Howdy Blog O' Doomers!
Nothing too exciting this week. Should be another interesting show on RAW as the company's only two storylines of note right now will continue to progress.
I agree with our Smackdown guy, Thomas Hall, when he says that it would be nice for Daniel Bryan to have a few bright moments tonight since he's been left laying for the last three shows. I get where they are going but at a certain point if you make Bryan too much of a plucky underdog and don't have an immediate PPV payoff the whole angle goes sour. If they want to drag his chase out to the Survivor Series or even farther they have to at least make it look like he's on even ground.
I'm also curious at how much people will buy into this Orton reign. Looking at his divorce records he's making about 2-3 million/year so there's a major investment in this guy and this might be the time where they are looking to see if he can really draw some money. I understand the point that, for the most part, the WWE machine is the money draw, but the top guys have to bring some of the goods to the table for the machine to move.
Otherwise I'm hoping Punk can carry a really good match out of Curtis Axel and maybe Dolph Ziggler won't be booked to look like a weakling.
That being said, enjoy the show and come out swinging but, like always, keep it clean.
Nothing too exciting this week. Should be another interesting show on RAW as the company's only two storylines of note right now will continue to progress.
I agree with our Smackdown guy, Thomas Hall, when he says that it would be nice for Daniel Bryan to have a few bright moments tonight since he's been left laying for the last three shows. I get where they are going but at a certain point if you make Bryan too much of a plucky underdog and don't have an immediate PPV payoff the whole angle goes sour. If they want to drag his chase out to the Survivor Series or even farther they have to at least make it look like he's on even ground.
I'm also curious at how much people will buy into this Orton reign. Looking at his divorce records he's making about 2-3 million/year so there's a major investment in this guy and this might be the time where they are looking to see if he can really draw some money. I understand the point that, for the most part, the WWE machine is the money draw, but the top guys have to bring some of the goods to the table for the machine to move.
Otherwise I'm hoping Punk can carry a really good match out of Curtis Axel and maybe Dolph Ziggler won't be booked to look like a weakling.
That being said, enjoy the show and come out swinging but, like always, keep it clean.
I'm thinking they do this crazy thing where they match Bryan up with a quality opponent, he has a great match and wins. Nah, that's too simple. Needs a dance-off.
ReplyDeleteYou sir,are a genius.
ReplyDeletePre-show Topic: a.k.a. the "Why are we on YouTube and not on the main show?" special:
ReplyDeleteBlog of Doomers, guests, friends: what was your finest hour?
When - as mission commander - I helped guide Apollo 13 safely back to earth, achieving reentry despite damage to the heat shield.
ReplyDeleteI killed general Zod( that was actually me in the film,Zack later did a CGI
ReplyDeleteswitch)
Since we all want to remember how great RAW used to be back in the day, I suggest we all watch US Open tennis instead to simulate how RAW was preempted in the glory days.
ReplyDeleteSo who watched Miley Cyrus twerk all over the place last night?
ReplyDeleteThe idea is a solid B+
ReplyDeleteuhh? tell me more about that sir?
ReplyDeleteAll I saw was a careless 20-year-old girl wantonly break her father's achy breaky heart.
ReplyDeleteYou don't have to go far, it's all everyone is talking about.
ReplyDeleteIt's on Yahoo's homepage for starters.....
show me the link.
ReplyDeletePeople are saying she's just going for shock like Madonna and Gaga in the past, but with them at least there was something "artsy" attempted. This is just a sad little girl sticking out her tongue and acting naughty.
ReplyDeletewww.yahoo.com.or try that new fangled thing called a search engine.
ReplyDeletesaw it,hilarious!
ReplyDeleteHere's the link in case anyone else feels like seeing why America suddenly got its tits in a bunch over a girl dancing around in her underwear:
ReplyDeletehttp://www.mtv.com/videos/misc/942064/we-cant-stop-blurred-lines-give-it-2-u-medley.jhtml#id=1712596
former Female Disney star reaches young adulthood and sluts it up in order to shed her G image? yawn. I've seen it twice already. Britney and Christina at least had catchy tunes.
ReplyDeleteI get the marketing idea behind it, she's trying hard to get away from the Disney girly girl image so she can expand to a larger more adult audience, and for the most part it works, she's more relevant now that she's ever been, but better and more talented artists have managed to do that without alienating a large part of her fanbase and without looking like a fool. I mean cutting the hair short (despite her large teeth) was an unfortunate but striking idea, the skimpy clothes and the grills on her teeth...again unfortunate but the idea got across, but after last night you can smell the desperation on her (among other things I'm sure) she's trying so hard she's coming across as that kid we knew in school that wanted to be cool so bad he did something incredibly extreme and stupid in order to overcompensate for it.
ReplyDeleteAll of this would be a moot point if she actually looked hot as hell, would give me some fap time, but like i said, huge teeth, short hair and her sticking her tongue out....makes her look weird, and not in that guilty pleasure weird hot thing that gaga has on good days, but just weird full stop.
End rant.
Interesting take. I've never found her really that attractive but you make a lot of sense, it definitely seems like she's trying WAY too hard.
ReplyDeleteShe looks like Justin Bieber with red lipstick and boobies.
ReplyDeleteI like your take but as far as I know the Hannah Montana thing didn't follow her prior to this, if anything, this was completely unnecessary seeing as people already saw her as "former Disney star".
ReplyDeleteYeah pretty much.
ReplyDeleteWhen I killed all the dinosaurs by bodyslamming the asteroid sized Andre the Giant Caveman at PrehistoricMania 3. Brother.
ReplyDeleteWell that being said, another person who featured heavily last night was Justin Timberlake, heres a guy who did it right. From curly haired boy band star to genuine acclaimed music megastar. That was a transition made out of a god's honest change from genres and the quality improved. I couldn't tell you a Miley song on the radio...they all seem to try and copy Rihanna or Lady gaga.
ReplyDeleteI remember when Britney came out at one of those VMA's at did her new song with a god damned snake! and her song was all laced with slow beats and sex, and she was one inch away from tentacle rape styled snake loving on screen. That was cool, that was a new britney and my 15 year old self was kept preoccupied enough for a couple of nights.
ReplyDeleteDecent article that was plastered on my facebook wall this morning.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.buzzfeed.com/mjs538/what-miley-cyrus-was-trying-to-do-at-the-vmas-vs-what-miley
Basically she was trying to do the exact same thing Britney, Christina and others have done before. There's nothing wrong with that; most people knew that even if you didn't know how shameless the ripoff was. The problem was the execution. I don't think anyone on earth thought she came across as sexy, talented or artistic. You can blow 1 of 3 even if it's the big one (Vanessa Carlton blew sexy so hard she retreated out of the pop circle but still had a good career; Michelle Branch blew sexy so hard she became a country star--still worked out for her too). Occasionally you can blow 2 of 3 (it really helps if you nail sexy on this one).
But if you blow 3 of 3 you're the joke of the internet.
Bored waiting for Raw to start, so I've decided to engage in the thankless enterprise of limericks:
ReplyDeleteWhat Triple H wanted to do
Was go over the midcard anew
So he put on his tights
But he stared at the lights
And complained, "That was only a two!"
I realize I spend too much time trying to make certain the cadence was sound, and not enough time making certain the damn thing made sense.
ReplyDeleteI do my job really half-assed, is what I'm saying. That's the American way!
There once was a YES from the YES!
ReplyDeleteWho's YES was a YES on the YES!
He went into YES!
His YES made a YES!
YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES!
MTV VMAs 2013: I Bet You Forgot It Was 1999
ReplyDeleteTimberlake had genuine talent both musically and a talent for making the right friends and pushing away the wrong ones. The "cry me a river" song he made about Britney basically ruined her life and catapulted him into super stardom. His career could have EASILY gone the other way if he didn't already have the gravitas to pull that off.
ReplyDeleteVery few people have that kind of talent or people skills. I begrudge that man nothing, he played the game very well.
JT had good people around him and times were much different back then in terms of superstardom.
ReplyDeleteYeah I couldn't understand that. It seemed like they were trying to appeal to people my age instead of teens. Then again everyone at work all watched it or knew what was going on (actual watercooler topic this morning: did Taylor Swift tell Harry Styles to STFU on camera). So maybe MTV knew what they were doing.
ReplyDeleteThere once was a guy named Delirious
ReplyDeleteWho, in developmental, was weariest
Because each afternoon
He heard the ghost of Monsoon
Telling Brain, "WILL YOU BE SERIOUS?!"
Why is the crowd cheering?
ReplyDeleteRollins and Reigns, doing the over-the-shoulder look for their World Tag Team Pennies.
ReplyDeleteThere once was a wrestler named Punk
ReplyDeletewho lost to a UFC lunk,
Curtis Axel came in
dispatched by Heyman
and promptly got kicked in the junk
The Game uh
ReplyDeleteTHUNDEROUS pop for Triple H!
ReplyDeleteWhy are these idiots cheering for him?
ReplyDeleteIt's the problem with trying to turn a high-level star. Hunter is a legend now, so he's always going to get a pop when his music hits. It's why WWE refused to oblige Flair in later years when he pleaded to be turned heel. No one's going to boo a legend. Well, at least not until we get to the inevitable, 20-minute, "there's only one diamond in THIS BUSINESS" promo.
ReplyDeleteI'm actually interested in hearing what Triple H has to say, so clearly he's going to try to exploit that for 25 minutes.
ReplyDeleteHellooooooo BODers. :-)
ReplyDeleteDammit. I thought he was going to take us back to when he drugged and married Stephanie McMahon.
ReplyDeleteDon't forget raped!
ReplyDeleteRandom thought: The WWE doesn't like it when two guys are walking around with magic briefcases. So why do they have two matches with magic briefcases on the same night?
ReplyDeleteTwo recaps inside the first three minutes.
ReplyDeleteThis certainly portends a worthwhile evening.
I dig Trips using his King of Kings-theme. Gotta change what the crowd is conditioned to cheer. Didn't work tonight, but I appreciate the effort.
ReplyDeleteI'm pretty sure it was established in the storyline she was in on it the whole time.
ReplyDeleteI was wondering about that; he did the same at the PPV. Does he use that one when he's not actually wrestling? Or is there no recognizable pattern?
ReplyDeleteIt didn't work because it has the same opening riff as "The Game."
ReplyDeleteThey need to go full Austin heel turn and just give him the shittiest, most generic doucherock they can find.
Because he's finally a heel again and they're happy about it?
ReplyDeleteI'm not *SAYING* that's the reason, just suggesting that it is.
Most people think it was when I took down twin Jamaican drug lords but I think it was when I woke up from a coma and my nurse, Kelly lebrock, helped me get my revenge.
ReplyDeleteThere once was a wrestler named Bryan,
ReplyDeleteFan favorite? There's no denyin'
Call him weird
Just like at his beard
Got a heart just like a lion
the Linda McMahon Wrestlemania 10-13 theme.
ReplyDeleteMumford and Sons it is!!
ReplyDeleteHHH: Not a businessman, he's a business, man.
ReplyDeleteThe Shield could not have a better name for the new role their playing. I love when stuff works out that way.
ReplyDeleteTrips mentioned ratings.
ReplyDeleteBoD OVERLOAD.
What you deserve... BATMAN!
ReplyDeleteThey already use enough Nickelback songs.
ReplyDeleteCalm down, everyone. it's a storyline.
ReplyDeleteI didn't find storylines about ratings compelling when they did it on The Newsroom, and I couldn't possibly give a sizzling shit about it now.
ReplyDelete"What you deserve" Shoot comments that aren't sup......
ReplyDeleteDoes someone here heard about the Lobo redesign,just awful.
ReplyDeleteRematch Clause: Because Creative Needs A Month Off from Booking the Main Event Program
ReplyDeleteA sizzling shit? Christ. Thanks for the visual. I'll be carrying that one around for awhile.
ReplyDeleteIf Orton was turning heel, I new theme would of been nice.
ReplyDeleteMark Question: We all agree Ol' Daniel is gonna need some back-up, right?
ReplyDeleteThis angle is distressingly inside for my taste. I get what they're going after here, but I don't need to be reminded of the inner workings of the business or the 'face' of the company talk. Pushing the same stale talent is hardly 'new life'.
ReplyDeleteThe best part is that it'll be the third version so far in the New 52. I love reboots of reboots of reboots. Because the New 52 has all been so well-considered and thought out by DiDio, Lee, Harras, and Johns; nothing to see here!
ReplyDeleteSlayer-angel of death,nuff said.
ReplyDeleteNah. They'll probably give him some, but I don't know that it's necessary.
ReplyDeleteNot douchey enough.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure that Cadillac won't be damaged tonight.
ReplyDeleteThe Escalade already has better, more memorable music than Wade Barrett.
ReplyDeleteThe car gets entrance music. Hilarious.
ReplyDeleteI'm going to be mightily impressed when DB smashes that car over Orton's head
ReplyDeleteThe Cadillac has always meant a lot to old school guys in the business.
ReplyDeleteWait...why does the Escalade get HHH's normal entrance music?
ReplyDeleteDoes the car make it out alive by the end of the show?
ReplyDeleteI'm sure Kofi is giving D-Bry some tips.
ReplyDeleteI blame harras for this shit,the only to fix this is killing the pretty boy Lobo and the OG Lobo doing everything in his destruction.
ReplyDeleteMy problem is that I honestly don't see a way where Bryan wins this feud. Which kind of renders the entire enterprise futile, in some ways.
ReplyDelete"The long-term face of the WWE is me."
ReplyDeleteUntil the next cup test.
William Regal needs to come out and resurrect this character and become Bryan's manager.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lcb8RoxQPD0
He might as well have given him a shiny new trophy to celebrate his ratings success.
ReplyDeleteAnd not only that but Motorhead are actually IN THE CAR and will play HHH's theme anywhere he drives.
ReplyDeleteMr.Brownstone-guns n' roses
ReplyDeleteI'm in favor of Regal on my TV.
ReplyDeleteTo the car: You're gonna get your fuckin' hood kicked in.
ReplyDelete*CLAP CLAPCLAPCLAP CLAPCLAPCLAP CLAPCLAP CLAPCLAP*
I'm holding out hope that they pull it off.
ReplyDeleteNow you got a stew going.
ReplyDeleteI agree that Harras is primarily responsible for the editorial chaos at DC, but who hired him, and continues to employ him? DiDio and Lee. And if they won't do anything about it, the buck stops with Diane Nelson.
ReplyDeleteI'm not even going to look...is it the promo about Eugene when he calls HHH "sunshine"?
ReplyDelete"Who would win in a fight between God & Lemmy?"
ReplyDeleteYes. Top 10 promo of all time.
ReplyDeleteOrton loves brownstone.
ReplyDeleteThe main looks like a bitch.
ReplyDeleteIt's friggin' up there. He could still be a major player if they gave him time. He knows how to get storylines across to the audience.
ReplyDeleteJohn Cena is the new Poochie. Even when he's not on-screen the characters should still be talking about him!
ReplyDeleteLLOL Nice.
ReplyDeleteRegal, Bryan. and HHH all have history together so it would make sense.
ReplyDeleteCena threats everyone or there families will die.
ReplyDeleteI DON'T CARE ABOUT BUSINESS SOMEONE KICK SOMEONE IN THE FACE!~
ReplyDelete"Who thumbs his rather large nose."
ReplyDeleteOh, TAG!
There once was a wrestler named Chris
ReplyDeleteA diving headbutt never he would miss
Then one day he came home
Took the cord of his phone
And the last sound his kid made was hssssssss
There once was a douchebag named Randy
ReplyDeletewhose tats I cannot stand-e
Made a big deal
When he turned heel
Stole the belt like it was candy
Crowd: Yes! We love you, Daniel!
ReplyDeleteVince: What, wait? No! We can't have that! Have Bryan endorse John Cena!
Bryan: But I thought-
Vince: DO IT.
Bryan: Thank you John Cena.
Crowd: (Flatlines)
Too clever. We'll get ham-handed soap opera storylines instead
ReplyDeleteI'd love to read a WWE-approved novel set in this alternate history where Hunter was a rebel.
ReplyDelete"YES! YES! YES! YES!"
ReplyDelete"I TOLD YOU, MONSOON!"
"What was that, Brain?"
"Sorry, force of habit."
Lemmy.
ReplyDeletePlease let there be a Pinnocchio burn about Hunter's nose on the way.
ReplyDeleteI'd laugh if Disney sues the shit out of him
ReplyDeleteWow, HHH is such a dick.....nicely done.
ReplyDeleteUh oh, he got downgraded to a B.
ReplyDeleteA SOLID B, HUNTER
ReplyDeleteCmon down voters...that's fucking gold
ReplyDeleteThree Daniel Bryan matches?! And one is against Rollins?
ReplyDeleteI love you, Triple H.
Daniel Bryan v. Seth Rollins.... oh it's a guantlet match. Book it for 40 minutes guys.
ReplyDeleteNot a bad opening segment, but everything was repeated from last week.
ReplyDeleteAnother 45 minutes of DBry. Nice
ReplyDeleteWWE: "You want Daniel Bryan kept strong? Okay! We'll do it on the backs of The Shield!"
ReplyDeleteThat was awesome
ReplyDeleteTrips needs the belt, it would make the angle better. Orton could be anyone.
ReplyDeleteAT BEST.
ReplyDeletecorporation 2.0 HHH,Shield,orton,Cesaro,good idea?
ReplyDelete"Trick question, asswipe. Lemmy IS God!"
ReplyDelete- Airheads
Kinda gave away the finish to the first two matches.
ReplyDeleteHHH, Orton, Shield, Ryback.
ReplyDeleteCesaro could easily be a good henchman who gets fed up and eventually turns. He's got the Statham look to him, too. Badass in a suit
ReplyDeleteA rare film where sandler is funny.
ReplyDeleteIt may have been more effective to have Daniel Bryan make his challenge to Randy Orton AFTER the Shield gauntlet announcement so as to not stand there gawking while Hunter rambles.
ReplyDeleteNot sure I like the Shield as HHH's lapdogs. They felt more effective as maverick wild cards.
ReplyDeleteThat's kind of par for the course when hhh is in the main angle
ReplyDeleteNot to get all Russo in this, but if they really want to get enough mileage out of this, it needs another wrinkle...HHH meaning what he says and is subversively trying to build up DB, Orton turning on HHH and a free for all of sorts, just something other than HHH being all cute with insider bs
ReplyDeleteShould be good.
ReplyDeleteRollins / Bryan will be great, Bryan/Ambrose could be great if they let them get a bit brutal and violent, since that's what Ambrose excels at. And Bryan can prolly even carry Reigns to a decent enough contest.
ReplyDeleteWWE should just ditch all pretense and replace options "A" and "B" with "We'll kick a puppy" and "An Al Snow match"
ReplyDeleteThere is no cute insider bs. It's everyday 9-5 bullshit that everyone has to deal with.
ReplyDeleteI vote B.
ReplyDeleteAn announcer named Jerry Lawler
ReplyDeleteWas surely not a scholar
Oh what a nerve
To call him a perv
But the young girls make him hollerLeave a message...
the others are click(guilty pleasure),punch drunk love and funny people.
ReplyDeleteWWE: "Everyone is going to vote for Heyman to be banned from ringside! Obviously!"
ReplyDelete*Heyman voted to get in the ring with Punk*
WWE: "Well, fuck."
They were Punk & Heyman's lap dogs first...
ReplyDeleteAd break topic #1
ReplyDeleteWhat movie/videogame/book/album, etc. do you feel is unfairly maligned?
I thought all three were OK. I actually like Happy Gilmore and Waterboy. Or, at least I did. Not sure how well they'd hold up...it's been awhile.
ReplyDeleteGOD HAND(ps2) one of the best games of all time
ReplyDeleteMost recently, Man of Steel.
ReplyDeleteI pick Mass Effect 3. Yes, the ending is absolute balls, and an insult to all the effort put into the three games. But up until that last half hour, the game is pretty fucking remarkable.
ReplyDeleteKevin Smith's Jersey Girl. I really love that film.
ReplyDeletejust a crazy beat'em up homage.
ReplyDeleteBoD'ers pause as they look up the word "maligned"
ReplyDeleteBatman Forever.
ReplyDeleteBatman and Robin was a piece of shit, but the one before it wasn't bad. Carrey/Kilmer had a good dynamic.
Iron man 3
ReplyDeleteAlmost missed the opening, but luckily think I only missed Triple H's intro music. BFs birthday today, got to have Cheesecake Factory. Was so good!
ReplyDeleteYep, died in the stink of Gigli
ReplyDeleteThey have no idea how to book a World title feud without them going at it every week on tv.
ReplyDeleteEs una lina mala?
ReplyDeleteWell, at least he's acknowledging his briefcase looks delicious.
ReplyDeleteJerry the King had a cold
ReplyDelete"Go see a doctor," he's told
Doc's intern was hot,
King kept his hands off
At 18, for King, she's too old.
You could have stayed longer...they will recap everything anyway
ReplyDeleteRed state was also pretty good.
ReplyDeleteThat was maligned? I thought it was pretty good. Better than 2.
ReplyDeleteOnly by the vocal minority, if i recall it's one of the highest rated games of last year.
ReplyDeleteSi
ReplyDeleteYeah, that's a rough ride, but effective. I didn't think it was trashed like Jersey Girl was though.
ReplyDeleteTotally agree with that
ReplyDeleteThe 12 people who actually read Iron Man comics back in the day hated it.
ReplyDeleteIn Utero.
ReplyDeleteGets compared to Nevermind way too much and gets flak for not being "mainstream" enough.
A lot of people hated the mandarin twist,especially HQ'S fans
ReplyDeleteNot like I rushed out or anything :P Traffic was just better than I expected.
ReplyDeleteCody Rhodes needs a gimmick.
ReplyDeleteA bit of a topical choice considering his recent casting, but I recently caught the director's cut of Daredevil and it's a much much better film, and I fear the theatrical cut has pushed people away from watching it, because it really is worth the watch.
ReplyDeleteOK, Miz as Fandango is officially the most obnoxious thing of all time. Well done.
ReplyDeleteI read and loved the twist.
ReplyDeleteI kinda laughed my ass off.
ReplyDeleteThe Miz: innovating in the field of Toolery
ReplyDeleteLIked that too.
ReplyDeleteThat was the closest we've come to a heel beat down on Raw in months.
ReplyDeleteTag match, playa!
ReplyDelete..and our first Miley reference has been made.
ReplyDeleteMaddox: WhoawhoawhoawhoawhoawhoawhoaWHOOOOAAAA!
ReplyDeleteVenkman: Nice shootin', Tex!
Oh that film was slaughtered, it was quite sad as well because I know so many people who genuinely love that film and people who hate it. It's probably one of the most divisive blockbusters in recent memory.
ReplyDeleteDo I smell a lame tag team match??
ReplyDeleteThat was literally the greatest thing Miz has ever done.
ReplyDeleteGuy jobs to his own music.... check.
ReplyDeleteTwo shitty twitter/app polls.... check.
And now Brad Maddox is going to do a Teddy Long IMPERSONATION!
We're in for a sucky night.
Fandango seems to exist for no other reason than to provide WWE with a weekly context for their two favorite finishes: the heel makes like Christian and Bales on the match; and the entrance music distraction finish.
ReplyDeleteAng lee's hulk
ReplyDeleteMaddox is brilliant. He's different...
ReplyDeleteAND he semi-mocked Teddy Long in the process. Well done.
Easiest earned upvote of all time.
ReplyDeleteYou mean since the end of last week's show?
ReplyDeleteHe has a career after a career in the Ron Simmons role doing that dance whenever a backstage interview needs an out for a finish.
ReplyDeleteWhere is our ad break questionarium?
ReplyDeleteThis is now.... A TAG TEAM MATCH, playa!
ReplyDeleteAd break topic #2
ReplyDeleteWhat's the last movie you saw in theaters, and what did you think of it?
I, for one, am happy to see Rosa again.
ReplyDeleteYeah....I can't agree there. That was horrid. So horrid that I kind of blocked it from memory. I would go a year or two without seeing it, decide it couldn't have been that bad, watch it, and be reminded that yes....yes, it was.
ReplyDeleteHulk dogs? C'mon now.
But, as with everything, it's all just opinion.
Riding the coattails of Miz Girl for a week was pretty great, too.
ReplyDelete