When last we left our heroes, they were
celebrating Christmas with the troops. But now that the festive
season is basically out of the way, it's time to focus on what's
important: the Royal Rumble. Challengers must be named, participants
must declare, and the fastest hour in sports entertainment must begin
to take shape. But how will it take shape? And who steps aside to
challenge Randy Orton?
The live look-in hypes the
Intercontinental Title match between Big E Langston and Fandango, and
the Authority has some announcements to make.
The PG Era Rant for Raw, December 30,
2013.
Live from Richmond, VA.
Your hosts are Mike, John, and Jerry.
First to the ring: CM Punk! He is
FIRED UP to be here in Richmond. I don't know if you're heard, but
it's the last Raw of 2013. Punk says the year had good stuff and bad
stuff in it, but that's the same for everyone. He started off the
year as WWE Champion, faced the Rock twice, tried to take out the
Streak, made some friends, lost some friends, beat up some friends
with a kendo stick... but all in all, it wasn't his biggest year.
Heck, at best he's behind the Shield – 2013 was their year.
They've been unstoppable; they've held gold; but he wants to end 2013
with a bang and has a proposition for the Shield. That's enough to
get the Shield to appear. They enter the ring and back Punk into the
corner. Ambrose asks for a darn good reason not to beat him
senseless right then and there. Punk says there's no fun in beating
up just one guy – we KNOW the Shield can do that. But Punk wants
to fight the best, one on one. He wants the best of the Shield...
whoever it is. Ambrose agrees, and he demands Punk as he's ready to
begin right then and there... but Punk says he's already beaten
Ambrose, so can someone else step up please? Ambrose: “You think
this is funny? You think I'm a joke?” Punk: “I just think
you're the weak link and I wanna find out who the strong link is!”
He then demands Roman Reigns' attention, but Seth Rollins says HE'S
the best of the Shield and accepts the challenge. But Punk says
everyone is putting Reigns over. Reigns and Rollins argue as Ambrose
paces. We hear Rollins say it's nothing personal and he wants to
prove he's the best. The fans are voting for Reigns... and before we
get an answer, here's Brad Maddox. He wishes to remind us that he's
in charge of Raw, so... Happy New Year. He's like the new Eric
Bischoff. So Maddox says Punk will indeed face Rollins. Crowd is
unhappy with this development. The match is NOW!
CM Punk v. Seth Rollins. Punk with a
headlock, tackling down Punk and catching Rollins for a quick GTS but
Rollins bails. Reigns is unimpressed as we go to break. Rollins: “I
got him, all right? I'll take care of business.” We return with
Rollins working over Punk with rights, kicking him down in the
corner. Ambrose taunts Punk, and Rollins picks him up only to have
his whip reversed. Punk with a weak kick and a butterfly
backbreaker. Rollins elbows away Punk, but Punk goes for the Bite of
the Dragon (Rollins messed up the first try). Rollins slams Punk off
the top, getting two. Rollins stalls and stomps away on Punk,
dropping his weight on the back and going to a camel clutch. It goes
nowhere, so Rollins clubs Punk and wedgies him to his feet. Forearms
to the back follow, but Punk turns around and clubs away on Rollins.
Rollins puts his head down, and Punk does what passes for a small
package for two. Rollins knocks him down, getting two. Rollins to
the chinlock, but Punk back suplexes out of it. Blind charge by
Rollins eats boot, and Punk goes up and gets thrown into the
barricade. We take a second break now. Back again, with Punk
headbutting Rollins repeatedly into the corner, but a blind charge
hits the post. Rollins gets two. Rollins on the second rope, but
the legdrop airballs. Slugfest follows, won by Punk, who follows up
with a leg lariat and clotheslines. He fakes the spinout neckbreaker
to GTS, but Rollins tries a cradle, only for Punk to sit down for
two. Punk throws Rollins into the corner as some people in the crowd
say this is awesome. No. Punk races in, but Rollins catches him and
throws him across the ring in the turnbuckle bomb for two. Rollins:
“Just stay down!” Rollins punches away on Punk and glares at the
ref. He goes for a running stomp, but Punk misses. Rollins recovers
with an enzuigiri for two. Reigns is not impressed. Rollins signals
for GTS on Punk, and he tries it, but Punk escapes and gets the
running knee and short-arm lariat. Punk up top, and the Heartbreak
elbow... no, Rollins rolls away and suckers Punk in, sending him into
the turnbuckles with a drop toehold. Ambrose keeps taunting Punk as
Rollins goes to the top, but Punk crotches him. Punk follows up,
getting a superplex attempt, but Rollins reverses to a front suplex
drop and follows. Punk rolls through into the Anaconda Vice, and
Ambrose fakes a run-in to break. Rollins grabs Punk and goes for
something, but Punk reverses to the GTS try. Again Ambrose distracts
Punk, and Rollins with the Shiranui for two. Reigns isn't happy that
Ambrose spent too long on the apron. He even tries to blame Ambrose
TO Rollins, who just shakes his head. Naturally, Punk throws Rollins
onto the other two Shield members. Punk tries to dive, but Rollins
intercepts and springboards in... to a GTS. That's it at 17:44.
MAN, if this was Seth Rollins' big tryout, he bombed. *1/4
Commentary plays up whether the Shield cost Rollins the match.
Backstage,
Brad Maddox speaks to a referee about how important the title match
is, but the Authority interrupts. Kane is not in the building
tonight, so Maddox knows he's in charge and offers to step up. And
here comes Daniel Bryan. He demands Bray Wyatt one-on-one tonight.
Maddox, instead, offers a Wyatt Family gauntlet: Harper, Rowan, Bray
in that order. Bryan agrees. Stephanie was impressed with how he
handled it... but Stephanie can top it with the announcement of the
Royal Rumble title match.
Tribute
to the Troops Did You Know with background music called “Here's To
Us” – well, that summarizes every Did You Know.
Stephanie
is on her way to announce the match. She wishes everyone a happy new
year and talks about how it's a time for reflection. What would they
have done differently? Nothing, of course. They're McMahons;
they've done it right with a unified champion. It's time to
celebrate the champion: Randy Orton. We get a full video of Orton's
career.. On August 15, 2004, he pinned [Redacted] to be the youngest
champion ever. In 2005, he beat the Undertaker at SummerSlam. He
beat Kurt Angle in 2006, HHH in a Last Man Standing Match in 2007, he
won at WrestleMania 24, he won the 2009 Royal Rumble, had a big win
over CM Punk at WrestleMania 27, and now here he stands in 2013 as
the one and only champion. It should be noted that the 2013 portion
of his video makes it clear HHH handed him the title at SummerSlam.
At least they give him credit for TLC. Stephanie applauds the video.
But Orton is a fighting champion, so he will fight at the Royal
Rumble in a traditional match (though no countout or DQ) in a rematch
against John Cena. Stephanie made it clear it's pinfall or
submission only, for the record. This did not require ten minutes.
We
look back over the Wyatts/Bryan feud. That will lead to the gauntlet
tonight – they're making it seem like the matches will not be
consecutive. Also, an Intercontinental Title match tonight!
Batista
will be arriving on January 20 to make sure nobody that the fans have
been clamoring for all year gets a title shot. Sorry, the first 45
minutes of this show has me in a bad mood.
Stephanie
is backstage, happy with herself. HHH is happy we'll know who the
real man is... didn't we know that last month? But wait, HHH has
something even BIGGER to talk about.
Curtis
Axel v. Dolph Ziggler. A Superstars inset has Axel promising he'll
improve on his 2013 performance. Dolph also has New Year's
Resolutions, the big one being stealing the show. Oh, great, someone
told Vince about Instagram. Axel pounds away to start, but Dolph
avoids a flapjack and dropkicks Axel. Axel hammer throws Dolph out
of the ring. He follows over the top rope and slams Dolph's back
into the apron. Back in, it gets two. Axel with a series of front
elbows and he grinds the forearm into the face for two. Axel with a
dropkick for two, and he goes to the chinlock. The crowd is trying
to chant something, but I have no idea what. Dolph fights to a
vertical base and elbows out, then reverses Axel into the middle
turnbuckle. Axel's head BOUNCED hard. Dolph jumps onto Axel and
does the ten punch express into a neckbreaker. Dolph with a
crossbody, but Axel avoids the Zig Zag and cradles Dolph for one,
reversed for two. The high jump DDT is blocked, and Axel with a
swinging neckbreaker for two. Axel clubs away and slaps Dolph's
head, slamming him to the mat by the hair. But he stalls for so long
that Dolph comes out of NOWHERE with the Zig Zag for the pin at 4:14.
Great camera work – we never saw Dolph get up and get behind Axel.
Nothing to see otherwise. *
Tonight,
Damien Sandow is in a WWE App match! The announcers are becoming
self-aware of how annoying the How To Download bits are. Sandow's
opponent possibilities are Kofi, Khali, and Miz. Hang on, I need to
pretend to vote for Khali.
The
title match is NEXT.
Next
week: Raw goes Old-School. Advertised: Ric Flair, Roddy Piper, Bob
Backlund, the New Age Outlaws, Rikishi, Booker T, Diamond Dallas
Page, and Scotty II Hotty.
Intercontinental
Title: Big E Langston v. Fandango. Hey, JBL didn't call Summer Rae
“Mrs. Fandango”! When did that start? That reminds me: has the
DLC with these two been released yet? They jostle in a lockup to
start, which goes nowhere as the crowd chants for Summer Rae.
Barely. Fandango with a headlock, but he gets run over for one.
Langston with a waistlock throw into a series of bridges for
one-counts. Fandango with a kick to the gut and a chopfest breaks
out, which Langston EASILY wins. Blind charge hits boot, and a leg
lariat follows for two. Fandango with another chop and a headbutt,
then he clubs away. Langston gets a chant as he wins a criss-cross
with a tackle and shoulder ram in the corner. Another charge leads
to a shoulder ram. Fandango slides out of the Big Ending and heads
to the floor. I think I heard a Big E chant. Langston meets
Fandango and clotheslines him on the floor. Langston sends Fandango
into the barricade, and back in we go. Fandango trips Langston and
sends a knee into his face. Fandango slams Langston's leg on the
apron on the outside, and back in, more stomping. Fandango works the
leg some more, getting the Celtic Knot. Langston's shoulders are
down for one. Langston punches his way out of it, but the damage is
done and he's slow on a charge to the corner, sending him into the
post as we go to break. We return with a good Big E chant as
Fandango keeps working the leg. Summer Rae cha-chas to celebrate as
Lawler makes it a big deal: Fandango, as a dancer, is working the
legs because he knows how important they are. Fandango backs
Langston into the corner with uppercuts, then returns to the Celtic
Knot. Langston again fights out to break, so Fandango switches
legholds, then moves to the chinlock. Seriously, Johnny? A
chinlock? You can't think of a good leg-based resthold? Lawler
namedrops Silva to point out the importance of working the legs as
Langston gets separation and begins his comeback. Fandango headbutts
out of the Greco-Roman throw, but Langston gets it from apron to ring
on the second try. Ultimate Splash try, but Fandango kicks his leg
out of his leg. Tornado DDT by Fandango gets two. To the top, and
the flying legdrop, but Langston rolls out of the ring much to
Fandango's chagrin. So Fandango dropkicks Langston from the apron.
Back in, he charges into an overhead suplex. More clotheslines
follow, and NOW the Ultimate Splash hits. Straps come down, and it's
Big Ending time, and that's it at 13:05. I will say, Fandango
started to impress me for the first time on Raw since I've been
recapping, but I was disappointed in the finish: Fandango spent all
that time working the leg, and the finish saw Langston shrug it off
and do his usual. These two have potential, but they definitely need
more seasoning before they try 15 minutes again, much less against
each other. **
More
history of Daniel Bryan against the Family, as we see Bryan kidnapped
and dumped in an empty parking lot. And match #1 is Daniel Bryan
against Luke Harper, TONIGHT.
Next
week: CM Punk will face Roman Reigns They even do throwback graphics
for the match and use Thorn In Your Eye. Nice.
Renee
Young is with Damien Sandow. Care to guess how he feels about the
WWE App match? See, he's had a bad time with the Santa match and
Tribute to the Troops and all that. He doesn't care who his opponent
is, because if he loses, he will quit. Well then.
Vote
now! Go back in time and vote for Khali!
Yay!
LeSean McCoy celebrated his NFL running title with a title belt!
Then LeBron James asked for one of those. John Cena offered to help,
but ironically Dwayne Johnson stepped in ahead of him and got him the
belt instead. Dwayne won't even put Cena over when it comes to handing out swag!
WWE
App Match: Damien Sandow v. The Great Khali (39%). YES! Sandow
looks disgusted. Sandow sticks and moves, but he gets caught and
headchopped. Khali sends Sandow into the corner and does the CHOP OF
DOOM to floor him. He asks for one more, and delivers in the
opposite corner. Headbutt floors Sandow, and he goes for a
powerbomb, but Sandow escapes and bails. He Hotshots Khali on the
top rope, but runs into an elbow. Sandow recovers with a basement
dropkick and works the leg. He drops elbows and stomps the knee.
Crowd wants Sandow to win. Sandow drops his weight on Khali's leg,
getting two. Back to a leglock. Khali fghts out, but Sandow kicks
him in the head and gets a series of kneedrops and a front elbowdrop
for two. Back to the leg for Sandow, and he adds elbows. Khali
clubs away to break, but Sandow goes ground-and-pound and then DDTs
Khali's leg. Back to a leghold as the crowd is bored. Khali clubs
away again to break, but Sandow lands a headbutt and clubs down the
head. Cubito Aequet connects, getting two. Khali lands a CHOP OF
DOOM from his knees to even the score on Sandow, and Sandow's charge
eats boot. Clotheslines follow, and he loads up the headchop, but
Sandow bails to the corner. Khali now gets a chant as he goes to the
Head Vice, but Sandow sends him into the turnbuckle and cradles him
with the tights to preserve his career at 4:55. Or was it only two?
Who knows. Replays show that Khali's shoulder popped up during the
rollup. A good smart heel versus force of nature face match. *1/4
We
look at Daniel Bryan knocking Bray Wyatt out with the running knee on
SmackDown a few weeks ago. He's running the gauntlet tonight!
R-Truth
has Xavier Woods and the Funkadactyls with him, and he'll face Brodus
Clay next.
Folks,
I'll save you the trouble of scrolling up or calling me insane in the
comments: Seth Rollins was so far off his game that he dragged an
18-minute match with CM Punk down to the level of a 5-minute match
with Sandow and Khali. Rollins botched repeatedly during the match
and stalled way too much. There wasn't much story to the match, and
he was never a threat to Punk – we all KNEW Rollins would lose. At
least Sandow/Khali had some intrigue to it, and Sandow wrestled a
smart match, perfectly in tune with his character.
WARNING: THE SHOW IS ABOUT TO GO STRAIGHT INTO THE TOILET! RUN AWAY!
R-Truth
v. Brodus Clay. Clay has no entrance. Xavier Woods is on
commentary. Clay shoves down Truth, then throws him into the corner
and punches away. Clay misses a lariat and Truth fires in, but Clay
shoves Truth into the splits. Truth sticks and moves, but he runs
into the battering ram headbutt. HEART PUNCH OF DOOM follows. Clay
with a double punch to Truth's gut and he pounds away in the corner.
He stands on Truth's back and drops his knee on the back. Clay with
the T-Bone Suplex, and he tries the Body Vice, but Truth escapes only
to get avalanched. Clay pounds the kidneys of Truth and Hammer
Throws Truth across the ring. Clay drops his weight on Truth, then
blocks a kick and goes CLUBBERIN, THEY BE CLUBBERIN TONY. Back to
the Body Vice, and Clay just drops deadweight to the mat and lands an
elbowdrop for two. Clay throws Truth into the corner and avalanches
him twice, and Woods is so upset he decides... to call a DANCE BREAK!
Here comes the Funkadactyls, and it works, as Clay eats booth on a
blind charge and does the Little Jimmy off the second rope for the
pin at 4:05. What the heck was THAT finish? Seriously? DUD
Everyone dances. Well, except Clay. And Truth, since his back is
in bad shape. You have Clay squash R-Truth and then lose to dancing? Who the hell does this get over?
Later
tonight, the Funkadactyls will team with the Bellas and Eva Marie
against Summer Rae, Aksana, Rosa, Alicia, and Kaitlyn. Kaitlyn looks
different – I had to be told that was who it was.
HHH
has an announcement coming up!
We go
Old School next week! Add Money Inc and Gene Okerlund to the list of
advertised stars.
And
here's HHH with the main event of the second hour: He has something
to say. Sorry, this show is wearing on me. HHH says that 2013 was
epic, under his Authority, and 2014 will be unlike anything we've
seen. And to prove it, Brock Lesnar is back! And Paul Heyman is
with him. Just for the record, I knew he would be on Raw – the
SmackDown taping I attended spoiled it. HHH and Heyman shake hands,
then HHH extends his hand to Brock. Brock reluctantly shakes hands
(Heyman: “The man signs the checks.”) Meanwhile, the fans want
Goldberg. Heyman has the floor now. Heyman wishes to inform the
world of Brock's mission statement for 2014. He's not here to settle
any old scores, since you fight Brock, you lose, and Brock moves on.
Brock also isn't here for revenge (which writes CM Punk out of the
equation). Heyman, indeed, will forgive and move on, because he's
the bigger man. This isn't about Heyman, anyway; it's about Brock.
Brock is back because it's BEST FOR BUSINESS™ for him to go after
the WWE Title. Which means whomever wins at the Royal Rumble really
loses, because Brock is waiting in the wings as the #1 Contender.
Brock has a live mic. Run. He doesn't care whether it's Cena OR
Orton, because nobody can stop him. Ahem, Mark, that's your cue.
Brock shouldn't have to win the Royal Rumble just to get a
championship match, and he doesn't have to stand in line. He's at
the front of the line. He dares ANYONE to prove otherwise. Okay,
Mark... any minute now. Heyman says no one is man enough to take
Brock up on the challenge. Brock's life is Eat, Sleep, Conquer,
Repeat. He takes what he wants, and he wants the WWE Title. Heyman
goes for the big finish, and NOW Henry emerges. Mark just takes his
T-shirt off and walks to the ring, and Brock jumps him before he can
get in. Henry fights out and sends Brock into the front row of
ringside. Brock, though, catches Henry and bull rushes him through
the barricade. Henry appears to have a bad back from the impact, so
Brock picks Henry up (!!) and F-5s him to the floor. Brock screams
like a girl. I feel safe typing this since I'm 100 miles away.
Heyman calls Brock off, saying message delivered. Heyman: “Well,
someone had to be made an example of.”
WARNING:
THE FOLLOWING SECTION CONTAINS MASSIVE SNARK AND IS NOT PART OF AN
AVERAGE RECAP. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK OF THINKING I'M AN IDIOT.
Now
here's my big question: why is stuff like this only reserved for the
part-timers? Why can't we have Daniel Bryan or CM Punk go on a tear?
We know that Bryan will have to fight through all the Wyatts; why
not have him take out Harper and Rowan in a minute each to establish
how dominant he is? Heck, John Cena's here every day... why hand him
the title shot instead of having him destroy everyone the Authority
sends at him until they finally agree to it? Randy Orton got
insanely over by beating the Rhodeses and destroying the Miz; can't
he do that to someone else? Instead, it's Brock who gets that honor
of being a harbinger of doom. You know Batista will get this honor
when he returns. The only regular who gets this kind of treatment is
Big Show, but he's done it so often it drags his opponents down –
witness the match he had with Bryan in September. When this happens,
it just makes the people who wrestle now, every day, look bad, while
the people like Big Show and Brock who were around ten years ago...
...oh,
right. In HHH's prime. Moving on.
WE
NOW RETURN TO THE RAW RECAP.
Replays
of Mark Henry and Brock Lesnar throwing each other all over the
place.
Brie
Bella, Nikki Bella, Cameron, Naomi, and Eva Marie v. Kaitlyn, Alicia
Fox, Aksana, Summer Rae, and Rosa Mendes. The non-Total Divas get no
entrance. Kaitlyn and Eva Marie start. Kaitlyn gets a waistlock,
but Eva Marie elbows out and acts like she accomplished something,
playing to the crowd. She turns around into a Kaitlyn dropkick as
the announcers say Eva Marie may have an ego. Kaitlyn kicks away and
gets a backbreaker for two. Kaitlyn puts her head down, and Eva
Marie with a kick and slap. She tags in... uh... no one wants in.
So she slaps Cameron in, and Cameron argues with Eva Marie. Now
Alicia tags HERself in, and Cameron with a tilt-a-whirl headscissors.
Cameron tries something out of the corner and falls flat on her face
– not a botch, mind you – for two. Alicia drags Cameron into her
corner, and Summer Rae comes in with a boot choke. Rosa now in, and
she stomps away. Aksana in, and she does the Alley-Oop Bomb out of
the corner. It gets two. Aksana works the arm now as the faces warm
the crowd up. Aksana with a hairpull slam and she stomps away. A
kick to the gut follows, getting two, and back to the arm. Cameron
punches out and gets a jawbreaker, but Aksana can't stop the hot tag
to Nikki. STO to Aksana and a lariat, then a dropkick. Clothesline
in the corner and the Torture Rack, but everybody's into the ring and
we pair off. Lawler encourages them to come his way. Aksana runs
into an elbow, but Nikki cuts off Rosa, so Aksana drops her on the
ropes and gets her finisher (an elbowdrive bulldog) for the pin at
5:11. WHO CARES? Why does any of this matter if AJ doesn't take any
of them seriously, treats them like jobbers, and then beats them and
skips away like nothing happened? Why should I care about any of
them if the champ thinks they're all cannon fodder? 1/2*
Clips
of Bryan getting sent off a loading dock on SmackDown, and it's a
gauntlet match tonight.
Batista
is coming back. Don't know if you've heard.
A
look back at the Tribute to the Troops. If you want to know what
happened, go find my review on this blog.
We
find out that Mark Henry has been taken to the hospital.
Maddox
admits that Khali's shoulders were not down and he reprimanded the
referee. Stephanie is happy with Maddox's performance, and he admits
he recruited most of Stephanie's favorites. HHH wants to know “he”
will be there, and Maddox seems to confirm Ric Flair with a whoo. Not
a good one. A corny one. I like it.
We
look at last week, as the Wyatts beat up Daniel Bryan. He was going
to get Bray at Tribute to the Troops, but that went nowhere. So now,
he will try to get them all.
This
week on SmackDown, the Rhodeses defend the titles against Harper and
Rowan. You'll enjoy it.
Gauntlet
Match: Daniel Bryan v. Luke Harper [1], Erick Rowan [2], and Bray
Wyatt [3]. Michael Cole tries to get people to see the hashtag
located on the top left corner of the screen, but it's buried under
the TV-PG-V box. I like the concept here – it's like the final
level of a platformer, where all the mid-bosses return to wear you
down for the final boss. Bryan goes for a quick hold, but Harper
backs Bryan into the corner and rakes the face. Bryan ducks a lariat
and gets a forearm smash or two, then kicks into the gut in the
corner. Bryan goes with a basement dropkick on Harper, then kicks at
the hamstring. He ties Harper's leg in the ropes and slugs away,
adding a hamstring dropkick. But Bryan stares at Wyatt, and Harper
kicks Bryan down. Bryan comes back with more kicks and a dragon
screw, switching to a surfboard bow-and-arrow. He includes a
fishhook during the setup for good measure. Only it's not a
surfboard, it's a dragon sleeper bow-and-arrow! I've never seen that
before. Harper breaks, but he's the worse for wear. Bryan kicks
away in the corner, adding a European Uppercut, but Harper lands a
right to floor Bryan. Harper chokes Bryan and stomps him, then adds
a double chest chop. He smacks Bryan around in the corner and tries
to rip his nose off, but runs into uppercuts. Harper stops the
momentum, adding a double chop again. Harper picks Bryan up by the
hair/ears, btu Bryan fights out only to get Vadered into the ropes
and boot choked. Guillotine to the middle rope follows. Harper
looks at Wyatt for advice, and Wyatt calls for the finish. Harper
goes to the Gator Roll into a headlock. Bryan punches out, but runs
into a back elbow. The ref calls something to Bryan. Harper pounds
away on Bryan and whips him, but Bryan sends him into the middle
turnbuckle with a drop toe hold and adds a cross-corner dropkick.
Harper catches the second one with a Michinoku Driver for two.
Harper looks to Wyatt for advice as we go to break. We return with
Harper holding a headlock as we see that During the Break, Harper
threw Bryan repeatedly into the barricade. Bryan elbows out, but
Harper slaps him away and whips him across the ring, only to trigger
the comeback. Harper charges, but Bryan low-bridges him to get some
time, then follows with a tope suicida. He adds a second one. YES
Knees follow, and back in, Bryan with a missile dropkick and kip up.
YES Kick series time, but the roundhouse misses... no, it's a
fake-out and the other leg hits for two. Wyatt is screaming at
Harper to get on the offensive, but Bryan is up first and kicks away.
Bryan sets Harper on the top rope and tries a Frankensteiner, but
Harper reverses to a powerbomb for two. Harper is totally confused
as to how THAT didn't end anything and walks around in a daze, then
picks Bryan up and forearms him down. Another double chop follows.
He kicks away at Bryan and picks him up again, but Bryan fires back
with lefts and rights only to be caught with a half-nelson suplex for
two. Harper bends down to pick Bryan up, but Bryan hooks the Yes
Lock, only for Harper to fight out of it and nail a big boot.
European Uppercut by Harper and he works over Bryan in the corner.
Bryan flips out of a German suplex, and the running knee ends Harper
at 15:01. That match alone blows everything else tonight out of the
water, and we're just warming up. Rowan attacks from behind, but the
ref insists on a standing start. We resume at 15:41, as Rowan throws
Bryan to the outside and into the steps. Rowan picks Bryan up and
gets a swinging slam over the announce table. The announcers wonder
if he can get back in the ring as we go to break again. We return
to... an Old School Raw ad? C'mon, guys, there's a match going on!
Okay, so we return with Rowan applying the DOUBLE NOOGIE OF DOOM to
Bryan, but Bryan headbutts out only to run into a pancake. It gets
two. Rowan with a headbutt to slow him down, then an elbow. Rowan
with a series of right jabs, and he lays him on the top turnbuckle
and chops away. He then goes up, picks up Bryan, and it's a
second-rope fallaway slam. Bryan is favoring his knee on the
landing, but he seems to give the ref the OK. And indeed, Bryan
shocks Rowan with a small package to win at 22:07. An angry Rowan
lands a big boot and elbowdrops, but Harper calls Rowan off and makes
peace. Bray is giddy at what's next. He slowly enters the ring, but
the ref checks on Bryan, who hasn't gotten up yet. Bray with the
inverted look pre-match, and Bryan pulls himself up for the start.
Bray fakes a charge, then the bell rings at 23:53. Bray turns his
back on Bryan... and with good reason, as Harper and Rowan stop
anything from happening at 24:07. HA HA, you thought you'd get what
you wanted tonight? ***1/2
They toss Bryan to the outside, throwing him into the barricade
repeatedly. Hey, remember back in September when the whole locker
room emptied to protect Bryan? Where are they now? Rowan with an
avalanche, and he sends Bryan into a Harper lariat. Bray asks for
them to pick Bryan up (“I want him to feel this!”), and they do a
double tree bomb. Bray sings eerily. Bray declares the story over,
since he has no more mercy for Bryan. They could've worked together,
but not anymore. Now he'll punish Bryan. He demands that Bryan look
him in the eyes. This is the end, he says. Bryan: “You're...
you're right.” He's beaten Bryan into submission. Bray asks for
more as the crowd chants NO. Bryan begs for the mic, and when Bray
hands it over, Bryan says, “You were always right. No matter how
many matches I won, no matter how loud these people cheered for me,
you were always right. The machine... the machine would never let me
win. NO matter how loud you people chanted, you chanted YES in every
building I've ever been to, and they don't care. I'm yours.”
Wyatt laughs in triumph. “Let me join the Family.” Are you
KIDDING ME? Crowd is screaming NO. Bray demands that Bryan crawl to
him. Bryan pulls himself up via Bray and offers himself... but Bray
won't even allow that, giving him Sister Abigail's Kiss. Bray NOW
seems to welcome him in, as Harper and Rowan drag him away. The
Wyatts carry Bryan to the back as the crowd is absolutely sick.
As am I. Bryan can barely stand, but the Wyatts let him go. Bray makes a
brutally hurt Bryan drag himself behind Bray as they walk away in
triumph. Bryan reaches the top of the stage and glares at Bray as
the crowd begs NO. Bryan looks back to the crowd, and he seems to be
confused. Bray is yelling at him to follow. Bryan finally looks
down at his own injuries, then becomes furious. The crowd thinks
it's the fake-out and chants for Daniel Bryan. But Bryan shakes his
head. He's beaten. He looks down in shame and, this time
voluntarily, follows Bray. That's how we end 2013: with Daniel
Bryan, your hero, walking off a slave to someone else.
FINAL
THOUGHTS:
Dear
WWE Universe,
We've
listened to you cheer for CM Punk and Daniel Bryan. We've listened
to how you want someone to rise up organically. However, you seem to
forget that I have worked my entire life to be able to control the
business. Therefore, I will have Batista – my pet project – on
top. Brock Lesnar – from my era of wrestling – is the big beast.
The only one who can get one over on the Authority is my
contemporary the Big Show.
I
know you want people like Antonio Cesaro to move up the ranks, but
he's just some one-move guy so he can stay in the midcard if we use
him at all. You love Natalya and her legacy, so we'll turn her into
a Total Diva and make her so vanilla she's interchangeable with Eva
Marie, a Diva we literally created from whole cloth.
Oh,
you say, about AJ? She sold out to get where she is. Haven't you
seen the rumors? They're true. She ingratiated herself to Vince and
me, and now she's allowed to be the only star of the Divas' division
outside of the Total Divas. You know why? Because you don't change
the system, you join it. Unless you're me. I truly changed the
system.
You
want CM Punk? You like the Shield? Okay – they can face each
other forever until that Anoa'i kid is the only strong person left.
You like Daniel Bryan? Forget it... he's too small and too
meaningless, even though Shawn was the same way but we all know it's
because of his association with me. Do ratings drop when Bryan is
gone and the third hour begins? We're not listening.
We
heard you in Seattle. Your move.
Sincerely,
Paul
Levesque
PS –
We know you'll subscribe to the WWE Network. We own your money.
STATS:
MATCH
TIME: 70:55 (not including the time between gauntlet matches) over
seven (or nine) matches
BEST
MATCH: Bryan/Harper
WORST
MATCH: Truth/Clay
NIGHT
MVP: Bray Wyatt
FINAL
SCORE: -3. Any time you make a booking decision that actively costs
you money, and you KNOW it's a bad move and do it anyway, you go
negative. Back in August, I warned that this was just HHH burying
people he didn't think fit his mold for wrestling, and people told me
to wait and see. The job is complete.
Please,
tell me to rant on a PPV for New Year's Day so I can get this awful
taste out of my mouth. In the meantime, I recommend that Tommy and
Scott skip NXT out of protest. Right now, I'm 50/50 on even watching
next week's Raw. Tell me which way to go.
Enjoy wrestling while you still can.
There were a lot of words here, but all I could read was, "Smark Bitch, Smark Bitch Smark Bitch".
ReplyDeleteIf you really think this is a clear cut heel turn, you know nothing about wrestling.
Just my opinion, WAY too negative IMO. It sucks that we don't have Daniel Bryan to root for anymore (apparently), but I think a lot of the matches were better than you gave credit for, and at least I understand why "Daniel Bryan" would agree to some backup after getting his ass whooped time and time again for months.
ReplyDeleteSeth Rollins' big match was against Cena on Friday and he passed with flying colours.
ReplyDeleteThis is embarrassing.
ReplyDeleteI agree,this was on the negative side a bit much.
ReplyDeleteNow the mock HHH letter I WOULD SEE HHH writing to the WWE Universe...
ReplyDeleteI'm torn. Conceptually - at least from a narrative/character standpoint - I think the Bryan turn actually makes a lot of sense. After being relentlessly beaten down and bullied, he cracked and said yes, it's better to have backup.
ReplyDeleteMy problem with it was, it came out of nowhere and at the dumbest possible time. After all this time of Bryan fighting back against the odds, why was this particular monday the turning point? Where was the straw that broke the camel's back? He's had the title literally ripped out of his hands twice, but a guantlet match against the Wyatts is too much for him to take anymore?
I mean, I guess you could make the argument that it helps solidify the Wyatts as crazy, cultish guys that can turn anybody to their crazy cause, but if that was the purpose, they probably could have done it on somebody that wasn't insanely over in his current position.
We're in the build up to Wrestlemania. This is the perfect time for the downtrodden face to make a last push though the Royal Rumble to reclaim what is his. Why not do that first, then let the turn happen after a few months with the title or it has even more emotional impact?
I know the live thread gets snarky, but it's mostly good-natured. This was like Tony Schiavone after Hogan joined the Outsiders.
ReplyDeleteBullcrap. I've been saying since this whole angle began that Daniel Bryan will not be allowed to achieve what the fans have elevated him to. And the whole time, people said it was a meta-gimmick, or this was HHH being a heel, or that they still thought about him. Tonight, they made it perfectly clear: Daniel Bryan was not meant to be a main eventer because we say so.
ReplyDeleteThis has nothing to do with being a clear-cut heel turn. This has EVERYTHING to do with Daniel Bryan, as the Royal Rumble approaches, going from being the clear fans' choice to win the Rumble (and Bryan/Orton at Mania would've been the most logical main event the way the story has gone) to being stuck in a side project and not even being the leader of the faction he's in.
That's the problem here. What we saw tonight was the definitive statement: the most popular wrestler, more popular than Cena, more than RVD, more than Punk even -- the man whom every single story narrative pointed to being Orton's challenger as the Authority's reign crashed on the biggest stage -- is now not even a strong heel. He's weak, pathetic, DONE. And that's who YOU are for supporting him.
"Now here's my big question: why is stuff like this only reserved for the part-timers? Why can't we have Daniel Bryan or CM Punk go on a tear? We know that Bryan will have to fight through all the Wyatts; why not have him take out Harper and Rowan in a minute each to establish how dominant he is? Heck, John Cena's here every day... why hand him the title shot instead of having him destroy everyone the Authority sends at him until they finally agree to it? Randy Orton got insanely over by beating the Rhodeses and destroying the Miz; can't he do that to someone else? Instead, it's Brock who gets that honor of being a harbinger of doom. You know Batista will get this honor when he returns. The only regular who gets this kind of treatment is Big Show, but he's done it so often it drags his opponents down – witness the match he had with Bryan in September. When this happens, it just makes the people who wrestle now, every day, look bad, while the people like Big Show and Brock who were around ten years ago..."
ReplyDeleteFUCK to the YES. This is infuriating.
What, the review?
ReplyDeleteTotally understand this point of view, I guess a lot of it will fall on how Daniel Bryan "explains himself". Maybe it was just the buildup after months and months of beatings/being screwed/etc....and he kinda gave an explaination "the machine wouldn't let me win despite crowd support, winning matches". It totally makes sense, but it's also a bummer turning a heel one of the most enjoyable faces they have.
ReplyDeleteYa can't wish for WWE to make new stars then poo poo on the rub Bryan joining the Wyatt's gives them.
ReplyDeleteHe is giving a very passionate speech on the first comment.
ReplyDeleteAnd that's the point. This is the biggest middle finger I've seen from the booking team to the fans ever. John Cena was conscripted into joining Nexus -- can you imagine if they had him volunteer to join? Can you imagine if Goldberg showed up in black and white and praised Hogan? How about if Hulk offered his services to Bobby Heenan? It would be a huge gut punch. That's what we got.
ReplyDeleteAnd if Bryan/Wyatt had a finish and they went their separate ways, that would be a rub. This was a smothering.
ReplyDeleteIt wasn't time yet to blow this off, especially on a RAW like this
ReplyDelete"This is the biggest middle finger I've seen from the booking team to the fans ever this month."
ReplyDeleteFTFY
Were you upset when Punk joined the New Breed?
ReplyDeleteYou have a point, but what if it's a swerve from HHH's part, you know, to troll us for a while?
ReplyDeleteI'm just saying see how it plays out. So Bryan joined the Wyatt's tonight, seems like there's more to this than just "yup, wwe says fuck you to the fans and Bryan is a heel."
ReplyDeleteThis is the start of the storyline.
We've been thinking everything since SummerSlam is HHH trolling us. I'm not listening to the wolf cry anymore.
ReplyDeleteStart? It's been over two months now since Wyatt attacked Bryan with the whole "the devil made me do it" line afterward. Maybe they have something planned, but everything up to this point smacked of last minute changes, no foresight, and a true lack of planning.
ReplyDeleteThis. This. This.
ReplyDeleteAm I the only one that thinks this is a set up and it's gonna lead to Brian turning on the Wyatt's for a humongous pop at either the rumble or the raw before?
ReplyDeleteThe overall core problem here is that WWE doesn't want to believe that the smart fans are only 5%. Oh sure, the people who can spell Meltzer and Alvarez are 5%, but in terms of the "liking great matches set up by great angles with no nonsensical bullshit involved" fans, its above 40% at least, and in places like Philly/NY/Chicago/Most of Canada its closer to 60%.
ReplyDeleteWhen you go down the path of hating your own fanbase because they make too many demands and ask why you aren't as good as you were x years ago and why things aren't imporving, you can't really go back, and you die a slow, painful death. WWE thinks the answer is ripping their core, significantly more loyal fanbase(cause when the kids become adults they'll see wrestling as stupid unless something awesome resonates with them, which WWE is avoiding) into shreds for the sake of stock prices, locker room satisfaction, and the short term gain, only to gore itself on its own sword.
As Scott once said, Vince really was the last to "get it"
I like you Andy but this new storyline of Bryan joining the Wyatt's is about five minutes old. Why not give it a chance if you are a Bryan fan?
ReplyDeleteWe have no idea where the story is going, and the show ended just about an hour ago. I'm willing to give it at least one more week before I start going negative on the direction.
ReplyDeleteWhat is this going to lead to? Bryan is on a big enough pedestal that all he needs is another big win over a marquee guy to propel him to ME for life. The Wyatts will not give DBry enough credibility, the company won't use the Wyatts properly in the long term, and the storyline is ending around EC. What does anyone stand tog ain from this?
ReplyDeleteYou're not the only one, I think that might be the case too. And I hope it is, not just b/c that would be the smart move, but also it would make some of these babies stop fucking crying about it. Good lord...
ReplyDeleteNo because I also have watched wrestling longer than 7 minutes
ReplyDeleteWatch and find out, which is my whole point.
ReplyDeleteEven if that happens, it's a reset button. All you've done is prolong the story artificially.
ReplyDeleteI didn't catch Raw tonight so I'm just going off the recap here. I'm tired of playing the see where it goes game cause it always ends up in the same place. They are bringing back a bunch of old timers and making them seem more important than the people fans cheer for and pay money to see. I've been working in corporate America for about 8 years. They don't care, they really don't care.
ReplyDeleteSo something happens for two months then something dramatically shifts. Yeah, no planning!
ReplyDeleteI thought those exact things before the Jackknife on Punk and the RKO on Bryan. Gee, wonder what happened there!
ReplyDeleteSo why do you watch?
ReplyDeleteThen why do you still watch then? Honestly?
ReplyDeleteThis will last less than 2 weeks. As a certain admiral might say, IT'S A TRAP
ReplyDeleteThey let Bryan beat their star, then their other star, then tap out HBK, then knock HBK the fuck out, then win their rigged awards, now they have him kowtow to a piddling 80s-style gimmick faction. I'm not sure I've ever seen a slow-burn reverse push. They have until the Rumble or they've just killed this guy dead.
ReplyDeleteWe WANTED Bryan to get screwed, remember. We wanted it as part of a great storyline that never happened, granted, but no one was surprised OR angry that Bryan got screwed at SSlam.
ReplyDeleteI still say it's a bit of an over-reaction - right now, anyway (I have the option of changing my mind next week). The Daniel Bryan-Wyatts angle MAIN EVENTED RAW. The show went off the air with the camera on Daniel Bryan, with the fans shell-shocked by his choice to join the Wyatts.
ReplyDeleteWhether you think HHH is trying to bury Bryan or not, Bryan has remained over throughout this entire push, from the moment Sheamus kicked him in the face right through to now.
If Bryan is on the pre-show come Elimination Chamber (or even Extreme Rules), then yeah, it was a burial. Otherwise, they are putting time and effort into a complex stroyline with D-Bry, looking to pull the EXACT REACTION you gave them.
If you think about it, your rant tonight means HHH wins.
The "letter from HHH" nicely sums up 2013. Curious if they can pull their heads out of their asses for the build to Mania
ReplyDeleteBecause its not 1999 "Fuck this I'm ragequitting" WCW yet. Not even close. Also, there is plenty of hope for Reigns, who is more than palatable, and Cesaro, when Vince is presumably done making him serve penace for dropping Cena's bags at the airport
ReplyDelete(PS: Bryan, I like you, you do damn nice work, so if this escalates, nothing personal)
Yeah, because WWE has a demonstrable track record of finishing
ReplyDeletestorylines strong. It's WWE and Breaking Bad, neck and neck in terms of
understanding the art of storytelling. Grow up. You sound like the same
clowns cautioning patience after HIAC...and SummerSlam, and Punk's heel
turn, and Cena-Brock, and Punk-HHH at NOC, and SummerSlam '11, and...
Missed Raw tonight but I like what they are doing with Bryan for one simple fact, it confirms that HHH is a regular reader of the Blog of Doom. I love the way HHH and co are trolling the smarks....
ReplyDeleteWhy do you even bother watching?
ReplyDeleteInteresting experience watching the show with two of my brothers for the first time in a year (the girlfriend and I are out of town for the holidays). One brother hasn't watched in 3 years. The other has a smark mentality but doesn't read the sheets or wrestling websites.
ReplyDeleteMy older brother (who hasn't watched for a few years) found the multiple authority figures and Wyatts to be hilarious but not in a good way.
My little brother (the smark) and I saw this as either: 1. Turning your hottest babyface heel for the potential of a soap opera-esque storyline--and we know where WWE's track record is with this. Or 2. Bryan getting plenty of air time but still on a spiral down the card despite being massively over.
Either way, it's not the smartest thing we could've seen with either entity, Bryan or Wyatts. We've been waiting for almost 5 months for hope or a solidified main event status for Bryan... and it's still not happening. It still doesn't make sense and we've been a-waitin' and a-seein' it play out for months. It's not necessarily a game changer, this storyline, but it's definitely not filling me with optimism as we head into wrestlemania season.
So let me get this straight, they put Daniel Bryan in the last two quarter hours, plus the over run, because he's NOT meant to be a main eventer?
ReplyDeleteThey've showcased him heavily on TV, given him insane amounts of TV time almost on par with Cena, but he's not mean to be a main eventer?
No Andy, the fact is, because the WWE isn't doing what YOU specifically want them to do they're "sabotaging" Bryan, they're ruining him.
How do YOU Know that this won't play into the Rumble match itself?? Maybe it will, maybe it won't, but right now, NOBODY, not me, not you, knows, because impatient so called "smarks" like yourself, never wait to see how these things play out.
The fact is, it's pretty much the New Year, it's almost Wrestlemania season, I usually wait to reserve any judgement for bad angles or stupid storylines, until the card is announced, Their are several options outside of your black and white assessments, he could be setting a trap for Bray, he could be concocting a master plan to get rid of the Wyatt's and get back to his championship aspirations.
And another thing, they're also trying to elevate the Wyatt's.
Now ALL this being said, if this whole thing is what you say it is, and by Wrestlemania time, Bryan is either a lame duck heel, or a mid-card babyface, than I will conceed that the WWE crapped the bed bigtime. Until then, let it play out for frig sake.
Fair enough. And yeah, if something does escalate and now matter how I come across, I wont take it personal.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the compliment though. I appreciate that.
Seconded!
ReplyDeleteYou're telling me to "grow up" for not flipping out about the end of this show, like you are doing
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cB8TfkdVUTw
As I just said, there is plenty of hope for people to succeed whom I like, not to mention I am definitely not on the Fuck John Cena Express. A fair amount of stuff is acceptable, its just the stuff involving Triple H and protecting people who don't need protection is very frustrating.
ReplyDeleteYou act like someone didn't consciously decide to write the story.
ReplyDelete"Sorry, Brian, the sentient storyline decided that the Wyatts are going to beat you down again. Only thing we can logically do now is have you grovel to Bray and turn heel. Those are the breaks."
They wrote the fucking storyline!
Kane is with the Authority, Punk is trolling to break up the Shield and Bryan has 'joined' the Wyatts. The only hope with this garbage is that these plot lines intersect and these three had been helping one another. It is kind of telling Kane wasn't around.
ReplyDeleteLook, I'm just grasping at straws here. It's going to be the first ever Human Centipede Pedigree at WM and I'm in denial.
Im actually hearing that HHH has set up a Buried Alive match featuring Bryan next week....
ReplyDeleteWell, he has won every match against them other than the handicap match and is now joining them. And this is the second or third go around of the "come and join me" thing, so...now, this is just a hunch...Vince/Trips have gone back and forth on what the hell they are doing with him.
ReplyDeleteWe let it play out with Daniel Bryan after SummerSlam, when they spent three straight weeks having everyone forced to watch him in a heap.
ReplyDeleteWe let it play out when he won the belt, only to have it yanked away by executive decree.
We let it play out when Shawn Michaels was turned heel because that was seen as more desirable than giving us what we told the WWE we wanted.
We let it play out when, two weeks ago, they had Daniel Bryan show he meant something by taking Orton through 25 minutes and looking like a hero.
Every time, we were lied to. Every. Stinking. Time.
I'm sick of letting it play out. The more we let it play out, the worse it gets.
Right, there's a storyline, and this is nowhere near the last chapter, and they're still going to be writing the storyline, next week, the week after and the week after.
ReplyDeleteThis was the opening chapter to a new story. If you don't like it from the preview, that's fine, but there's still time.
For some reason it's just not sinking in for you, the dude has gotten his ass beat for MONTHS, and the authority/machine/whatever the hell they are called continue to screw him over, put him in gauntlet/handicap matches. "Daniel Bryan" reached his breaking point....to me, this probably should've happened on a PPV instead of a random Raw, but I understand his motivations, and he "groveled" to him, after a vicious beatdown, and after 2 grueling matches. Yes, it might/will still turn out to suck, but so far, I can't complain.
ReplyDeleteHa ha ha ha ha.
ReplyDeleteIt is Old School Raw! Uncut, Uncooked. And not making any sense!
Which is the whole point, give him something to do until post-Rumble
ReplyDeleteWouldn't the most logical thing for Bryan to do is ask Punk or someone for help? I went to Raw a few months ago when they teamed together against the Wyatt family. So what happened to that? There are like 363 babyfaces on the roster doing nothing right now, 367 if we count the black guys that only dance. You mean to tell me he couldn't ask any of them for help?
ReplyDeleteIt's almost like everyone forgets they need to do stuff to fill until post-Rumble and the Mania build. If your big conclusion after tonight is Bryan-Wyatt is now the Mania program, maybe writing about wrestling isn't for you.
ReplyDeleteHow were we lied to? It's not like they're treating Daniel Bryan like Zack Ryder. He's not being chased by Kane while failing to change a tire, he just main evented Raw with a dude who they're trying to elevate.
ReplyDeleteIf you're sick of letting it play out, you have to stop watching, because there's no end to the cycle. It keeps going over and over.
At the very least, give it to the follow-up next week. That's more telling of a burial than the start of an angle. .
This is a good point, and would be the best counterpoint to this angle I think. Although, Daniel Bryan doing this himself, fits within his character (and Team Hell No's breakup), so it makes sense from that perspective, but I agree, this might have been a better way to do it.
ReplyDeleteThey DIDN'T need to do something. They didn't need a big twist. All four of these guys are believed to be in the Royal Rumble -- that's all we need. This is a twist for a twist's sake, and why is it that those for the past five months have all made Daniel Bryan look weaker?
ReplyDeleteAndy's smart, but like Scott and most human beings hes prone to drive his point home fueled more by emotion than by thought with a clear head and perspective. Its fairly obvious this is ending by EC, or maybe even RR. Andy is likely venting because this is starting to become a Sopranos moment, where the only objective is infuriating their fanbase, not in a "I can't believe the bad guy won out" way, but more of a "I can't believe they are doing this and expecting ratings" way.
ReplyDeleteI wouldn't have a problem with him giving up if he'd exhausted all angles, but he didn't explore any other angles at all.
ReplyDeleteI thought the Rollins/Punk match was pretty damn good... as for the overall booking I can't disagree. I feel really bad for Daniel Bryan, no one works harder and delivers more than he has over the last year, and yet I think they are sabotaging him because he doesn't fit the WWE mold of a main eventer. No matter what you do with this guy the fans will cheer because talent will over rule negative booking but I think they are determined to make sure he is never a top guy.. which is ridiculous when you have someone that over and that good. Sadly with Batista back soon things are only going to get worse for the likes of Punk and DB... it's almost 2014 and Vince's fetish for big muscle men continues to blight the future of the product.
ReplyDeleteGreat rant.
ReplyDeleteThat's why they put Punk into the Shield story, he's not available to help Bryan because he has his own trio to deal with. And who else do you want to try and help D-Bry? Kofi? The Usos? God forbid they send Miz out there.
ReplyDeleteWould it hurt to ask? Or ask Batista or Brock
ReplyDeleteLast time it was Bryan against the world like this, a dozen guys rushed in to help him. Are they really more afraid of the Wyatts than the Authority? He should NOT have felt helpless.
ReplyDeleteYeah, Brock seems like the kind of guy who would go out of his way to help a random dude out.
ReplyDeleteYou gave Rollins vs. Punk a *1/4 rating? I know they had some botches but you rated this the same as Khali vs. Sandow.
ReplyDeleteThat's exactly why it would work. Brock might agree just to beat people up. No one is saying they have to be best pals.
ReplyDeleteThere's a paragraph explaining it mid-recap. I knew this would seem odd.
ReplyDeleteIt's not sinking in for me? You continue to use the storyline--presumably written by human beings--to explain the turn that the storyline--yup, still written by human beings--HAD to take. But it's not sinking in for me?
ReplyDeleteDo you get how this works? That someone, or someones made a consciously decision to write a storyline in which Daniel Bryan, the most over face in the company, just turned heel via groveling at another man's feet. And then leaving with him after having the shit beaten out of him again.
But The Storyline demanded it! Is the Platonic form of story manifesting itself on Raw? What do you not get? People are pissed off because the human beings responsible wrote a really fucking stupid storyline.
I don't think Brock would work because Heyman said "all we're caring about is being the champion", but that goes more to the sad state of WWE faces that there's really no one else that can credibly help Daniel Bryan without inducing eye rolling at this point.
ReplyDeleteHave a part timer come out and take out a stable you are trying to get over..."The Smarks would pick that apart HHH..."
ReplyDeleteI'm not suggesting its a good twist, but it's clearly some minor angle just for the next few weeks, not a massive character shift or foretelling of any Mania plans.
ReplyDeleteHe's still the most over face and he was in the main event spot. He isn't getting shifted to an IC title feud.
Mark.
ReplyDeleteThis is just another flavor of HBK/JBL.
Let it play out and see where it goes.
When the boss is singling out one guy, his coworkers come out to help as a show of solidarity. When a trio of hillbillies are attacking you, it doesn't warrant the same firepower as fighting Triple H, Vince McMahon, Kane, Stephanie, Randy Orton and the Shield.
ReplyDeleteeww, I hope its not a flavor of that angle, I hated that one...
ReplyDeleteIt has no chance of happening but I think it would be a nice swerve that wouldn't be boring. It would also add some intrigue and depth to Brock's character.
ReplyDeleteAs far as the Heyman thing, he's blown Heyman off before so there is already a precedent for it.
PERFECT comp. this is a transition storyline.
ReplyDeleteNo apparently it's STILL not sinking in for you. It's a LOGICAL turn in the story that after months of having his brains beat in, a guy who's offering his help (no matter how sinister it is, who's promising to him that they will "rule the world"), and having been repeatedly beat down by said group, and is not getting any consistent help from anyone else....his former tag team partner is now a member of the authority, who is now continuously screwing him....sorry if that doesn't make sense to you, but it makes sense to me.
ReplyDeleteIt has no chance in hell of happening, but it's something I think that would benefit everyone if booked correctly.
ReplyDeleteYou know what? That angle was disheartening and made the face look bad. And the payoff wasn't worth the wait. That's one angle -- the face voluntarily surrenders to the heel -- we should never have, because no one looks good.
ReplyDeleteHHH: They're on to us!
ReplyDeleteHe wasn't turned heel! He didn't take the mic and tell the fans to stick it. Yes, people chose to write this into the storyline. They had options to go another way, but it didn't happen.
ReplyDeleteWho knows, by next week, maybe Bryan gives Wyatt a running knee and the whole thing is over. Where do we go from there?
I think you're confusing, being "lied" to, with not getting what you want. I said from the MOMENT Orton cashed in, that I had a feeling this thing will play out until Wrestlemania.
ReplyDeleteI agree that the WWE has screwed up along the way with the tease at Night of Champions and the debacle at Payback, but we've seen some compelling TV along the way as well.
The one thing I agree with the smarks on is that, this angle should end, with Daniel Bryan, at Wrestlemania, hoisting the belt in the air.... PERIOD! That much I agree on. And if it doesen't....even if this storyline with the Wyatt's culminates at 'Mania after a good played out angle....I will still conceed the WWE f'd up badly with Bryan.
Yes, their are more ways they can screw up than they can succeed, but if this thing pans out by 'Mania time in a creative way which the masses love, than that'd be awesome. If not, then your complaints will have merit.
At what point did it make logical sense for Stone Cold to join the Corporation?
ReplyDeleteCome on man, isn't that somewhat disrespectful to say that writing about wrestling isn't for this man based on his opinion?
ReplyDeleteIn a world where Scott has (deservedly) moved to a Howard Stern on Sirius-like Raw schedule, Andy is good enough to not only thoroughly review Raw each week, but to have his posts up mere SECONDS after the show ends.
Andy, writing about wrestling--one of the most subjective things on earth--is definitely for you.
This angle reminds me of the the time Dusty joined the Four Horsemen cause he got tired of getting beat up by them.
ReplyDeleteYeah, because the Wyatt's could take them to the woods and, well, do stuff to them.
ReplyDeleteAfter getting beat down and screwed over for months, the face joins the enemy because he feels defeated, hates himself for doing so but does it anyway because he feels defeated, then finally has something happen that sees him go back to his old ways. A million movies have this storyline
ReplyDeleteA lot of that was because the blowoff match had to be with JBL, who's not the world's greatest wrestler.
ReplyDeleteYes and two months later nobody remembers/cares about it.
ReplyDeleteOr, as someone said below, Austin joining the Corporation during 98-99-00.
ReplyDeleteHere's the thing about this: the ONLY way Bryan holds that belt up at Mania is if he wins the Rumble. That MUST happen -- he's not getting a title match otherwise. And now that he's surrendered his freedom to the Wyatts, Bray will not LET it happen.
ReplyDeleteSo what if he changes his mind and goes nuts on the Wyatts? Then this whole rip your heart out and stomp on your life moment was a fake-out, designed to get us talking and not to tell a story. That's kinda worse. It shows they don't care about their craft.
Either way, this not only did not need to happen, but cannot possibly lead to anything positive. Neutral is the best case.
Why do you still watch?
ReplyDeletelulz
ReplyDeleteI don't get it, you've never seen a storyline where someone pretends to join a heel stable then turns on them? DDP-nwo, new age outlaws-corporation etc
ReplyDeletePeople can take each detail of Bryan's character arc and make it look like they are still doing great things with him. They can dissect these things--the main events, the tv time, etc--but your point still stands. Bryan looks weaker with these twists even though he may be the most over guy in their company. It doesn't matter if we're talking about Cena, Orton, Sheamus, or Punk--we could be talking about anyone--if you're not rolling with the #1 babyface you have, then you shouldn't be the primary booker for a wrestling company anymore. It's just silly when you get right down to it. I'm not even that upset with things (I was in late August...but I've been beaten down plenty since then), but it's just so bloody illogical to NOT ride this Bryan wave.
ReplyDeleteStill, if this ends with Bryan manipulating the Wyatts into helping him win the Rumble while still maintaining his face status, then, yes, we'll eat crow, our words, and humble pie with egg on our faces. And we'll do it with a smile.
Yeah, and Hollywood has better scriptwriters which is why the angle works. This was IIRC a typical WWE last minute changes special designed to kill time until a buildup with the Taker would be feasible
ReplyDeleteAnd the "no one looks good" is just nonsense that can't be proven. It's just something you say to shit on it before anything happens.
ReplyDeleteAndy does a decent job but you cant get all upset at the beginning of an angle because some in the past didnt play out to your liking...
ReplyDeleteWhat would be the end game though? Unless its the Wyatt's finishing off Brock like the Shield did with Taker, its not a good plan...
ReplyDeleteI'm not even talking about Stone Cold because Daniel Bryan isn't Stone Cold. For this particular storyline arc, I can understand his motivations, although as a "fan" I'm disappointed in it. But again to each their own, I watch wrestling to be entertained, if I"m not, I turn it off and don't watch, this was the first episode in a long time I watched pretty much the entire way through.
ReplyDeleteIf you want to run this storyline, then Bryan should not have won at Summerslam in the first damn place.
ReplyDeleteWant to do a HHH screwjob? 1, 2, OW MY ARM, KICK PEDIGREE, drag Cena on top, pinfall. Orton runs out, RKO Cena, cash in, pinfall, off air.
Then Bryan doubting himself MAKES TOTAL SENSE. Bryan being willing to take the help MAKES TOTAL SENSE. But, instead, we seem to get the usual "69 rewrites to the angle in 6-9 months" because SOMEONE up there woke up on the wrong side of the bed
Agree 100%.
ReplyDeleteAnd the 50/50 on watching next week comment is pure overeaction
Whereas the Authority could make Kane ignite the ringposts or have Orton shit in their bag. Clearly much easier to deal with.
ReplyDeleteIt was the Hart Foundation in '97. Crawled to Bret's feet on his hands and knees and renounced his US citizenship. But The Storyline made sense! I'm so glad we let that one play out and saw where it went.
ReplyDeleteI don't see any money in the Wyatt's so finishing them off wouldn't bother me. After that you can take Brock and Bryan wherever you wish.
ReplyDeleteIt's not like Brock would be breaking character. He's a mercenary that fights for the check. If Bryan is paying him or something why wouldn't he help him?
I really hope this Wyatt family angle doesn't change the rumored plans for Bryan to host WM XXX......
ReplyDeleteDDP was "part of the NWO" for how long again? 30 seconds?
ReplyDeleteBryan got screwed over at SummerSlam so it fits in with the storyline perfectly.
ReplyDeleteI agree, he very well should win the Rumble. I'm on the same page as you with that one!
ReplyDeleteHow is it not telling a story? How is him infiltrating the group to finally get rid of them and defeat them, not telling a story. It's seen as a smart move. I have a feeling that Bryan, Bray, Rowan and Harper will all be in the Rumble, or at the very least, Bray & Bryan, and this faded picture that began tonight will come into focus.
The problem with some of the fans today, is that they are a "We want it when we want it, and that is NOW" kind of people.
Doing the recaps is great. This just reads like someone who had a shitty day and wanted to vent. This is writing for himself instead of the audience.
ReplyDeleteIm not sure how finishing off a young fresh stable is good for the future. I mean one minute folks complain about the part timers, the next they want em burying the guys that have to mean something the rest of the year....
ReplyDeleteHere's the biggest issue: we already HAD rock bottom. Rock bottom came when Shawn superkicked Bryan. When even his mentor kept him from being the champion, he hit rock bottom. It became clear the world was against him. The Wyatts are where he finally realizes that he can either get mad about it or he can DO something. It's where he turns around and begins fighting back, then storms the citadel.
ReplyDeleteRight now, it's official: the Authority has won. Do you really think that Bryan's winning the Rumble?
Think about it. Why would a flunky do that?
If that's what it is, I'll admit to being worked. But I don't feel confident that it is what it is. Ever since they announced Batista's return, I have felt he's the clubhouse favorite.
ReplyDeleteBecause he "thinks" having the backing of a group that has repeatedly beat his ass will help him with his goals AND get him out of the crosshairs of the McMahons?
ReplyDeleteYet he MADE IT TO THE TOP BY HIMSELF.
ReplyDeleteHe didn't need HHH Pedigreeing Cena to win, he didn't need Orton's music to distract Cena... he's shown he can make it to the top, get through the crap in his way.
Wyatt and Friends are not doing anything "extreme" to Bryan... nothing that would be out of place in any other feud. So why can't Bryan beat them without joining them, whether a real joining or a fake out, as some are thinking?
I don't hold any positive expectations for this outcome, but I find it interesting that this angle happened around the same time Vince said there are no longer faces or heels.
ReplyDeleteI don't care if he wins the rumble. I care that he's over and puts on great matches and is positioned well. My happiness in watching him isn't tied to a shiny belt.
ReplyDeleteFair enough, except there's no time. Now, the next step is for him to realize, no, they can't help him either. He has to do it himself. And the realization that they're not enough has to be when he doesn't win the Rumble.
ReplyDeleteI've said before and I'll retype it here. The Wyatt family is a dead end gimmick because they don't have a logical endgame. The point of wrestlers appearing on wrestling programs is to win matches in order to move up the card. They don't seem to care about that so why do they exist in the wrestling world? Bryan joining them is going to help them do what exactly?
ReplyDeleteI agree with you there's a definite time crunch for this to potentially play out, but it's not impossible, that's why I'll watch to find out.
ReplyDeleteMaybe Bryan is being smart and looking back at stuff that worked in the past. When Hogan had an issue, he went to his buddy Hillbilly Jim and his minions, so maybe Bryan is hoping history repeats itself with his own hillbillies....
ReplyDeleteHe couldnt get the belt though. That is the top. He won, they yanked the belt away from him. At the end, he lost. They set up obstacles for him and now he is dealing with a stable of lunatics who are stalking and attacking him constantly so he feels defeated. At some point, he snaps out of it and goes back to his old ways and hopefully gets the belt.
ReplyDeleteIts tough when creative writes everything on the fly though
I struggle to find the words to explain it, but I don't understand why people are so focused on him winning some mythical belt rather than being over and positioned as a big deal. Like if he doesn't win the Rumble, so what? Is his career over? If he doesn't get his big win over Orton at WM, is he getting fired?
ReplyDeleteLet me ask you a question: is the only endgame that makes you happy Bryan winning the strap at Mania? Because that ship probably sailed a while ago, if the course was ever even set that way.
ReplyDeleteToo many people are involved in the creative process of the show. It makes for logic gaps and constant twists in the stories.
ReplyDeleteThis gimmick is different though, its a cult thing. Sure, its not for everybody but at least it not the same cookie cutter BS. It stands out and WWE is showing that they do recognize Bryan's heat, as they are using it to get a group of guys over. Pretty much what the business is about, using one guy to get more over.....
ReplyDeleteTo me Bryan doesn't need to have the belt, he is already the most over guy in the company right now.
ReplyDeleteI do not get for the Bryan fans who are pissed and debating about watching next week, why you would say that? If he is your fan, aren't you watching to root for him next week?
ReplyDeleteHe was in the main event angle of the show, does it not mean anything if he isnt champ?
ReplyDeleteYou wrote a very entertaining recap and have explained yourself clearly. You don't have to defend the point much more than that. The people who disagree are optimists but really have to look at the big picture...
ReplyDelete-Bryan in August of 2013
-Punk in July of 2011
-Jeff Hardy in December of 2007
-Edge in January of 2006
-RVD in September of 2002
If you don't ride with your number one face's wave of popularity, business takes a turn for the worse after they are shunted down the card or are dicked around too much. The iron was hot, but WWE refused to strike. No matter what happens, we are in Plan A which should've been a Plan B. It could still be entertaining, but yeah, a lot of us have the same thoughts as you did.
Which is my point though, there is no endgame. What is the purpose of the cult? With Ravens flock they were outcast bonding to fight against the people that the perceived as shunning them. The Wyatts have no such motivation. We don't even know why Harper and Rowan hang with him. It's just a bunch of guys that hang together.
ReplyDeleteWell, look at it this way: the whole story of the Authority is that they believe fans are stupid and backing the wrong horse. That's what "best for business" means: it means that the Authority knows better than the fans what the fans want to see. If Daniel Bryan -- the people's choice -- doesn't prove them wrong, he proves them right. If he doesn't win, that's the WWE, through HHH, saying that we the fans don't count because we don't know what will make people watch the show even though we're the ones watching it.
ReplyDeleteYou've actually made the story "the suits vs the fans"; why NOT have the fans win?
Do you get how storytelling works? When people are invested in a character, they want that character to be featured, and to succeed at their desired goals. It's why people are uplifted and satisfied when the hero triumphs at the end in virtually all forms of popular storytelling.
ReplyDeleteWould the original Star Wars trilogy have been satisfying if Luke had groveled to Vader on his hands and knees and joined the Sith? Who gives a shit, Hamill's got a nice role, and he's making some good money! Don't be too cool, pal.
"but I don't understand why people are so focused on him winning some mythical belt rather than being over and positioned as a big deal"
ReplyDeleteThis is what is wrong with Sports Entertainment and the WWE as it currently stands.
THE BELT SAYS YOU ARE THE MAN. END OF STORY. EVERY FUCKING WRESTLER SHOULD BE GUNNING FOR THAT TITLE... WHETHER RIGHT NOW, ONE WEEK FROM NOW, ONE MONTH FROM NOW, ONE YEAR FROM NOW, THREE YEARS FROM NOW, FIVE YEARS FROM NOW, AND SO ON.
WRESTLING OVER THEME SONGS, CHILD CUSTODY, SHAMPOO COMMERCIALS, CATCHPHRASES, ETC... THAT SHOULD NEVER BE MORE THAN A DISTRACTION.
Fuck you, fuck anyone in that locker room who thinks like you, fuck any fan who thinks like you... shit like that makes me wish the lot of you would have never discovered wrestling.
(hands off keyboard, calming down now)
The story isnt ending after tonight
ReplyDeleteMaybe they are building to tell us what he holds over those fellas....
ReplyDeleteWhy do you still watch?
ReplyDeletehahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah
ReplyDeleteBecause that's not what is best for business....
ReplyDeleteYeah, I can't wait for Bryan's Joseph Campbell-hero's journey to finally culminate. WWE is renowned for it's classical storytelling.
ReplyDeleteYou do realize that 3 months after the jackknife on punk he began the longest wwe title reign in 20 some years correct?
ReplyDeleteThis was before or after he tearfully told Bret that Bret was the greatest wrestler of all time?
ReplyDeleteI'm cancelling cable tomorrow, and I was worried I'd miss watching Raw on Monday nights.
ReplyDeleteNOPE.
Didnt Luke go to Vader on his hand and knees in ROTJ?
ReplyDeleteI already asked him that. He didnt answer though but he might downvote the question
ReplyDeleteI'm just going to stare at you in disbelief that you honestly think that not making your paying customers happy is a good idea.
ReplyDeleteAnd you realize that other than losing said belt to the Rock, and losing the rematch... he was never the Main Event or the "top guy"?
ReplyDeleteWaiting to sign up for WWE Network, eh.....
ReplyDeleteWrestlemania isn't the end of the movie. Luke doesn't kill Darth Vader at the end of the first one. Why? There's still money to make.
ReplyDeleteAdd me to the people that think that if the 'E doesn't lose their interest in this storyline next week, that Bryan and Bray are the last 2 people in the Rumble and Bryan dumps him.
ReplyDeleteHe might have been sarcastic there.
ReplyDeleteThat's not the point, I was just saying there are many examples of faces pretending to join heel stables and then turning on them. It's not outside the realm of possibility
ReplyDeleteDont watch then
ReplyDeleteWait, Luke killed Vader? I thought he saved him? Maybe Bryan is trying to save the Wyatts?
ReplyDeleteMust be nice to just stick with things that only provide immediate gratification.
ReplyDeleteThe belt is the means to an end, not the end.
ReplyDeleteYeah, this isn't stopping me from watching or hoping for a killer promo next week to explain what we have on our hands here. I can buy most of what you're selling. But if they are Bryan fans, you might have to accept the fact that they have been beaten down pretty badly over the last few months with these teases and twists.
ReplyDeleteSo why do you still watch?
ReplyDeleteWhy would Punk want to be on a B show like Main Event?
ReplyDeleteExcept they started to move away from that the minute they announced the unification. It stopped being about Bryan and whether he was an A+ player the minute Cena came back, matches including Bryan not withstanding.
ReplyDeleteThere's still a lot of time between now and Mania. And maybe they maneuver Bryan back into the main event scene and towards a Mania main event. But we have no way of knowing based on this Raw.
Yeah, because WWE and the Wire have so much in common. Slow burn, complex long term storytelling. HHH and Vince are pretty much David Simon and Ed Burns.
ReplyDeleteIs it nice inside that WWE bubble?
John Cena vs. Bray Wyatt for Daniel Bryan's heat
ReplyDeleteMELTZER WAS RIGHT! IT ALL MAKES SENSE NOW!
Andy is letting the Wyatt family cloud his mind tonight, lol.....
ReplyDeleteI see people who're saying as to how this Bryan-Wyatt thing is dumb because of the timing of it all. Why now? Why would Bryan feel that he can't win the machine after a gauntlet with the Wyatts rather than the number of times he's had the title screwed from him.
ReplyDeleteThink about it. He's been beating main eventers for a while now. Heck, two weeks ago, he beat Randy Orton. AGAIN! And yet, the title match for the Rumble is Cena-Orton, EVEN THOUGH CENA LOST TO ORTON CLEAN!
I think it's the perfect time to snap for Bryan. No matter what he does, it's not good enough, the man will never think he's good enough. So it's better to join the Wyatts.
The track record, like you posted below, is not very impressive at all. However, why declare this dead already?
ReplyDeleteTrue about the writing. Too many people involved in the creative process with seemingly little long-term planning
"If I can change, you can change. We can all change!"
ReplyDeleteFor the record, I didn't like when Bryan won at Night of Champions, and everything since then has been painful decision after painful decision. I was willing to ride this out.
ReplyDeleteWouldn't it make more sense to join the corporation with that thought process?
ReplyDeleteThe one positive... it ain't much, and it won't stop me from selling my WM tickets...
ReplyDeleteThere are two PPVs before WM. Plenty of time to swap stuff around, as people are saying below. But I'm not holding my breath on anything good.
I thought Bryan vs rollins was 2 stars but yeah that wasn't a good look for rollins in a big spot with punk. He's had so many great matches I won't hold it against him though
ReplyDeleteI'll admit he wasn't booked perfectly, but if you think getting wins over cena and feuding with the rock while holding the wwe title for 14 months doesn't make you a "top guy" then I think we have different definitions of what it means
ReplyDeleteTrue, but maybe this has made him completely snap, so he joins an insane group of lunatics who promised him they will "rule the world together". Makes sense too.
ReplyDeleteWait a minute, now Bryan is Rocky and the Wyatt's are Drago?! Im just not buying Brie Bella in the Adrian role....
ReplyDeletePreach.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IBB0M8mQeL4
ReplyDeleteYes, there's plenty of ways to make Bryan a strong heel or a strong face with a good follow through with this storyline. Let's hope they find one of those ways--Bryan infiltrating and destroying the Wyatts, Bryan using the Wyatts to get the title, etc. How would you book it?
ReplyDeleteHave you found someone to replace you next week since you're taking your ball and going home?
ReplyDeleteAnything other than huge face push for Bryan is unacceptable
ReplyDeleteI just can't buy it man. If he joined the authority, then yeah, I'd go with it. I just don't see where it's been established where the Wyatt's are this insurmountable group.
ReplyDeleteWell yes, if you argument is that feuds built around the titles are more important than feuds built around some of the stupidest motivations in the world, then I agree.
ReplyDeleteHowever, there are TONS of examples of fantastic feuds built on personal issues rather than titles, many of them more interesting, intense, entertaining and memorable than the title feuds at the time.
Tell me, was Bret/Austin a less interesting feud than Taker/Sid in 1997, because Bret/Austin wasn't about the belt?
The belt is only a prop unless you are main eventing. I recall Goldberg being WCW Champ and not main eventing quite a few PPVs but he still was pretty over....
ReplyDeleteMonday Night Bayless!
ReplyDelete(I dont even want to see that)
C'mon, dude, you know how internet overreacting works.
ReplyDelete"This is awful! You all suck! I'm never doing this again! See you next week."
Yeah, because the WWE has such a great track record with long term storylines!
ReplyDeleteDoesnt add some depth and suspense to the Bryan character? Sure Bryan winning the title is great but then what? If he doesnt hold the title as long as Punk, WWE and HHH screwed him over?
ReplyDeleteThe reason I can buy it was because it's not like it was the first offer or anything like that. The Wyatts have tried over and over again and he kept saying no and fighting through. It finally came to a point where he was unwilling to fight anymore and gave in. Either the corporation/authority/machine or the Wyatts would've worked for me.
ReplyDeleteThese shows are not as interesting as the 80's shows you are used to writing about....
ReplyDelete...I say not enough Putski....
I like to think of WWE as being more like Twin Peaks. Santino is definitely the Log Lady.
ReplyDeleteAndy does a much better job with this than I ever could
ReplyDeletePlus, I dig the 80's shows and shoot recaps