raise him up to any. Heres an idea why don't they just have some meaningful interaction between Sheamus and Bertie? The fact they were only separated on the card by a few segments makes me question why nobody thought "hmm we could get Del Rio to attack Sheamus and actually give them more then just being a number 1 contender as a reason for them to wrestle again".
ReplyDeleteI didn't think it was awesome, but it was a rock solid Raw. Touts were annoying, but I thought the 3 of Lesnar/Triple H recap being exactly the same was overkill. AW's line was funny, but in an election year plus WWE being deep into the PG thing, it's not kosher at all. AJ wasn't too annoying, but her character as GM isn't going to work long term I don't think Bryan's skits actually got a bit annoying, but it's not any different from those entire-show running jokes like back in Attitude era. I LOVED him punting Lil Jimmy, and I laughed hard when it happened. Punk trying to be the smart, cerebral heel was fine, but the last exchange with AJ was very very weak. Cena not cutting a promo is good as he can be all over the place with his promos. Del Rio just has no heat, and I have no idea how his "not wrestling on non-PPVs" is going to help his character.
ReplyDeleteI personally loved the "Cena runs at Big Show to get countered match". That happened at least 5 times.
Tensai is so generic. But apparently his Twitter says he's making Sakimoto go to a Waffle House and pay for it.
ReplyDeleteNo clue what's up with the Tensai/Kidd angle. Hope that actually turns into something interesting.
I was hoping Del Rio would cost Sheamus the match against Bryan. Given he's not going to be competing until Summerslam, you could have ADR interrupt every one of Sheamus' matches, getting into his head, putting him off his game.
ReplyDeleteIn this case, ADR causes a distraction leading to a cheap win by Bryan, Sheamus gets pissed off and kicks D-Bry's head off, which leads to the segment that followed with R-Truth. Advancement in the Sheamus/ADR feud (or 'a reason to give a shit'), D-Bry gets a win, and it doesn't change the script. Easy.
One guy's username was SmarkHenry. I have to say that's a pretty awesome screen name, although I wonder if Scott can collect royalties on that?
ReplyDeleteI don't get how they absolutely can't figure out anything to do with Natalya. She's hot, she's got wrestling ability.....she even seems to have a cool personality. Is it that hard to figure out something for her to do???
ReplyDeleteI did something last night I haven't done in... I don't even know how long. Probably around 12 years. I watched Raw LIVE.
ReplyDeleteWhat the hell is wrong with you people? If there was ever a show to DVR it's Raw, especially the 3 hour version.
The show felt "meh" to me, but a big shout-out to my boy D-Bry for carrying the episode with both a great in ring performance (he took some stiff looking shots) and a funny backstage skit. The material wasn't great but as is the case with 90% of funny wrestling bits it's all in the delivery. Also I hope all of you complaining about the "Men in white" not being explained to you last week (even though any idiot could understand they were saving it for SD/this Raw) are happy.
I'm giving them some time (LIPOSWIG baby!) to figure out how they want to present the GMAJ character, but they do need to make her more unique. I don't understand how she's "generic evil authority figure" when she treated 2 heels the worst (although I may have missed some stuff from channel surfing).
It's too bad about AW. Not that I really care about him, but I'm a mark for the PTP.
I'm definitely one if the more positive guys around here, I think the technical term for people like me who don't watch tv shows they hate is "apologist". But even I'm dreading the coming months of 3 hour Raws. I was skimming the comments here and I saw someone point out just how many people were left out of a show that was clearly trying to fill time. Endless recaps (how many times did they recap Brock/HHH?), TOUT vids, SO much filler that I usually just fast forward through. And on the subject of TOUT, yes they suck but I can't bring myself to mock those people. So I'm in a pretty good mood right now knowing that I'm unequivocally a better person than the rest of you. Let's just stick to making fun of Jesse Baker and Drunk Ryan Murphy, okay?
P.S. Just wanted to throw my 2 cents in re: DKR. It was awesome, I wanted to stand up and cheer when Batman started kicking Bane's ass. Catwoman was great (and I thought I was going to hate her), Blake was great, Bane was great (I could understand 90% of what he was saying), and I loved the happy ending. The movie has flaws (whereas DK was practically flawless and BB just had Katie Holmes) and is the "weakest" of the 3, but it's worthy of finishing out the trilogy.
I don't think I like CM Punk anymore. 8 (
ReplyDeleteIf Michael Biehn was on the Expendables, there would be no need to pluralize the term.
ReplyDeleteHa! I like your post just for the LIPOSWIG term.
ReplyDeleteI love JR as much as the next guy, but let's not act like he wouldn't shill the shit outta TOUT.
ReplyDelete"Fruity, delicious, delicious, fruity, fruity..."
Yeah, and it took Tony Atlas to save those segments, too. I think what we're seeing is a combination of bad material and a guy too green to do much more than the basics - if nothing else, that Kobe joke showed a severe lack of judgment.
ReplyDeletetoo long
ReplyDeleteAgree with Scott about AJ, was real disappointed to see her just playing straight up face last night. She was interesting because her character was different and unpredictable, her just being a face is boring.
ReplyDeleteI don't think Bryan brought out the white coat people, AJ did to take Bryan, Bryan just assumed they were there for Truth.
Maybe I am crazy but I want to see Ryback face Tensai.
AJ was clearly a face last night, which is just as boring.
ReplyDeleteI always hear this. He was doing great in Japan. Him and Tomko were something special. I always hear this, but can anyone elaborate? Was he really doing anything different? Because he just kind of lumbers around without intensity.
ReplyDeleteWell yeah I'm not saying Cena shirts would fly off the shelf if he turned heel, just saying I don't think heel/face matters as much as how you're booked.
ReplyDeleteI'm trying to wrap my head around how AJ went from being crazy and skipping all over the ring in Kane masks, CM Punk t-shirts, pushing Punk off the turnbuckle and onto a table and proposing to just another Stephanie McMahon. It's pretty obvious they had no idea how to progress it and those few weeks that looked like they were building something were just them throwing shit at the wall and buying time until they figured out a plan.
ReplyDeleteNaturally. I guess the question I should have asked is, "Why are those any legitimate reasons for doing it?"
ReplyDeleteThey did a few months ago when they gave her IBS. Be careful what you wish for.
ReplyDeleteThey could have saved it by having him cut a promo acknowledging the fans making fun of him calling him Albert and that they should stop and he commands respect now as Lord Tensai. It would have been a simple fix really.
ReplyDeleteI thought she was acting kinda heelish, but then again they seem to be booking their top faces this way, where it's OK to be a complete dick as long as you're doing it to the heels.
ReplyDeleteOne possible upside to the 3 hours Raws - They may hook in more international viewers to the live show with the earlier start time. Watching Raw from 1am - 4am seemed easier for me than the usual 2-4 slot. Having said that, the show felt like a 2 hour show with more recaps.
ReplyDeleteOr even some meaningful interaction between ADR and Santino if they're going to wrestling on every show for weeks on end?
ReplyDeleteLegit question here: what do people want exactly from Punk? It seems to me that the guy plays 3 characters:
ReplyDelete- over the top dastardly heel (aka SES Punk). This guy is awesome, and one of the best heels from the past 10 years (despite losing a ton, which can be tough).
- babyface Punk (the guy we've had for about 6 months). He's sarcastic, says goofy things on occasion (i.e. snicklefritz), and is a morally right guy like all WWE babyfaces.
- tweener Punk, which it seems is the guy people want to see right now. This is the pipebomb dropping guy from last summer/fall, who leans more to the heel side.
My question is how do you book #3 and sustain it for the long term without him coming off as a whiner? Cause to me that was one of the problems he ran into last year. It worked fine against Cena and Vince, but fell flat against HHH. A lot of the that was HHH's fault IMO, cause he made too many good points and exposed Punk as a whiny bitch. Cena/Vince shut their mouths a lot more and didn't make convincing arguments; they let Punk be in the right.
But then (again IMO) it happened at the beginning of the Johnny Ace/Punk feud, where Punk came off as an unlikeable jerk.
I'm not saying it can't be done, I'm just not sure how you do it without running into dreaded 1997 Bret Hart territory. It's been said a million times, but wrestling fans hate whiners/complainers. And to me, that's what Pipebomb-dropping CM Punk is, especially the longer he goes as the character.
Because that character needs to be proven RIGHT to work. HHH should have sold for him the fact that yeah, he's running things because he married his way into wrestling royalty. But we can never have Trips look bad, so Punk just looked like a paranoid conspiracy guy.
ReplyDeletePunk seemed like a jerk due to WWE failing to build Ace up as anything other then being stroppy mid management. He was constantly overridden by Vince (after he was voted out) , the WWE board (after giving him the chance to run both Smackdown and Raw at Mania) and HHH (despite being removed from running Raw) so he never really seemed like much of a threat. It got even more confusing when he switched to Cena because he went from feuding with CM Punk, a guy that was not conforming and speaking out against the company, to feuding with a guy that constantly talked about how he loved the WWE and the WWE Universe.
ReplyDeleteThunder would own this show.
ReplyDeleteI want over the top dastardly sxs/nexus punk
ReplyDeleteYup she's dead in the water. Whole character is dumped and now she's vickie Guerrero with half the heat. Oh well... :D
ReplyDeleteRip AJ November 2011-August 2012
ReplyDeleteYeah, I mentioned it last week, but I'm honestly perplex by the Tout thing. Are they just not getting their coveted 11-14 year olds(that sounded kinda dirty) to do the videos? Cause man, and I say this as a full grown adult that contemplates buying a wrestling figure every now and then, the WWE isn't breaking any stereotypes with the videos they shown.
ReplyDeleteShartshooter
ReplyDeleteI was hoping AJ would become an infatuated CM Punk fangirl whom he could use to his advantage.
ReplyDeleteCan't wait until week when she books wacky partners punk and cena v show and bryan. LIGHT ME UP
ReplyDeleteGood point, and I guess an example of the pipebomb working is his tearing up of Jerry Lawler, he sold it well by not responding to Punk's accusations. It would take an incredible amount of self confidence to let someone else tear you up with a lot of elements of realism to it, and not respond. Obviously Cena and Vince have that, Lawler has it, but HHH didn't and it fell flat.
ReplyDeleteBut to answer you question, I don't think Pipe Bomb dropping CM Punk is long term sustainable just because of the points you bring up.
Cena did tell Vince he smelled really bad once, I guess.
ReplyDeleteYeah when an angle is in the hands of hhh showing even the slightest weakness its dead in the water.
ReplyDeleteYeah I thought she was acting kind of heelish too, especially when she got up right in the face of the guys.
ReplyDeleteThat's actually a cool idea. Have a heel take themselves out of matches and repeatedly cause the face to lose matches. That way, the face can never get the stereotyped "REVENGED! NOW IT IS I WHO HAVE MADE YOOOOUUUU LOSE!" retaliation. This Idea 2012!
ReplyDeleteI'm giving them 2 more Raws to right the ship.
ReplyDeleteCertainly, there was.
ReplyDeleteJust...the checks weren't as big as they once were. It's a reliable source of income, and I could see Cena not move an ounce of merch if he were to be solidified as a heel.
This is more like the Jesse Baker I know and love.
ReplyDeleteWere they "Lee's"?
ReplyDeleteTry the veal.
Cause they want to be on TV?
ReplyDeleteI would've rather drank a case of Nattie Light and had an evening discussion with Tommy Wiseau and Greg Sestero about "The Room" than watch Raw.
ReplyDeleteI take that back. That actually sounds like an awesome idea.
I am a lifer, and I give them until Wrestlemania 29 to fix it.
ReplyDeleteOtherwise, I'll check out Wrestlemania XXX, but afterwards I would pretty much be done with wrestling. There comes a point where you just get too old for some of this stuff. I'm 28, and I felt like I was watchin
I mean that's true, but consider this, how many kids actually know about that Kobe case in Colorado? Sure we adults know about it, but the kids, not so sure unless they google it. Maybe he gets a suspension instead of being future endeavored (I hope).
ReplyDeleteSkipping Raw is fun, enjoy the summer instead.
ReplyDeleteSomeone remind me when it's time to steal Summerslam.
It's pretty simple - he needs to be the voice for the people that chant "Cena Sucks." It's not rocket science. That was Pipebomb Punk. Say what the traditional/old school fans want to hear.
ReplyDeleteEveryone says Cena is a face - he's not. He's a tweener. When half the arena chants that you suck every night, you're not a face.
It's the Bret Hart situation except in every arena. Half of every crowd are younger, WWEized fans who worship Cena. The other half are people older than 25 that grew up on the Attitude era.
That's the BEAUTY of it. The WWE needs to stop manipulating guys to fit in w/ their perceptions of heel & face. They have 2 distinctly different fanbases at every single show. They should be making a killing off of that dynamic - like at Money in the Bank or Extreme Rules.
A split crowd in wrestling is AWESOME. It's what separates wrestling in 2012 from wrestling in 1992, we make up our own mind. Or, in theory, we should.
Sheamus-Bryan was way better than the tag match.
ReplyDeleteThe stuff on the ramp was good, but once the kendo stick (what the hell was it doing therre??) came out, it sucked.
ReplyDeleteLast comment. Its telling how few paragraphs Scott could write about about a 3 hour show
ReplyDeletewell, Bret Hart still got great (face) reactions all over the world so I guess that a lot of people didn't see him as a whiner but as him having an actual point.
ReplyDeleteabsolutely.
ReplyDeleteit's funny that in a way the last years have been more shades of grey than the attitude era (as soon as Austin kicked off, it was mostly clear heel vs. face). I mean, it's not uncommon for heels like Ziggler or The Miz to get a lot of "babyface heat".
Is TOUT sponsoring Raw and PPVs the way fruity delicious delicious fruity fruity Skittles did ?
ReplyDeleteThis was basically the same length of actual new material as the 2hr show just with an extra hour of commercials and recaps. It was insufferable watching live! There is no way any sane person can sit through these on a weekly basis, maybe Daniel Bryan's insanity was brought on by this and not AJ?
ReplyDeleteI find that Gruden's so bad that he's great.
ReplyDeleteGood point, I know Ziggler is a good heel, and even the Miz is a good heel, for me personally, I find it hard to boo either guy or root against either guy because Ziggler is an awesome performer, and I respect the Miz's dedication to wrestling. Now some people would say they aren't doing their job if people are cheering them, but it's a tough situation...it's tough being a heel these days, unless you're big, you're never really booked to be strong, and if you do show some charisma, a good portion of the audience sees that and cheers for you.
ReplyDeleteI noticed that, too, and laughed hard. Great name.
ReplyDeleteI had the same feeling while watching last night - that Bryan is THERE, and absolutely could carry the show on his shoulders. He's excelled at every single thing he's been asked to do since his first night on "NXT".
ReplyDeleteI think it speaks to the WWE's perception of heels. I mean, what does Ziggler do that is actually 'heelish'? Or take the situation with Punk, now. They have been doing the whole "Why, Punk, Why?" nonsense, but all he did was attack the Rock and defend his ground, so there is no real reason for the fans to turn on him. By making all the heels cowards that never get the upper hand, it is hard to buy them as threat, so all that comes across is their personality and underappreciated talent - they never seem legitimately evil. Compare that to Bobby Roode, who is booked strong, but is arrogant and dishonest enough that he is easy to hate (while still appreciating as an older fan). We know he is a top notch star (he won last year's BFG series and has several legitimate title defenses), but consistently insults his opponents and takes the low road. Ziggler seems more like a loveable loser than any kind of evil person.
ReplyDeleteI was a big Albert/A-Train mark during his first go-round with the company, and was actually really excited when I had read that he had re-signed - I had heard nothing but good things about his time in Japan, and thought the "Lord Tensai" character could be a very unique story of retribution.
ReplyDeleteI still like the guy, and think that he's a very underrated brawler when not forced to remain "stoic" and rigid; his recent matches with Sheamus, for example, were pretty good in terms of two big guys just stiffing the hell out of each other. The character, though, was completely dead on arrival - instead of fleshing out the character by giving him, oh, back-story or context or mic-time, Vince instead decided that it'd be quicker and easier just to give him a cheap Halloween costume, red rubber underwear, and a "follower" that is only there for "vague, mysterious reasons that only they understand".
So, yeah, again, I like the guy, but the company sure isn't doing anything to help him.
I still say Brock/Angle/Show (at "Vengeance, 2003") is absolutely fantastic.
ReplyDeleteYou need to be on TV. Your commitment to this bit is fucking Oscar-worthy.
ReplyDeleteI...I would watch that.
ReplyDelete"I'll prove to you that rape can be funny: Picture Porky Pig raping Elmer Fudd."
ReplyDelete- George Carlin
It can be. It wasn't in this case because it was done by an amateur but I'm sure Louis or someone could make rape hilarious.
ReplyDeletelol... nattie light.
ReplyDeletethat is a great name.
ReplyDeletehe could be a welcomed addition to the BoD
yea but they were taped.
ReplyDeleteBE A STAR GMAJ!!! LIGHT ME UP!!!!
ReplyDeleteI don't mind newbs!
ReplyDeleteI just mind newbs that advocate rape jokes.
Yeah, you guys are nailing points mentioned below...
ReplyDeleteI know, within certain and specific guidelines, it can work.
But like Mick Foley says...."Comedy is hard. It's bad comedy that's easy."
That's it, I'm coming to Seattle for a brainstorming session. We're going to be the schedulers for this WWE Network that will never launch.
ReplyDeleteBit? :oP
ReplyDeleteDidn't you hear? Everything on this blog is a work. The whole internet, in fact.
ReplyDeleteHaha, maybe I should retire VKM, then.
ReplyDeleteMy Niners are MNF twice this year which is the most they've been on in years, so of course I'm excited for that.
ReplyDeleteBut you'll get no arguments from me on the fact SNF got the better games.
The thing about the AW thing is that it doesn't necessarily bother me so much that he said it (I mean, it does, rape jokes are pretty uncool *coughDanielToshcough*) but that it was stupid and just highlighted how little he needs to be there. Titus & Darren were getting over on their own without someone speaking for them, and as I was saying in the live thread, speaking was really all they were good at. Truthfully, no one got offended when they did stereotypical Asian mocking at Yoshi Tatsu, so I don't see why an offhand Kobe joke is twice as bad. I wish they'd turf AW still, but mostly just for the PTPs sake so they can get over on their own and because AW sucks. But they probably won't, they made him apologize on Twitter & stuff so I guess he's in the clear.
ReplyDeleteEverything else was just mountains of crap, although the D-Bry segments were entertaining crap and ADR looked great out there with a little passion in his belly.
I promptly removed WWE RAW & all other wrestling from my scheduled DVR series recordings list.
ReplyDeletePipe Bomb Punk can be a permanent fixture if booked right.
ReplyDeleteLook no further than Austin in 1997. The guy was the world's biggest dick but he was hilarious at it. The attempt at getting a "wheelchair fight" started with Bret after the surgery is still one of the greatest things I have never seen until a couple of nights ago. Keep Punk a dick, but a likable dick who is right. Austin bitches about Shawn relinquishing a title because his knee hurts and then brags about how he's out here wrestling with knee brace on.
Have Punk take the Austin approach and he should be fine.
AW needs to stick around so he could play JJ Dillion to Kofi's Barry Windham and R-Truth's Lex Lugar. Imagine AW telling Kofi, "Your partner cares more about his imaginary friend than about you. Watch, he won't be there when you really need him." The Backstage Fallout video (which allows the undercarders to do interviews, some of those segments they should put on the main show) pretty much shows Kofi being flustered about R-Truth's concern over little Jimmy. Some of the stuff in those backstage videos could add to the angles on television.
ReplyDeleteUgh another season with fuck face at qb. 7-9, here we come.
ReplyDeleteAgreed. I've heard many funny jokes about rape, kid touching, cancer etc. The thing that the wwe doesn't get is that the key to a joke is to be funny.
ReplyDeleteSanford has a day job as a sports guy on NBC here in NYC. Freaked me out when I saw him doing the 6 o clock news last summer when I moved back here.
ReplyDelete"Hey, why do you think they call him Porky?"
ReplyDeleteRARRRRRRGH!
ReplyDeleteWho? Alex Smith?
ReplyDeleteI get the feeling Punk is gonna go back to being a face after this feud is over. His face run has still been drawing good merch sales and, while it hasn't bumped the ratings, hasn't really tanked them either. I think he'll spin out as a face after its over.
ReplyDeleteWhat I hate is that now that he's a heel, his personality is now completely different. A week ago he was a fighting champion who would take on all challengers. Now, by virtue of deciding to attack The Rock, he's now pissed off at being in a match with two guys. It's so fucking stupid and simplistic.
especially since so many people within the company seemed to have put him in the "great in ring worker but couldn't cut a good promoe to save his life"-drawer.
ReplyDeleteI thought it was funny too.. but I could see how it could get the company in trouble, especially when you look at the flack Daniel Tosh got for making a rape joke. Like it or not the WWE is almost always being scrutinized for something.. BUT.. on a positive note, I think this was the BEST appearance to date for this new AW stable and if they don't get punished then this is the direction they need to go in.. brash talk and wins...
ReplyDeleteI'm surprised Cena didn't manage to work "poopy" into his PG rant last night.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I'm wondering how Bret took to Punk saying that Bret was in his hometown a couple of weeks ago (Montreal).