Smackdown
Date:
July 26, 2013
Location:
American Bank Center, Corpus Christi, Texas
Commentators:
Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield
Reviewed by Tommy Hall
We're
closing in on Summerslam and the main story on Smackdown is we have
no #1 contender to the title. Orton beat Del Rio clean last week but
wasn't even on Raw to acknowledge the win. Alberto doesn't have any
feud going right now and is just kind of floating around having
random match after random match. Odds are tonight will be spent
building up the Raw matches for the PPV. Let's get to it.
Opening
sequence gets things going.
Randy
Orton vs. Damien Sandow
Sandow
is glad the fans have taken the time off from watching the bug zapper
to be here tonight. He's the uncrowned world champion and we're
welcome for that. Randy elbows him down to start but Sandow grabs a
headlock to slow things down. Some shoulders into the ribs have
Orton in trouble but he sends Sandow into the corner and fires off
right hands to take over. A suplex gets two and Randy stomps on
Sandow's fingers. Damien comes back with a shot to the knee but
Orton throws him out to the floor.
A
drop onto the barricade gets two for Randy but Sandow fires off
shoulder in the corner to get a breather. Orton punches out of the
corner and knocks Sandow to the apron. The Elevated DDT is countered
with a guillotine on the top rope for two as we take a break. Back
with Orton pounding down right hands in the corner but Sandow drapes
him over the top rope for two. We hit a bodyscissors on Orton as we
get an awkward audio edit. The fans sounded like they were chanting
We Want Cody but it almost immediately turned into a Randy chant,
only to go back to the Cody chant a few moments later.
Sandow
hits the Russian legsweep and the Wind-Up Elbow for two before going
back to the bodyscissors. Orton punches his way out and hits the
powerslam but here's Cody for a distraction before the Elevated DDT
can connect. Rhodes picks up the briefcase and walks away with it,
allowing Orton to hit the RKO for the pin at 11:26 shown of 14:26.
Rating:
D+. The match was nothing
special because there was no reason to think Sandow was going to win.
It's the flaw with how WWE books Money in the Bank: they think it's
some magic pill that makes up for months of losses for a guy like
Sandow, but people realize the guy never wins anything. I did some
quick research on this and Sandow has won a total of two matches on
Raw or Smackdown this year. People aren't going to buy him as a
world title contender because he beat Brodus and R-Truth but lost
every other match on the main shows. Why WWE thinks this works is
beyond me but we're stuck with it.
Cody
takes the briefcase with him.
Here's
Punk to an eruption with something to say. Punk says he got what he
wanted with the Best vs. the Beast. Heyman taught him a lot about
being the dirtiest player in the game, including how to go after your
opponent's weak spot and that's exactly what he's going to do to
Lesnar at Summerslam. Lesnar's greatest weakness is trusting Paul
Heyman which is what Punk did for so many years. Paul did help Punk
get to the WWE but it was all for himself.
Heyman
knew that Punk was going to be successful so he put a stamp of
approval on Punk to look like he did something. Paul always wanted
Punk vs. Lesnar but he wanted to be in both corners. At Summerslam,
Punk is going to take everything Heyman has ever wanted and then he's
going to kick Lesnar in the face over and over until there's nothing
left of him. Then there's only going to be Heyman left......and
here's Fandango. He dances to the ring but the beating is on before
anything can be said. Punk puts Fandango to sleep and is left alone
in the ring.
1-800-Fella
ad. It's amusing but can we please give Sheamus something
interesting to do? The guy is talented and over but he gets these
horrible feuds where he's treated like he's invincible which doesn't
do anything for anyone.
Prime
Time Players/Wade Barrett vs. Mark Henry/Usos
So
Henry is a face again just a month after they told us how horrible he
was for lying about his retirement. Such is life in wrestling. Jey
cranks on Darren's arm to start before it's off to Jimmy for some
right hands. Titus breaks up the offense with a cheap shot and it's
off to Barrett for some forearms in the corner.
The
announcers keep us up to date with Royal Family news because that's
what people watch wrestling to hear. Titus comes in for a chinlock
followed by a fall away slam to send Jimmy flying. The Uso comes
back with a kick to the head and it's hot tag to Henry. Everything
breaks down and the World's Strongest Slam ends Titus at 3:29.
Rating:
D+. Quick tag team formula here
with Henry playing the role of house cleaner perfectly. Shield vs.
Henry/Usos should be good stuff if they're given enough time on
Monday but something tells me they'll have to rush through everything
which brings things down. On an unrelated note, why Darren Young
still has a job eludes me.
Alberto
comes in to see Vickie and suggests Vickie should let him pick his
opponent for Summerslam. Vickie gives him a week to think about it
but RVD, Alberto's opponent tonight, comes in to offer himself as an
opponent.
Sandow
is looking for the briefcase and finds Sin Cara, who doesn't look to
be nearly as muscular as I remember him being. Real or imposter,
Cara can't help Damien and the search continues.
Rob
Van Dam vs. Alberto Del Rio
Non-title.
RVD fires off right hands to start but Del Rio bails to the floor to
break the momentum. He stays on the floor for a long time as Cole
makes fun of JBL's title reign. “You held the title for a very
long time without ever winning a match.” JBL: “Watch it.”
Back in and RVD pounds away in the corner but the referee pulls him
back with Del Rio shouting NO MAS. Rob goes after him again but gets
caught by a superkick for the pin at 2:11. Of that 2:11, they made
contact for maybe 40 seconds.
Sandow
is still looking for the case. He comes up on Mark Henry who steps
aside to reveal Booker T. Booker is a big man but Henry literally
blocked him out. Neither will say where Cody is but they agree he's
a thief. Sandow says Booker used to be GM and Henry has to talk Mr.
T. down.
Here's
AJ for the state of her mind address. Before she gets started we get
a clip of Langston nearly kissing her last week. AJ says she's here
to clear the air: she isn't just a nudge away from a breakdown
because of the issues with Kaitlyn and Dolph, although she goes on
for a good while about how horrible Ziggler is. She's just fine
because she's the Divas Champion and will be forever. Just to show
you how fine she is, here are the keys to Ziggler's house. She
planned to use them to break in and burn the place down but here's
Ziggler to interrupt her.
Dolph
says he's passed out thousands of those keys before and the locks
have been changed a few times since her. AJ smiles and has Langston
pull out Dolph's suitcase. Ziggler says everything in the ring right
now is replaceable so AJ pulls out Dolph's wallet. She has a pair of
scissors for some reason but Ziggler says a day at the DMV is a
picnic compared to any time with AJ.
She
cuts up his passport but Dolph says there's a passport agency two
blocks from his house and the girl there owes him a favor because of
something that isn't PG. AJ gets angrier and angrier and throws out
Ziggler's cash. There goes the Visa as the fans tell AJ she's a
psycho. AJ insists she's fine and starts throwing around Dolph's
clothes, only to break down when she sees one of her old shirts.
Dolph
keeps shrugging this off as AJ freaks out more and more. She goes to
the floor and slaps the apron, only to walk into a spear from
Kaitlyn. Langston goes to check on her and gets a Fameasser on the
floor. This was different but I liked it for the most part. Ziggler
shrugging off all the losses made sense given how replaceable all
that stuff was.
Raw
ReBound talks about Bryan's gauntlet match and Cena making the save
post match.
Wyatt
Family vs. Tons of Funk
Bray
is in the rocking chair so this is Luke Harper/Erick Rowan doing the
work. Harper goes right after Tensai to start but everything quickly
breaks down. Brodus is sent to the floor so Rowan can drag Tensai
across the ring by the chin. Harper hits his discus lariat on Tensai
and a splash from Rowan is good for the pin at 1:03.
Post
match Bray says this isn't Tensai's fault and hits Sister Abigail
(spinning downward spiral). Bray says he suspects Kane will be
looking for him but he's not too hard to find. If you need him,
he'll be right here with all his friends. They've been waiting for
Kane and always have been. Still good stuff.
Sandow
comes in to see Vickie but she doesn't know about the case. She says
give it time but Sandow wants it back tonight and storms off.
Christian
vs. Jack Swagger
Before
the match, Colter asks if we're in Texas or north Mexico. The border
agent didn't bother to check Colter's car though because Colter is a
Real American. Swagger takes him to the mat and does push-ups on
Christian's back while shouting WE THE PEOPLE. Back up and Christian
slaps him in the face before firing off right hands in the corner.
Christian backdrops him to the floor and follows up with a pretty
lame plancha. Back in and Swagger runs the ropes for a belly to
belly and we go to a break.
Back
with Christian hitting a middle rope missile dropkick and an uppercut
to the jaw. A high cross misses Swagger but the gutwrench powerbomb
is countered into a failed Killswitch bid. Another powerbomb attempt
is countered into the reverse DDT for two but Swagger comes back with
a kind of belly to belly for two. The Vader Bomb hits knees and
Christian's sunset flip out of the corner gets two. Swagger misses a
charge into the post and the Killswitch is good for the pin at 4:46
shown of 7:46.
Rating:
C-. Nothing to see here.
Swagger has wrestled the same match for years now and this was about
the same thing you would have expected from him. Christian was his
usual smooth self out there but there's nothing new to see here at
all. It wasn't a bad match or anything but it just came and went.
Before
Christian can leave, here's an irate Sandow to continue the search
for his briefcase. As soon as the authorities get here, there's
going to be a warrant issued for Cody's arrest. Vickie needs to fire
Cody for being a thief but before Sandow can keep ranting, Cody pops
up on screen with the case. He's not in the arena but rather in
front of the Gulf of Mexico. If Sandow wants his case back, he can
come get it.
Damien
storms out and goes outside as we take a break. Sandow goes after
Cody but Rhodes threatens to throw the case in the water. Sandow
keeps coming but Cody gets ready to throw it. Damien admits that
Cody is smarter and carried the Scholars. He even has better facial
hair. Cody says Damien has earned this and throws the case in the
water. Damien shrieks and stops dead as Cody leaves. Damien can't
swim so he can't go after the case, but he dives in anyway. He can't
get to it and comes back to land where he cries to end the show.
Overall
Rating: C+. Well that was
different. I'll give them points for focusing on something different
to build the show around, but at the end of the day there's so little
interest in Sandow or the title he can cash in on that it's hard to
get excited. Cody vs. Sandow should be a fun feud but it's not going
anywhere unless Cody wins the case or Del Rio drops the title.
The
rest of the show was entertaining and it was very nice to see the
focus off the traditional stuff. Using Smackdown to develop these
other characters and stories is a great use of the time and far more
interesting than a Raw supplement. Good stuff this week and a
different kind of show.
Results
Randy
Orton b. Damien Sandow – RKO
Mark
Henry/Usos b. Prime Time Players/Wade Barrett – World's Strongest
Slam to O'Neil
Alberto
Del Rio b. Rob Van Dam – Superkick
Wyatt
Family b. Tons of Funk – Splash to Tensai
Christian
b. Jack Swagger – Killswitch
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