The PG Era Recap: Raw, 10-28-13

When last we left our heroes, one of them had made a triumphant return; another had destroyed an overmatched nemesis; and the third found himself robbed. Who deserved what? Did Daniel Bryan's actions cause him to lose the title that was his? Is John Cena's fourteenth title reign a sign of more future dominance? And what of CM Punk's future, now that the Dangerous Alliance lies in tatters behind him?

The pre-show commercial promises talking from Shawn Michaels and John Cena.

- The PG-Era Rant for Monday Night Raw, October 28, 2013.

- Live from Orlando, Florida, which just seems appropriate for some reason.

- Your hosts are who you thought they were.

- Opening stills show CM Punk beating the living heck out of Paul Heyman and the controversial main event.

- But first, we will have a Punk/Ryback rematch, which is a WWE App match.

- The Champ Is Here! All this pink on red in the entranceway is messing with the satellite feed. Cena acknowledges that the mixed reactions didn't go away. Cena: “Y'all miss me?” Crowd: “YES!/NO!” Cena calls aside a special thank you to JBL for being the biggest skeptic of the bunch. He imitates JBL (doing a generic Texan accent, and not a very good one), then says it was all motivation for him. And now he's the champ. And from the sound of it, he doesn't plan on going anywhere. He promises that being World Champion means he'll be on SmackDown as well as Raw, and he'll be making the trip to Europe to take part in matches. He then brings up Orton's celebration for later. He knows there will be talking, so he'll be quiet. He thanks Alberto Del Rio for a great match and he knows they will have a rematch, and Cena is ready for it. But just as we end this feel-good segment, here comes Damien Sandow, dressed for action and with the briefcase – but no referee and with a microphone. Sandow: “The UNCROWNED Champ Is Here!” Sandow isn't fooled; he knows that tricep can't POSSIBLY be healed, especially after what Del Rio did. Cena's just talking because he's afraid of a cash-in by Sandow. Sandow reminds us of the briefcase's power, and he's CASHING IN... just kidding. Crowd boos the tease. Cena was ready for him anyway. Sandow then attacks Cena with a briefcase to the arm repeatedly. Crowd wants to see it happen. He wraps the arm around the ringpost, then throws him into the barricade (“RISE ABOVE THIS!”). Sandow's clearly thinking about it. But first, the steel steps. He separates the steps and gets a chair. He pins the arm to the steps and smashes the arm with the chair. Sandow: “My time is now!” It's happening! (Alarm bells are going off because we go to commercial.)

- Money in the Bank Cash-In, World Championship: John Cena v. Damien Sandow. Cena fends off Sandow and hides his arm, fighting with just his right arm, but Sandow finds the wing and does the arm-breaker for two. Sandow throws Cena into the post and cradles him for two. He works the arm some more with knees and a legdrop. Crowd is divded between Sandow as a coward and a new champion being crowned. Sandow with another two, and into an elbowlock and overhead hammerlock. Cena reverses to a Greco-Roman suplex. Sandow with an armdrag on the bad arm and more knees. Sandow wraps the arm around the ropes and adds elbows to Cena's gut. Snap suplex by Sandow gets two. Back to the hammerlock. The Twitter Ticker is divided. Sandow works Cena over in the ropes, but puts his head down and regrets it. Cena with a backdrop to a double KO as we go back to break. Only three minutes in? Man, they're milking it. We return mid-slugfest, with Cena using the bad arm for his shoulder tackle. Both men are down again, and Sandow attacks only to get a big boot and twist slam. But Cena's arm is bothered so much he can't follow up. Sandow attacks the bad arm during Cena's taunt and gets a flip neckbreaker for two. Sandow whips Cena's arm into the turnbuckle. They show the WWE doctor in concern as Sandow keeps attacking the arm. Cena does the AA (sort of – there's no oomph to it) and Sandow bails. The doctor checks on Cena, who waves him off. Cena tells the referee to stop the countout and chases Sandow, slowly rolling him in and putting on the STF with one arm. Sandow easily breaks (of course) and hits the Terminus for two. Crowd is on every near-fall right now. Sandow switches to a full nelson, but Sandow reverses to a flying neckbreaker of some sort for two. Cena adjusts the brace as they get up, but Sandow with the Crossface! Cena escapes it and tries the STF, but Sandow avoids it. AA is slipped out of, and the full nelson slam gets two. Sandow puts Cena up top as the crowd says THIS IS AWESOME (Oh yes!) and tries a superplex, but Cena fights his way out with headbutts. Sandow collapses on the mat, but Cena's crossbody airballs and Cena is hurt on his knee from the bad landing. Sandow loads up a piledriver, but Cena reverses to the AA and Sandow has FAILED at 13:14. Well... I'm sure the Blog hated this. But seriously, Sandow was a dud as Money in the Bank holder. Remember, he was only given the briefcase to turn Cody Rhodes face, which is a lousy reason, and he never caught on as future World Champion. It's no loss. ***1/2 Sandow looks devastated.

- Meanwhile, the Shield. We find out that Ambrose/Langston is rematching tonight. Ambrose admits that Langston's on the rise, but says Langston was privileged for having a match. They won't make the mistake of underestimating Langston. Rollins promises to get back to basics. Ambrose makes a point that he's the only Shield title holder, and Rollins and Reigns seem not to be happy with that. But he's the baddest man there is, so he'll retain.

- Hey, get the WWE App and choose a stipulation! And at least Street Fight, Falls Count Anywhere, and Tables are moderately different.

- United States Championship: Dean Ambrose v. Big E Langston. Cole recaps the actions of last night, focusing on the double-juice when their heads collide. Langston fires off on Ambrose early, but rns into the knees and Ambrose clotehslines Langston. Punches follow, and Ambrose gets a quick one. Ambrose boxes Langston in the corner and works on the eyes. Swinging neckbreaker gets one again. Ambrose stomps away and yells at Langston, which is a mistake because Langston fires back. Ambrose cuts off momentum only to get clotheslined. Langston puts his head down, but Ambrose just runs into a belly-to-belly suplex. Reigns low bridges on the Ultimate Splash and the referee calls a quick DQ at 1:43. The Shield go into triple-team mode, and here come the Usos for the save and clear the ring. And here comes Brad Maddox. HOLLA! (takes drink)

- Big E Langston and the Usos v. The Shield. Joined in progress as Reigns works over Jimmy and tags in Ambrose. Ambrose stomps away on Jimmy's hand and lands punches and a suplex. Rollins in, continuing the attack. Jimmy fights out, but Rollins knocks him back down HARD for two. Reigns in, and he lands a jumping elbow for two. Reigns drags Jimmy to the corner, and Ambrose follows with big stomps and boxing in the ropes. Running dropkick follows, getting two. Ambrose hooks his sleeper as we learn Big Show is not here tonight and Shawn Michaels will be next. Jimmy with a jawbreaker and Dragon Whip kick to Jimmy that staggers Ambrose. Ambrose dizzily tags in Reigns, who leaps straight into a DDT. Hot tag Jey, who ducks and dodges everyone and beats down Rollins with a gut kick and throat thrust. Spinebuster follows, and Rollins eats the hip check for two, Ambrose saves. Langston in, and they go flying with a Cactus clothesline. Rollins catches Jey and puts him up top, but Jey throws him down with a front superplex. Superfly splash hits the knees, and Reigns is in. Double suplex try, but one Uso catches the other and the Usos get a double kick on Rollins. Reigns spears BOTH USOS and win at 5:30 shown. Well, that was a fun finish at the very least. **

- And now, Shawn Michaels comes out, still looking conflicted. No overblown entrance for him, but he still has fans. JBL says Shawn owes no explanation because he can do whatever the heck he wants. Shawn knows he needs to explain, not just to the fans but to Danel Bryan. So he asks Bryan to come out so they can talk. Bryan's angry face needs work. Shawn says he never meant for it to happen. He says he called the match down the middle, but the fans say he sold out. Shawn says he reacted because of what Bryan did to HHH. He chose to retaliate because his best friend was knocked out, and their friendship will mean more than anything else in wrestling. Shawn gives HHH credit for pulling him out of his darkest moments, so he pulled HHH out. Shawn isn't asking Bryan to be okay with it. He just wants Bryan to accept an apology. Shawn offers his hand (Crowd: “NO!”), but Bryan refuses. Shawn admits that Bryan has become better than Shawn even thought he could. But last night, Shawn gave Bryan the last, best lesson: don't trust anyone. This lesson isn't going over well. Is the crowd chanting You Still Got It? He says the respect he's showing deserves a handshake, but again Bryan says no. Bryan is getting more over without saying a word. Shawn then goes into angry mode, saying he stuck up for Bryan every step of the way. He doesn't know or care about Bryan's status, but he's SHAWN MICHAELS and that should be enough to earn the handshake. Shawn's heel turn here is greatness. There's a Jericho/Malenko vibe. They do shake hands... and Bryan pulls Shawn straight into the Yes Lock! Michaels finally taps out, but Bryan won't let go. Crowd INSTANTLY begins a You Tapped Out chant. Cole says Bryan finally snapped as JBL keeps yelling whatever he says. Replays make it clear that Shawn taps. This may be Bryan's Stone Cold moment – and ironically, it's ALSO against Shawn Michaels.

- And now Renee Young asks Daniel Bryan to talk, but quickly backs off because the Wyatt Family attack. They throw him around backstage and into a ladder right next to Bray, who finishes him off with Sister Abigail's Kiss into the wall while saying the devil made him do it. One trunk thrown into Bryan's head later and he's out cold. So much for all that momentum Shawn gave him.

- Los Matadores v. Three Man Band. This time it's all three in a handicap match. HEATH SLATER HAS A BUTTERFLY NET. YOUR ARGUMENT IS INVALID. Epico and Jinder start, and Mahal works him over only to get hit with a rana and deep armdrag. Mahal reverses to a headlock, and Slater enters only to get caught. Mahal with a running knee allows Slater to stomp away, and 3MB get a double slingshot suplex. McIntyre gets two off of it. McIntyre stomps the head and works the arm. Slater enters and triple-teams some, then gets the air guitar only to miss the kneedrop. Hot tag Primo, who adds some flying jalapenos to McIntyre. Miscommunication disposes of Mahal, but McIntyre gets a running boot. Slater grabs the net and stalks Torito, who ducks under the ring as the chase is on. JBL is whispering on commentary. Torito blasts Slater with a fire extinguisher and gores him. McIntyre is distracted, and the Scot Drop ends it at 3:41. After the match, Slater gets netted instead and Torito adds a flying gore. Honestly, that wasn't even a GOOD comedy match, unlike the Santino effort last week. 1/4*

- AJ Lee and Tamina Snuka v. The Bella Twins. Is it just me, or is this story going backwards? Brie is understandably distracted. For whatever reason, Brie starts anyway with AJ, who attacks early with a spin kick and skips around the ring. Brie with a dropkick, but Tamina enters only for Brie to fend her off. Tamina spins away Brie for one, then slaps on the chinlock. AJ is constantly being shown smiling. Brie elbows out, but Tamina headbutts Brie and yanks her down by the hair for two. Back to the chinlock, but Brie with an enzuigiri and hot tag Nikki. Clotheslines follow, and Nikki with a dropkick. Tamina drops Nikki on the ropes, but is distracted by Brie and Nikki gets a Thesz press. Tamina avoids a charge, but Nikki gets her feet up. Tamina catches Nikki, throws her into Brie, and nails a Samoan Drop. She drags Nikki over to tag in AJ, who is more than ready to end the match, and the Black Widow is on for the tapout at 3:31. Aha – endgame here isn't Eva Marie or JoJo. It's going to be Tamina! The Total Divas really AREN'T legitimate wrestlers at all! 1/2* Maybe not, but that's the vibe I'm getting here. After all, Tamina did all the work in that match as AJ just waited on the side, then AJ insisted on getting the pin. This is how Shawn and Diesel went, too.

- Last night, the Wyatts attacked The Miz. Kane raced in for the save and beat up everyone, Miz included.

- Kane v. The Miz. Miz doesn't do his entrance and appears to be limping. Miz with big rights, but Kane floors him with one punch. Big boot follows for two. Kane with an uppercut, but Miz fights back with big kicks and the through-the-ropes clothesline. Miz dives off the top, but is caught with a chokeslam for the pin at 1:14. After the match, Kane calls out Stephanie. Stephanie does come out (much to the announcers' chagrin), but stays on the stage wisely. Kane takes up the cause against Stephanie, proclaiming her evilness, but knows that doing so is what's Best For Business™, and offers his services to Stephanie. Kane removes his mask and hands it to Stephanie as he leaves. Wait, what? Why?

- Hey, the Prime Time Players shill WWE Shop. Darren Young shills the replica Divas' Title. Just saying.

- David Otunga offers his professional opinion on the Big Show lawsuit. You know, this is what he SHOULD be doing. He says the lawsuit could change the power structure of WWE.

- CM Punk is out to talk. He seems much happier, and in fact he admits he FINALLY got a good's night sleep last night because he finally destroyed Paul Heyman. That's right, Heyman is DONE. So now that Heyman's out of the way, it's time to eliminate Ryback. Because with the two separated, Ryback doesn't have a prayer. Interestingly, Punk says the three options are pin, submission, or table. Anyway, Punk promised to end Heyman, and now he'll promise to end Ryback.

- Street Fight (59%): CM Punk v. Ryback. So, as I recall, the difference between “Street Fight” and “Falls Count Anywhere” is that the pin must be in the ring. Ryback throws Punk into the corner and smashes elbows into him. Ryback chops away on Punk, but the blind charge hits knees and Punk with a crossbody for one. Punk disposes of Ryback, following with a plancha... that Ryback catches to send him into the post and barricade. Ryback pounds down on Punk, then goes under the ring and pulls out a table (because the heck with the vote). Ryback goes for Punk, who ninjas up a kendo stick and pounds away on Ryback before walking into a spinebuster. Ryback screams at Punk to get up and loads the Meathook, but Punk ducks under with a swinging neckbreaker for two. Now Punk finishes setting up the table, but Ryback catches a high kick and nails a turnbuckle powerbomb. Ryback with a headbutt in the corner and he loads Punk on the top turnbuckle, following up for a superplex. Punk chops his way out and knocks Ryback down, but Ryback catches Punk AGAIN only for Punk to slip out and high kick Ryback, who falls on the table. Punk goes up, and the Macho Elbow through the table follows into the Anaconda Vice. Ryback taps out at 4:27. That's IT? A five minute match? Wow, Ryback really IS in the doghouse. *1/4 But before we get too excited, the Wyatt Family are headed to the ring. Wow, they're really bringing the Wyatts up fast. Punk won't leave and keeps the kendo stick near him. Punk uses the stick to get a little distance, but it's no use as the Wyatts beat Punk down. Crowd hopes for Daniel Bryan to make the save, but that's not happening. Wyatt heads to the ring as Punk is bleeding. But Punk headbutts Wyatt and gets another flurry, only it doesn't lead to anything and Wyatt seems happy to see it. Wyatt with Sister Abigail's Kiss on Punk to finish the deal. Again, the devil made him do it. Punk's blood on Wyatt's arm is a great touch. See, this is how you push someone the crowd is getting behind.

- We the People v. The Rhodes Brothers. This is non-title, which makes sense since they haven't earned the shot. Dustin and Cesaro start, with some lockups that go nowhere. Dustin splits in Cesaro's face, which annoys Cesaro and gets him to walk into some armdrags. Cesaro brings in Swagger, but Dustin works his arm, too, as the Universe declares He Still Got It. Dustin is cornered, and in comes Cesaro to box him in the corner. Dustin with a back elbow off the second rope for one. The brothers double-team Cesaro, and Cody with a running knee for one. Cesaro works Cody over in the corner, but Cody reverses only to get into a chinlock. Cody blocks that and suplexes Cesaro, bringing Dustin in for a bulldog for two. Everyone tags out, and Cody with a springboard dropkick to Swagger before sending him out of the ring as we go to break. All these WWE2K14 ads make me realize Goldust isn't in the game. Neither is Roddy Piper. I consider these both grave oversights. We return with Cody cornered by We the People, and Swagger gets a clothesline and belly-to-belly suplex. Cesaro enters with a Karelin suplex on Cody, getting two. Cesaro with a European Uppercut, and Swagger enters and gets a front chancery. Cody tries to push Swagger back for the tag, but Swagger adjusts his grip and throws Cody into the corner. Cesaro with a Hotshot for good measure, and Swagger and Cesaro do the Vaderbomb/leapfrog stomp combo (although Swagger was a little too far away and Cesaro did more of a dropkick) for two. JBL's conspiracy theory about Los Matadores and El Torito is getting old. Cody escapes a chinlock, but gets nailed with the elevation uppercut for two before Dustin saves. Cesaro and Dustin exchage words, buying time for Cody, but Cesaro with a straight right to keep up the punishment. Cody fights out and throws punches, getting a knee to the face that sends Cesaro to the outside. Swagge can't cut off the hot tag, and Dustin bowls down anyone that moves, adding the kneeling uppercut to Swagger. Dustin in the corner with the ten-punch countalong, stopping at nine to do the inhalation before landing #10. I miss that spot. Swagger reverses a whip but runs into a powerslam. Cody nails the Disaster on Cesaro, and Dustin with a twisting crossbody on Swagger for two. Swagger instantly reverses to the Patriot Lock, but Dustin escapes and cradles Swagger for two as Cesaro saves. Cody is dumped again, so is Cesaro again, and Swagger clips Dustin and gets the Patriot Lock for the submission at 12:16. YES! THEY'RE GETTING A PUSH! ***1/4 Sorry, guys, but I'm a big Swagger fan. Deal with it.

- The failed cash-in deserves a recap.

- Alberto Del Rio is out in a suit. Del Rio doesn't care about the failed cash-in, because he is upset with “that thief” John Cena. Cena stole the belt, don't you know. There will be a rematch, and Del Rio will make Cena hurt BAD. The arm is a target for the submission specialist, who promises to break it. The World Title is his and only his, but we already know that. So we have Cena/ADR at Survivor Series (not official, but most likely).

- WWE2K14 provides us with a look at Undertaker v. Goldberg as a WrestleMania match. The Streak would continue, of course.

- Summer Rae v. Natalya. You know, how in the world is Summer Rae supposed to get over when JBL won't even call her by her name? JBL says Summer Rae looks like Josephine Baker. I believe Josephine was black. Meanwhile, Natalya comes out to Great Khali's music. If they make Khali, Hornswoggle, Santino, and Kidd a Survivor Series team for the pre-show match, I'll watch. Summer Rae dances, but Natalya escapes a kick catch and applies a leglock. Summer reverses to a headlock, but Natalya runs her over. Natalya handsprings over Summer on a criss-cross and goes for a waistlock, but Summer with a jack-knife for one that Natalya makes a backslide for two. They keep the arms hooked, and Summer smashes Natalya and does some ballet moves with the rope. Spinning high kick gets one. Summer yells in Natalya's face and does the boot choke, looking like a talented Stacy Keibler more and more by the minute, then adds a snapmare and STUMP PULLER OF DOOM. Summer turns it into a pinning predicament for two. She floors Summer for two, then mocks Natalya before working the leg. Spinning leglock into a quasi-figure four follows. Natalya slaps Summer to break it, and Summer just goes to catfighting. Natalya backs Summer into the corner, but Summer counters for two before we HIT THE CHINLOCK. Summer just lays Natalya down and covers for one before we return to the chinlock. Yes, that happened. Natalya elbows out, but runs into a dropkick for two. Summer makes out with Fandango, but Hornswoggle interrupts. Fandango floors Hornswoggle and gets floored by Khali, which allows Natalya to recover with the Sharpshooter for the submission at 5:18. THIS is the woman they rave about on NXT? -*

- Main event celebration. And yes, the locker room is on the stage again. Curtis Axel is capable of standing at least. The Shield are between the stage and the ring. This is, right now, literally the same setup we had the night after SummerSlam. Bryan and Brie are absent as of now, as are a few other top-carders. Shield enter the ring with HHH and Stephanie. HHH says that Vince asked him, “the man who started it all”, who the face of the WWE would be back in 2003. HHH said he found that man and put him in Evolution and watched him become a star. (My thought: But enough about Batista.) Then that star became an evil man who attacked everyone, including the McMahons. But now, he is truly A+ and is the WWE Champion who won at Hell in a Cell and is truly the face of WWE. HHH lets us know Bryan is in a hospital bed and will not interrupt this celebration. The prophecy is fulfilled, and the face of the WWE is WWE Champ. So here's Randy Orton. The crowd is just numb. Very little reaction to Orton's entrance. Stephanie lets us know that Orton is EVERYONE'S champion, and he represents the WWE locker room. He's what they should be. Stephanie asks them to show Orton respect, and from what I saw, only Brad Maddox applauded. Crowd starts a HUGE “NO” chant. Orton says being champion makes him better than everyone else. Orton says you're either born a success or never a success. Orton calls himself the roster's superior... and Big Show's music hits!? And yes, here he comes storming to the ring. Shield dogpile on Show, but the Rhodeses and Usos take the Shield out of the equation as all heck breaks loose on stage. This leaves Show alone with Orton and HHH. JBL asks the obvious: how did he sneak in anywhere? Show sends the Authority scrambling out of the ring and grabs the mic. He doesn't care about the restraining order because the Orton thing makes him sick. He's not afraid of going to jail because he WILL be bailed out. Show will cost the company millions of dollars and doesn't care if he bankrupts HHH and WWE. He will take everything from them because he has nothing to lose... but Orton attacks Show from behind with the belt. He measures Show, but Show catches Orton with the WMD instead. HHH and Stephanie are out of ideas as Show does the COME AT ME BRO pose. Just to show where the heat is, the crowd is chanting YES at this. HHH pulls his jacket off and looks like he's going to get physical, but backs off instead. Stephanie is holding HHH back. There's a long standoff between the two as the crowd unloads a HUGE Big Show chant. Fair enough. But HHH won't do anything as Big Show's music plays. Show walks out in triumph as HHH returns and fumes. The locker room has abandoned the stage, presumably trying to break up the Shield fight, and that's the last thing we see as the show ends.

FINAL THOUGHTS:

So a SummerSlam main event featuring a divided crowd with John Cena facing an minor league superstar that the crowd wanted to see go to the top has now linearly turned into a feud between HHH as company executive against a big guy from WCW. That's the last I'm saying about THAT.

Let's focus on more positive things: Bryan and Punk are likely to team up against the Wyatts, which will make a fantastic big/little dynamic. We the People are going against the Rhodes Brothers, and everyone in that match knows how to do a Southern-style tag team match that will blow the roof off. Big E Langston is getting the push he's shown in NXT he deserved.

They're reshuffling the midcard, which is a good thing because they need to test new people. Sandow was not getting over as Mr. Money in the Bank, and this was officially pulling the plug on that experiment. Bray Wyatt is the hot hand as a heel, and now he's getting his chance with the top names. Kane will likely replace Orton in teaming with the Shield against some combination the Rhodeses and Usos at Survivor Series, or would if I did it. So right now, the undercard is still where it needs to be and improving.

The AJ thing is reaching critical mass. It's true that Brie isn't really a wrestler's wrestler, but it's clear they've given up on Natalya, and tonight's stinker doesn't give me confidence anyway. Tamina needs to be endgame, because it's poetic justice, and also because the Total Divas have been punked out by AJ over the past few weeks to the point where none of them are likely to be the one to win the gold.

Plus, Cena's back. Love him or hate him, he puts on great matches, so I will simply enjoy those. The fact that he's agreed to work Tuesdays can only be a plus for that show. Say what you will about Bryan or Orton, but merch numbers indicate Cena IS good for business, so more of him is a shrewd move.

There's enough to like about this show. Let's focus on that.

STATS:

MATCH TIME: 50:54 over nine matches

BEST MATCH: Cena/Sandow

WORST MATCH: Summer/Natalya

NIGHT MVP (kayfabe): Bray Wyatt

FINAL SCORE: 6. There's enough that I like, and the Cena/Sandow matches needs to be seen, as does the tag champ's match. Kane's inexplicable heel turn is a dark mark on the undercard, but I'm actually willing to let that play out. The celebration did nothing for me.

That's all I got. Stay tuned for Scott Keith and Tommy Hall bringing you Raw Lite, NXT, and SmackDown. In the meantime, I'll be busy playing WWE2K14.