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TNA Impact Thread

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  1. Oh wow the difference between this and the Zone is night and day.

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  2. So sad to see Hulk out there all broken down and shit. At least Bischoff has the good sense to stay off tv(for now...)

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  3. I think they call Kurt cyborg because like most machines he's literally hanging together by just a few screws.

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  4. Is it just me or does TNA's big screen look way more impressive than WWE's.

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  5. Magnus for champ, brother.

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  6. TNA's answer to John Cena, apparently.

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  7. That was my thought as well.

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  8. This is...good?

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  9. Pretty brilliant retcon by Bully.

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  10. Do we really need a scene-by-scene explanation? I'm pretty sure even the the mouth breathing neckbeards in the Impact Zone had this figured out.

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  11. I think it's necessary after the drawn out way it developed.

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  12. "..and I woulda got away wit it if it weren't for you meddling kids and that dog."


    Seriously, that kind of,,,,made sense.

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  13. I'd rather have this convoluted analysis by Bully than WWE's insipid 'I DON'T OWE YOU AN EXPLANATION' crap every time someone turns heel.

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  14. Just bring Homicide back.

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  15. Next Aces turn: Chavo. He'll feel slighted for not being recognized by Hulk.

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  16. Is that a mashup of Roode and Aries' themes?

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  17. Aries is amazing.

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  18. Who wears a sequined tux to a wrestling event let alone a TNA show? I'd be too afraid of some redneck would spill beer on it and I'd lose money on the rental.

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  19. That was a wired place for a commercial break.

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  20. They did for the the specials they taped.

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  21. "SINCE WHEN CAN YOU SEE?!" Aries is god.

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  22. "Since when can you see!?"


    Don't change Austin, just don't change.

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  23. Aries to Hebner: "Since when did you see?"

    Man, Aries is just too awesome.

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  24. Although, in Earl's defense, Ray Charles could have seen those feet on the ropes.

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  25. Anyone else see that spit from Roode flying all the way over and hitting Hernandez?

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  26. That was a nice sequence.

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  27. My god, Aries is insane.

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  28. Tenay is slipping.

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  29. THANK YOU BAD INFLUENCE!

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  30. There is no way on GOD'S green earth that this feud will not be awesome.

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  31. And THAT was a wrestling match.

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  32. For real? Get Konnan and put LAX back together, TNA!

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  33. What's with the Skrillex knockoff?

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  34. NO! X Division isn't about weight limits, it's NO limits.


    Sigh, guess it's time to make sure the X-Div boys stay down.

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  35. At least it's not Generic Rock.

    Did King just throw in a plug for 5 Hour?

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  36. LAX got back together. Dunno if Konnan was there though.

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  37. He has been terrible for awhile now.

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  38. Must be time for the yearly 'we care about the X Divison, honest!' push.

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  39. One wrinkle I'd add to the X title, every match is no DQ, no count outs.

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  40. Can't they at least get some actual high flyers instead of York and Ion

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  41. It was during the tag team tournament PPV. No idea when it will air.

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  42. I liked that when Chavo did the Three Amigos, it was fluid and quick, not slow and plodding like it used to be.

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  43. And I feel the need to explain this one.

    Old X Division was "flexible". It could be an opener, or a main event, whether it was "native" X-Div guys (Styles, Daniels, etc...) or the occassional "visitor" (Abyss, Nash) running the show.

    But now, it seems that the X Division will be relegated to the old "cruiserweight" role. With the limits inherent in such a role.

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  44. No idea why they never went after Pac.

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  45. ...and the crowd goes....lukewarm.

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  46. There was zero build to him and they have botched the X-Division terribly.

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  47. Wait...I'm confused. Every X division match is a triple threat match from now on?

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  48. TNA really needs to work on their entrance themes, King's is awful.

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  49. ...and if you're pinned or you submit then you're out of the title picture.

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  50. "He wrote this song a long time ago, a REAL LONG TIME AGO."

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  51. Me either. He was made for the X Division.

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  52. I thought Dutt was Low-ki for a second.

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  53. Like forever? This seems way too convoluted.

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  54. Extreme rules? That's how I'd go.

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  55. Nah, probably only until everyone else gets cycled through.

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  56. I don't know how long it is. They just announced it at the start of the match but didn't specify.

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  57. "Rest in Peace!!!"




    "I will!!"

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  58. I find it hard to believe that TNA can't make a few phone calls and bring in some luchadores. I don't care if they are flippy flop spot monkeys; they energize the crowd and give us something different.

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  59. LOL I forgot about that part.

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  60. Hmm, that wasn't very good.

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  61. Fenix and Daga can fly. They are insane.

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  62. I'm pretty sure Samuray Del Sol is free.

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  63. So that looked pretty dangerous.

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  64. I still want to know just HOW Dutt hits that double stomp safely. Crazy finisher.

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  65. Very strong first hour.

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  66. I can't believe they haven't got Jack Evans for the X Division yet

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  67. I'm pretty shocked no one has lured Ibushi for a stateside run

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  68. Considering how terrible the X division is right now, I'm starting to believe that the cruiserweights in WCW were just a happy accident.

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  69. That could be the next step. "Rebrand" the X-Division, then start bringing in new guys.

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  70. It's not about weight limits, it's about no limits!

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  71. It WAS about no limits.

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  72. They need to get them on TV.

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  73. D-Von has white ears now?

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  74. 80% off Jeff Jarrett guitars! Also on sale: Instant Classic T-shirts and I Heart Serotonin koozies.

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  75. As long as we're dumping "old stock", just mail me Raisha Saeed. I'll pay COD. ;)

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  76. I thought that too. Maybe it was the guy with the acetylene torch in the package?

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  77. Got anything in there from Planet Jarrett?

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  78. Sorry, dude. She's does like pita being dipped into her hummus.

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  79. "Sorry, dude. She's does like pita being dipped into her hummus."


    I know what you meant, but this is still funny.

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  80. Damn, Hulk. That was kinda cold.

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  81. Hulk is a dick.

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  82. Yeah, I fixed it. I laughed when I first saw it too.

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  83. Pissed off Gail is kinda cool.

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  84. People still rip off Def Leppard?

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  85. The ref shirt looks like body paint.

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  86. Point fir hulk telling sting to.go hang in the rafters! I laughed

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  87. Ain't nothing wrong with that.

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  88. Taryn, DQ GAIL WHEN SHE DOES IT! Dumbass.

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  89. Saw someone below say that TNA has bad entrance themes. Hard to argue that. Dixie should get her buddy Billy Corgan to arrange some new songs.

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  90. Taz: "Obviously this girl needs anger management." Drew McIntyre nods in approval (when Taryn isn't looking).

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  91. Hey, that's Gail Kim IRVINE.

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  92. Gail and Aries? Um, sure, I guess?

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  93. I thought the same thing.

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  94. Even if they "fire" Taryn they should still have a female ref for the Knockouts.

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  95. Haha. Long and hard.

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  96. Then who is Earl going to molest at house shows?

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  97. I just turned on the show a little bit ago and so far I love the classic WCW walkway from the back to the ring.


    Brooke thought "long and hard."

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  98. I prefer Tazz's "She's single" remark. One of the rare times he's been actually funny.

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  99. Are you leaving?

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  100. I've never been a big fan of asian women, but Gail Kim. Man, man, man.

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  101. I thought the good news was going to be that Terrell is going to start doing porn. This is a bit of a letdown.

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  102. ...except Drew McIntyre.

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  103. Taryn's tits are easily the best thing of this segment. But honestly, at least the feud set up makes sense

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  104. There are enough knockouts left for him to fondle after he puts on that "I did it!!" T-shirt and acts like Bret Hart.

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  105. Damn, Brooke stumbling backwards off the ramp would have been AWESOME.

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  106. "You're a sissy!"


    That's why leaving the Impact Zone was worth it.

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  107. "Love ya, honey!!"

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  108. Are you kidding me? Brooke's acting and delivery were inspired!

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  109. I actually enjoyed it and thought that Taryn's tits were just icing on the cake.

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  110. [Bobby Heenan moment] The funny thing is about an hour later you'll wanna fuck her again. [/Bobby Heenan moment]

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  111. Brooke can't even pretend to not notice someone behind her.

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  112. Dear lord... this deserves +1s until next week.

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  113. It's a shame this isn't in the Raw thread because you'd get 20 likes.

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  114. I posted it before the Bully/Brook stuff. That was good.

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  115. They need to get the "Steph betrays Vince" scene out of the way STAT!

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  116. Too bad she's not on RAW.

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  117. I've seen mannequins with more emotion.

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  118. Why, so she can be pinned in 20 seconds via rollup? I'd rather Beth (along with a couple others) showing up on Impact.

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  119. Eh. The bar for acting in women's wrestling hasn't been very high since Mickie/Trish.


    I don't think it was worse than anything involving AJ.

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  120. AJ Lee > Brooke Hogan in any aspect of her life.

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  121. Bully makes a lot of good points, but ugh. Mr. Anderson.

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  122. No argument there, but I just don't mind the story.

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  123. D'Lo turning heel was as big as Coachman turning heel back in the day.

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  124. I'm not watching. Just putting it out there. Not being snarky or anything.

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  125. ... Except a lot of people DID see that last part coming, Bully.

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  126. They REALLY should have played up D-Lo's backstage role more.

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  127. Hemme's forearm tattoo makes it look like she has hairy arms. Dislike.

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  128. Okay Joseph, DO NOT TURN YOUR BACK!

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  129. Don't know about anyone else, but I'm hoping for a Matt Morgan squash.

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  130. Remember when Morgan and Park were doing thumbtack matches? It seems like a decade ago.

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  131. Morgan's lacking some definition in the midsection.

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  132. I dunno. I'm partial to Asian women, but Gail's overdone tan is something of a turnoff.

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  133. Morgan, do ALL of Hogan's AWA/early WWF stuff.


    Body Vise, Axe Bomber, Big Boot, Leg Drop!

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  134. Let me put this out there: I don't usually watch this show, but I feel like I picked a great night because they're recapping the A&8 storyline and it almost makes sense, the guys in the gang look like their stars (even though just following online it sounded like they were scrubs) and I feel like I understand the stakes to the feud.

    So good job, TNA.

    Not sure I'd love it so much if I were sitting in the live crowd, but I'm not, so...

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  135. Park's facial expressions as really good.

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  136. This was taped last week so I don't think the crowd is seeing this.

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  137. Did Park get a hold of Hulk's HOF ring?

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  138. Park's bug eyes are great.

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  139. Most TNA theme music sucks something fierce but Joseph Park's is amazing.

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  140. Morgan's ears are distracting.

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  141. I had to just look it up, Morgan is 36?!

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  142. Did Morgan get rid of the Hellevator? That finish was sick.

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  143. Hey, it's AJ Styles: Lost in Cleveland!

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  144. It's the knockoff "LA Law theme."

    http://youtu.be/DouX9Ubw-Xw

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  145. Evil AJ should use that clothesline as his finisher.


    He should also dress like Evil Ryu from Street Fighter.

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  146. A. J. Styles clothesline is so good, it put his hoodie back on.

    But seriously, that was stiff. Deliciously stiff.

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  147. Well that's just genius.

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  148. OK, never mind. I have it on. Just FYI. And I ....HOLY CRAP! MATT MORGAN FUCKING SUCKS!!

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  149. My next step in booking the Aces v TNA feud would be to have a team of ex-WWFers (Angle, Hardy, Hogan) fail, then have a team of homegrown TNA guys (Samoa Joe, James Storm, AJ Styles) be the ones to save the day.

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  150. Has Kurt been in TNA longer than WWE now?

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  151. This show needs more Lance Hoyt. Or The Naturals.

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  152. Oh okay. I kept seeing the #impactlive hash tag on the screen and assumed it was true. My bad....

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  153. D-Ray 3000 and Shark Boy

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  154. Tenay looks shitfaced

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  155. Tenay doing in-ring interviews? Geez.

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  156. VOO DOO KIN MAFIA

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  157. Sonny Siaki and Amazing Red would be appreciated.

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  158. Why is Gollum interviewing AJ Styles?

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  159. "Don't ever count a creature out."

    Unless they show up blitzed out of their mind at a PPV...

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  160. It'd be great if he kicked Tenay's ass. lol.

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  161. 1000 points for the D-Ray shout out.

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  162. I didn't realize Siaki was retired.

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  163. I assume someone in the back showed Morgan a tape of a Daniel Bryan match and told him he's needs to be more like Bryan, and growing the bears is the best he can do.

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  164. Or at least clothesline him.

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  165. Not a great job showing everybody that Tenay is taller than one of your main eventers.

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  166. "The only thing for sure about AJ is nothing's for sure..."

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  167. Mike Tenay, you must be sacrificed to A.J. Now.


    Oh, and this is too early for the DDP "beats" Hall and Nash moment.

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  168. AJ as a prospect would be awesome.

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  169. Tenay's facial expressions are the worst.

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  170. AJ should wear a "Punisher" T-shirt to add to his look.

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  171. Should've put Taz in there. Nobody's shorter than Taz.

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  172. A.J., DO NOT TURN. Just suckerpunch him again.

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  173. THey've done that throughout AJ's enitre TNA run. When Russo managed him, it was even more noticable.

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  174. Im kinda diggin that aj is playing a character now.

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  175. A 1/5 of Seagrams will do that to you.

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  176. That hoodie should be pulled down more in AJ's face a la Palpatine.

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  177. Damn, that kiboshes Plan A. Plan B: Kick him in the balls. THEN suckerpunch him.

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  178. You didn't enjoy him doing his Charles Robinson impression?

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  179. I don't mind them re-booking 1996.

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  180. AJ needs to grow out his bangs out so he can cover one eye.

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  181. ... or just walk away. I guess that's ok too.

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  182. Why isn't James Storm the star of the company? He should be a bigger deal.

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